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No I don't think so, most of the most involved parents I know come from dual income families.
It's the attitude of "it's not my responsibility". Parents who aren't engaged are usually that way because they think their kids education is not their responsibility. It's the school's responsibility, it's the teacher's responsibility, but not the parent's, and not the child's. If a child is struggling in school, the average American parent no longer thinks "what do I need to do to solve this problem", instead the average American parent thinks "who can I blame for this problem, because it sure as he** isn't MY fault". And if a child is not struggling in school, the average American parent no longer thinks "what else can I do to enrich my child", instead the average American parent thinks "I'm off the hook to do anything yay!".
That goes both ways. Very frequently, parents are given the message, "this is our job" from school faculties.
For instance, when schools don't report problems to parents until they become major. Many times the first time a parent hears there is a problem is when a child is suspended, rather than when issues first begin.
When my daughter was being sexually harassed by another student, the school absolutely refused to take the matter to his parents until it became serious enough. They told us that to our faces.
That goes both ways. Very frequently, parents are given the message, "this is our job" from school faculties.
For instance, when schools don't report problems to parents until they become major. Many times the first time a parent hears there is a problem is when a child is suspended, rather than when issues first begin.
When my daughter was being sexually harassed by another student, the school absolutely refused to take the matter to his parents until it became serious enough. They told us that to our faces.
You know I noticed that too, it's one of the biggest differences between my child's private school and her best friend's (highly rated) public school. At the public school they welcome parental involvement in bake sales and fundraisers, but not homework or problems at school. Where at my child's private school it's the opposite, with teachers telling parents how best to help with homework and encouraging it, and asking for input on curriculum choice and so on, and the smallest problems get notes home right away so that they don't become bigger problems.
I like how you paint all students with the lazy brush but watch out if anyone criticizes teachers!!!
Eh, that's how teachers squirm
their way out of being held accountable.
Blame the kids.
Blame the parents.
Blame the budget.
Blame everyone & anyone else.....
While the kids fail.
Eh, that's how teachers squirm
their way out of being held accountable.
Blame the kids.
Blame the parents.
Blame the budget.
Blame everyone & anyone else.....
While the kids fail.
But everywhere I look around me, the parents and the children are more lazy than they were when I was a child in school, and the teachers these days work harder and more creative than when I was in school. And I'm saying this as a parent. It's not the teachers that are the reason more and more kids are failing. Its the kids who won't work, and the parents who won't make them work.
Where at my child's private school it's the opposite, with teachers telling parents how best to help with homework and encouraging it
Am I the only one that thinks that parent involvement in homework should be minimal? I mean sure, help the kid get on the right track, but the kids should be figuring that stuff out for themselves. I cringe whenever I hear parents say "we have two hours of homework every night." There shouldn't be any "we." The child needs to be responsible for the work, with the parent only offering subtle guidance.
Kids need a chance to wrestle with concepts before getting spoon-fed by their parents. Give them a chance to struggle through it, then offer help. Always err on the side of less help. The kids need to learn to take charge of their educational responsibilities even if they're "not good" at them.
Am I the only one that thinks that parent involvement in homework should be minimal? I mean sure, help the kid get on the right track, but the kids should be figuring that stuff out for themselves. I cringe whenever I hear parents say "we have two hours of homework every night." There shouldn't be any "we." The child needs to be responsible for the work, with the parent only offering subtle guidance.
Kids need a chance to wrestle with concepts before getting spoon-fed by their parents. Give them a chance to struggle through it, then offer help. Always err on the side of less help. The kids need to learn to take charge of their educational responsibilities even if they're "not good" at them.
No, you are not the only one who thinks like that.
Am I the only one that thinks that parent involvement in homework should be minimal? I mean sure, help the kid get on the right track, but the kids should be figuring that stuff out for themselves. I cringe whenever I hear parents say "we have two hours of homework every night." There shouldn't be any "we." The child needs to be responsible for the work, with the parent only offering subtle guidance.
Kids need a chance to wrestle with concepts before getting spoon-fed by their parents. Give them a chance to struggle through it, then offer help. Always err on the side of less help. The kids need to learn to take charge of their educational responsibilities even if they're "not good" at them.
The child needs to be responsible for the work. Absolutely. And the child needs to wrestle with the concepts, absolutely. But the parent needs to be responsible for knowing whether or not the child eventually got the concept, and later whether or not the child has mastered the concept, or needs more practice. And the parent needs to find a way to provide the practice, and then check and make sure the concept has been mastered, even if the class has already long moved on. And the parent is responsible for seeing if there are any holes in what's being covered in school (due to lack of classroom time to cover it because they have to do test prep) and cover the material at home. And teach it, or find a website or a book that teaches it, and let their child wrestle with it, and make their child practice it and demonstrate mastery.
