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Old 12-10-2011, 04:50 AM
 
Location: Central Florida
973 posts, read 1,442,959 times
Reputation: 1086

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jess72 View Post
Bullying is worst. Because now there is more technology and the bullying is harder to control because every kid on campus has a cell phone and in seconds a picture or a rude comment or god knows what is spread to every kid on campus. So the bullying is fast spread and rather than being bullied by a few the laughter and points go over the whole campus.

VERY TRUE.... and just another reason WHY phoned should be banned (besides the out and out cheating and thinking texting is more important than getting an education, but tha is off topic!)

And don't forget FB and that ilk. A few suicides have been attributed to cyber bullying already, but hope educaton in this area will help.
I know, too, that as teachers we do not see all that goes on. When my class last year was reading "Self Reliance" and in one section Emerson had written that people will conform so they will not get weird looks and comments, students told me that many of the drama and band kids (who are different in both manner and style) will often get paper thrown at them and food during lunch, and I couldn't believe it. My drama and band geeks throughout the day confirmed this, and from that point on, the administration was alerted to it, and we tried to get those kids to stand up for themselves when it happened, but really to no avail.

Last edited by Sagitarrius48; 12-10-2011 at 04:59 AM..
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Old 12-10-2011, 06:35 AM
 
503 posts, read 654,409 times
Reputation: 380
The only reason that it has gotten "worse" is that we've lowered the standard for what constitutes the definition of bullying to the point that anything, no matter how casual or incidental, that hurts someone's feelings is now considered "bullying".

Kids will always be jerks to one another and the reframing of the definition of bullying is nothing more than an attempt to try to micro-manage personal behavior.
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Old 12-10-2011, 07:36 AM
 
Location: Northern Appalachia
4,702 posts, read 5,853,248 times
Reputation: 5385
I remember a girl in elementary school over 40 years ago who was the subject of severe bullying. Thinking about it still makes me feel awful. This girl was unattractive but her name became the synonym for ugly. Thinking back fortysome years, I can't believe this girl survived. She could have easily committed suicide of had a mental breakdown. She also had severe family issues and was poor. Yes, bullying does exist, has always existed and technology makes the situation worse today. I think it definitely helps when society says that bullying is unacceptable. It will change the behavior of at least some people. There was little done to protect or help this girl. Teachers mostly ignored the situation.
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Old 12-10-2011, 12:12 PM
 
Location: Arizona
1,206 posts, read 2,098,050 times
Reputation: 1529
Kids are just nasty to eachother. It seems to start earlier and earlier, pretty soon bullying will start in Pre-school. I have a 9 year old daughter, yes, she has had small issues with a few girls in her class, but she took care of it straight away and hasn't had any problems since. She started a new school this year, so that was hard already.

I find it a joke that teachers and school administrators tell kids that are being bullied to be nice to their bullies, really? Someone is nasty and you are supposed to be nice to them and ask them to play ball with you? Are you kidding me? Talk about setting a kid up for more hurt.

When my daughter came home and told me one girl was being really rude to her I asked what was going on. She told me this certain girl, whenever my daughter would say something, would say, "so?", even if my daughter wasn't talking to her. It really started to annoy my daughter so I told her to do it right back. So the next day this girl said something and my daughter said, "so?", this girl looked at my daughter and said, "well, that was rude" and my daughter said, "yeah, just like you". The girl stopped and they haven't had problems since. I have always told my daughter if they dish it they better be able to take it and so far standing up to the rude kids has worked. They figured really fast they couldn't push her around. I did tell her though that it is never ok to get physical, if it ever happens that someone puts their hands on her she is to immediatley to to the teacher and then let me know when she gets home.
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Old 12-10-2011, 01:11 PM
 
Location: United State of Texas
1,708 posts, read 5,270,537 times
Reputation: 2095
Quote:
Originally Posted by jasper12 View Post
I see bullying not unlike psychological abuse. And those bullied? You want them to "stand up" for themselves? Like Klebold? Great. Yes, he definitely showed them!
Dragging up a most extreme reaction from an obviously demented individual has little to do with the millions of small incidents that occur daily. Standing up to a bully is a great way to diffuse the situation in a large percentage of cases. It saddens me that so many people are afraid of their shadow these days.
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Old 12-10-2011, 03:24 PM
 
Location: Arizona
1,206 posts, read 2,098,050 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zembonez View Post
Dragging up a most extreme reaction from an obviously demented individual has little to do with the millions of small incidents that occur daily. Standing up to a bully is a great way to diffuse the situation in a large percentage of cases. It saddens me that so many people are afraid of their shadow these days.
This is what I told my daughter to do and it has taken care of every kid that decided to try and be nasty to her.
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Old 12-10-2011, 03:29 PM
 
530 posts, read 960,580 times
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I really dislike all the "blame the victim" type posts here. I was bullied when I was a kid, and first of all, I was neither overweight or unattractive. In fact, if you look at some of the kids who committed suicide from bullying, some of them were rather good looking. This is not happening just to kids who are overweight etc.

Secondly, it is often not just one bully. Bullies often have their group of friends gang up on victims. If you try to stand up to the bully, it sometimes can make things worse. In fact to get a group of bullies off my back in middle school, I did the opposite. I tried to act like nothing they did bothered me. If they talked to me, I did not talk back. I ignored them. It was harder with the physical stuff since I did have to defend myself there, but I tried my best to find ways to keep away from them. It was very difficult though.

Unless you have been a victim, it is hard to understand. I literally was sometimes shaking at school because of I was afraid of what these kids might do next to me. Bullying is absolutely a problem. I am glad today that there are anti-bullying programs. I think they do help, but there still is some bullying pretty much in every school.
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Old 12-10-2011, 07:42 PM
 
15,768 posts, read 13,205,091 times
Reputation: 19652
Before you can determine how much bullying is going on, you have to define the word "bully" (as a verb). Until that can be achieved people will not be able to have a meaningful discussion about it.
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Old 12-10-2011, 09:56 PM
 
Location: WI
2,820 posts, read 3,068,807 times
Reputation: 4815
Quote:
Originally Posted by lkb0714 View Post
Before you can determine how much bullying is going on, you have to define the word "bully" (as a verb). Until that can be achieved people will not be able to have a meaningful discussion about it.
This.

IMO, the problem with the term bullying is that it's so darn subjective. Ask thirty different people about what situations would be thought of as 'bullying' and you'll likely get a large range of answers.

Example-
My son plays soccer, and was told by another kid that soccer is for gays. This particular boy apparently thought it was really funny and said it repeatedly to my son and the other soccer players at school. My son didn't really care because he's a pretty upbeat kind of guy and realized the kid's just really immature, but other boys were hurt.

I think it's tough to have conversations on bullying until 'bullying' is defined. Was what happened to my son bullying?
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Old 12-10-2011, 10:21 PM
 
Location: Upper St. Clair
659 posts, read 955,690 times
Reputation: 354
i believe Jasper made a good point here, kids who do not belong to an group are targets and often are abused, this is so true, I know from personal experience, and I seen others who were not part of one either be abused and yes all the teachers knew and did NOTHING...and its still the same today and it could be worse, I thnk it most liikely is worse...I can remember a girl who never took a bath and wore the same clothese everyday as being one who was abused often, another had an hair issue and had no hair, not sure why but she had it really bad, then there was one who was on drugs and she got beat up for her drugs...I seen so much, I really have little faith in people cause of that, I see the same things go on today sometimes, but people just seem to tolerate or say that its not so bad or its how you look at it, blah blah blah, its all a bunch of bs....
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