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Depends on individual child readiness. Some children are developmentally ready slightly earlier, some are not. Assessing how he's doing developmentally in preschool will help judge this, and as a parent, if you're paying attention, you know.
My son is not school age yet, but my background is education and child and adolescent development, so I'm very in tune to how he's progressing. He has a late September birthday, which will miss the cutoff here for starting school by nearly a month. Overall, having taught some at the early childhood level, even though we're a few years out, I'm very much fine with that. If he does end up being somewhat developmentally ahead by being more in the neighborhood of a year older than some of his classmates (but, on average, more like half a year older, since there is a normal bell curve, and not all children who start kindergarten "on time" are very new fives), that's really not a bad thing.
No, normal people are not going to assume, if he is functioning well in class, that he "got held back," because he's one of the older in the class...but start him too early, and he may have enough problems adjusting that it ends up being detrimental. FTR, most of the developmental gaps that show up in early elementary years are emotional development, underdeveloped or delayed self-regulation ability, etc., and not intellectual or academic development. For most children, a slightly later start is overall less risky than a to-early start. If there is ever a question, I tend to be more in favor of erring on the side of a later start.
I was middle of the pack in my class, age-wise, with a January birthday...older than a bunch, younger than a bunch. It really doesn't matter if you're on the older end or the younger end, or somewhere in the middle, over time, as long as you are ready to be at the level of schooling where you're at.
To the poster who repped me with the comment that I was "petty"...it didn't take senior year for me to regret it. I noticed his social immaturity compared to his peers throughout HS.
Thank you for adding to my rep points with an insult
DS turns 5 on August 5th and the cutoff in our area is September 1st. He should be starting Kindergarten in the fall, but his preschool teachers have been advising me to wait a year. Even though we can financially afford another year of pre-school, I really want to send him on time.
For me, it's long-term, not short-term. Redshirting means that he'll still be in high school when he's 18. It also means that he'll start his career a year later than most people. Yes, I know some people are going to talk about Malcolm Gladwell's Outliers, but as a parent, I feel like it's my duty to teach DS that he doesn't need trophies or to always be the best in order to be happy.
I also want him to fit in and not feel out of place. I can only imagine how awkward it would feel for him to be 6, while some of his classmates are still 4, 7 while some of his classmates are still 5, etc. His classmates might think there's something wrong with him if was a year older than them, and I'd hate for him to have a bad reputation for something that was not his decision, but ours.
Also, I strongly believe that the cutoff dates are there for a reason. If kids born in August kids truly weren't ready to start Kindergarten at 5, the cutoff would be earlier. The people laying the cutoffs have done thorough studies to figure out when kids should start Kindergarten. They know what they're talking about and I feel like it would be arrogant to act as if I knew better.
Cut offs vary from district to district. If there has been a thorough study, I am unaware of it.
My biggest question is WHY did the preschool teacher say to wait. Is that the teacher's general feeling about all summer birthdays, or is there something particular about your kid?
You sound like you know what you want to do, so what's the question?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy in Wyoming
When anyone is a year behind, people assume that he is stupid and was refused promotion.. It will follow him the rest of his life.
Fifth grade teacher here. By mid-September (we start late August), I can tell you who the youngest kids in the class are. There's really little distinction between average and older age. But each year, there are always a few who have a late summer birthday (our cutoff is Sept ), who struggle with peer interactions & social maturity. And each year I have at least one of those parents approach me about retaining their child from entering middle school. And, although they could probably benefit from being retained, it would have been far better in Kinder/first, where they would have not struggled for so long.
Our Kinder teachers tell us that they have several parents each year who tell them, yeas, I know Johnny/Janie is really young/not ready/immature compared to their peers etc., but since Kinder is free, we'll just have him repeat it next year.
Schools do not, generally, retain students on the basis of social or emotional readiness/maturity. It may be a factor when looking at a child struggling academically, but will not, in all probability, be the sole factor.
I have a student right now who, although he was born in late August, was actually 2 months premature. He has struggled since Kindergarten, not so much academically, but socially and behaviorally. This year, he is also struggling academically, as he cannot remember homework, complete assignments, or even sit next to/work with someone without bothering them. They like him, but cut him a wide swatch in the classroom, as he annoys them. I hope he makes leaps and bounds this summer, as I see him struggling to keep up (in many ways) in middle school.