And the parent is responsible for teaching good study habits. Modeling good study habits when they are younger, and gradually having the child take over the studying methods and logistics, with a scaffolding approach, as they get older. And the parent is responsible for noticing any particular difficulties the child has like a learning disability, and getting them the appropriate help, or providing the appropriate help themselves if no outside help is available. And the parent is responsible for noticing if their child is gifted in any area, and getting them the appropriate enrichment, or providing the appropriate enrichment themselves if no outside enrichment is available. And the parent is responsible for communicating with the teacher about any particular struggles or needs that their child is demonstrating at home, so that the teacher can work with the parent and the parent can work with the teacher as a comprehensive team providing the best education possible to the child.
Am I the only one that thinks that parent involvement in homework should be minimal? I mean sure, help the kid get on the right track, but the kids should be figuring that stuff out for themselves. I cringe whenever I hear parents say "we have two hours of homework every night." There shouldn't be any "we." The child needs to be responsible for the work, with the parent only offering subtle guidance.
Kids need a chance to wrestle with concepts before getting spoon-fed by their parents. Give them a chance to struggle through it, then offer help. Always err on the side of less help. The kids need to learn to take charge of their educational responsibilities even if they're "not good" at them.
In many cases--particularly with the more difficult subjects--"helping with the homework" has gone out the window because the subject matter undergoes such extreme changes every few years.
The child needs to be responsible for the work. Absolutely. And the child needs to wrestle with the concepts, absolutely. But the parent needs to be responsible for knowing whether or not the child eventually got the concept, and later whether or not the child has mastered the concept, or needs more practice. And the parent needs to find a way to provide the practice, and then check and make sure the concept has been mastered, even if the class has already long moved on. And the parent is responsible for seeing if there are any holes in what's being covered in school (due to lack of classroom time to cover it because they have to do test prep) and cover the material at home. And teach it, or find a website or a book that teaches it, and let their child wrestle with it, and make their child practice it and demonstrate mastery.
And the parent is responsible for teaching good study habits. Modeling good study habits when they are younger, and gradually having the child take over the studying methods and logistics, with a scaffolding approach, as they get older. And the parent is responsible for noticing any particular difficulties the child has like a learning disability, and getting them the appropriate help, or providing the appropriate help themselves if no outside help is available. And the parent is responsible for noticing if their child is gifted in any area, and getting them the appropriate enrichment, or providing the appropriate enrichment themselves if no outside enrichment is available. And the parent is responsible for communicating with the teacher about any particular struggles or needs that their child is demonstrating at home, so that the teacher can work with the parent and the parent can work with the teacher as a comprehensive team providing the best education possible to the child.
I completely disagree that the bold is the parents' job. Those are all the teacher's job. As Ralph said, above, the subject matter undergoes changes every few years. That is what I was getting at a while back (maybe a different thread too for all I remember) that even my spouse with his PhD in physics couldn't really help with our kids' higher level math. The courses are taught differently than when he took them. Seeing if there are any holes in what's being covered in school assumes that the parent has a mastery of the subject. While that may be the case, at times, it's not always so, and it's not the parents' job to be masters of everything.
Am I the only one that thinks that parent involvement in homework should be minimal? I mean sure, help the kid get on the right track, but the kids should be figuring that stuff out for themselves. I cringe whenever I hear parents say "we have two hours of homework every night." There shouldn't be any "we." The child needs to be responsible for the work, with the parent only offering subtle guidance.
Kids need a chance to wrestle with concepts before getting spoon-fed by their parents. Give them a chance to struggle through it, then offer help. Always err on the side of less help. The kids need to learn to take charge of their educational responsibilities even if they're "not good" at them.
The problem is not that kids are being spoon fed by their parents, but that they aren't gaining sufficient knowledge from the class to be able to figure it out for themselves. Much I believe attributable to very poor lesson and textbook quality. I have advanced degrees and physics/math, but cannot begin to help my son with his math homework. Not because I don't know math, but because whatever is being taught today under the guise of "math" is some completely different thing intentionally designed to confound and confuse young minds. I have been known to mark through explanations in my kids textbooks and replace them with correct ones but that really ticks the teachers off. No, they don't want me helping with my kids homework.
To make matters worse, our school is in the process of going away from textbooks entirely leaving it up to the kids to google everything. Only good thing is mine will be out of school in a couple years before they can implement this nonsense completely.
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