There is NO hard and fast rule. NO ONE should judge another parent for delaying entry or starting their child. However, if the general advice is pointing in one direction, consider why. Remember, students are very different at school than at home.
I believe you might be over thinking this. There is no wrong decision. If your son is eager to go to kindergarten, send him. He may rise to it, or he may need to be held back next year. The end result is the same, regardless.
My son went to half day kindergarten on schedule, but was not ready for first grade, so he went to all day kindergarten the following year. There were never any issues with his being a bit older. It was even a slight advantage when he played sports later.
It truly is a case by case decision. We tested our youngest in early (she was 4 years old until October in kindergarten). Her, very experienced, kindergarten teacher told us later that she was concerned when she saw her age, but felt that it ended up being a perfect fit for her.
She is in 4th grade now and doing great. Our December born oldest daughter (one of the oldest in her class) has struggled much more than her younger sister and we never would have done that for her.
Our youngest is very bright and very lazy. We were concerned that she would only do what was required of her, so we assumed having her start older would mean she would perform worse in school than she was capable of and be bored. I think boredom can kill the school experience for some kids.
So in our case, it has been a good decision so far (haven't done middle school yet) to have her enter early. She has not had a single teacher feel that it was a bad decision and she tests high for her grade. I will say, though, that all kids mature at a different rate and it's been very interesting to see (I work at a grade school) how some kids seem so composed and others just fall apart at every little thing.
Best of luck! It was a very tough decision for us and I'm sure it is for you as well.
Last edited by RustinginSeattle; 05-14-2017 at 10:04 AM..
Reason: grammar
Fifth grade teacher here. By mid-September (we start late August), I can tell you who the youngest kids in the class are. There's really little distinction between average and older age. But each year, there are always a few who have a late summer birthday (our cutoff is Sept ), who struggle with peer interactions & social maturity. And each year I have at least one of those parents approach me about retaining their child from entering middle school. And, although they could probably benefit from being retained, it would have been far better in Kinder/first, where they would have not struggled for so long.
You said it. I know of three people retained in late elementary school, and they seemed to be self conscious about it for years. Far better to do it kindergarten. (And I'm saying that as a parent of a child who was retained in kindergarten since she was the youngest in her class. Yes, there was a stigma, for a few months; some of it came from parents of her friends, surprisingly.)
Fifth grade teacher here. By mid-September (we start late August), I can tell you who the youngest kids in the class are. There's really little distinction between average and older age. But each year, there are always a few who have a late summer birthday (our cutoff is Sept ), who struggle with peer interactions & social maturity. And each year I have at least one of those parents approach me about retaining their child from entering middle school. And, although they could probably benefit from being retained, it would have been far better in Kinder/first, where they would have not struggled for so long.
Our Kinder teachers tell us that they have several parents each year who tell them, yeas, I know Johnny/Janie is really young/not ready/immature compared to their peers etc., but since Kinder is free, we'll just have him repeat it next year.
Schools do not, generally, retain students on the basis of social or emotional readiness/maturity. It may be a factor when looking at a child struggling academically, but will not, in all probability, be the sole factor.
I have a student right now who, although he was born in late August, was actually 2 months premature. He has struggled since Kindergarten, not so much academically, but socially and behaviorally. This year, he is also struggling academically, as he cannot remember homework, complete assignments, or even sit next to/work with someone without bothering them. They like him, but cut him a wide swatch in the classroom, as he annoys them. I hope he makes leaps and bounds this summer, as I see him struggling to keep up (in many ways) in middle school.
There is NO hard and fast rule. NO ONE should judge another parent for delaying entry or starting their child. However, if the general advice is pointing in one direction, consider why. Remember, students are very different at school than at home.
The bold is something I really have a problem with. Now before you say, "I'm a teacher; I know" I will say that I am a now-retired pediatric nurse and know a lot about child development myself. There is a wide age range when kids become "mature" both physically and socially. How you can say that each and every "young" 10 year old is less mature than the others is beyond me.
Your attitude towards parents (they send them to K because it's free) is troubling as well. It is known that "red-shirting" occurs more in affluent kids whose parents can afford another year of pre-school, however.
By 10 the prematurity should not be an issue unless it caused some neurological problems, which it sounds like it might have with the kid you discussed. In that case, he probably needs some special services.
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