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I, personally, do not believe there are such things as bullies.
Therefore, I fail to see why the school officials should be at blame.
Hopefully this is not serious. Bullies do exist and bullying is a serious issue that can have profound impact on a child's life. Or heck, even an adult's, there are adult bullies in the workplace. I wasn't bullied in school much, but went to school with a girl who was. It was awful and there was nothing I could do, as one kid, to help- all I could do was to be friendly to her and always treat her nicely. It was very noticable, severe bullying, teachers knew about it and did nothing.
IMO, the school administration should have stepped in. They may not have been able to fix everything and make the girl fit in, but they could have punished the 2 or 3 kids who were doing the worst bullying such as running their mouths at her constantly, tripping her, embarassing her on purpose every single day, etc. Also at fault are the bullies themselves and especialy their parents. Parents, IMO, have a responsibility to teach their kids to be nice an if the kids get out of line, to straighten them out, moreso even than the school administrators- it's just that the school staff are the ones who see the bullying. I would NEVER let a child of mine participate in bullying. If they were, I'd hope a teacher would give me a call so I could deal with it. As well as hoping the teacher would step in.
I honestly don't know what the schools do about cyber bullying. I am very worried about that.
The schools should do nothing about cyber bullying except in incidents where school computers are used. Surely you don't think that a school should intervene in a neighborhood tussle that occurs off school grounds, so why should they make it their business what kids do on their home computers?
I tell you this, if anyone touches my little girl, I will call the police. It's just the start of that person's character and as a teacher and parent, I won't allow it to go further than that. If it happens again, I press charges. I was bullied in school, I was a kind, sweet girl and had no friends. Nothing was done as a result of me being beat up, gum thrown in my hair and paint being dumped in my backpack. I won't allow my child to lose out on her education because of some punks that need a good kick in the A-- .
Also another thought that I had is that in the workplace the company is responsible for ensuring a psychologically and physically safe work environment for the employees. School should be no different & if the administration cannot ensure that the children who attend their district are in a physically & psychologically safe environment then heads should roll. BTW I am not stating that the no tolerance policies or heightened penalties for aggressive children are the answer. What I am saying is that the administration needs to make more of an effort to know what is going on. If a child has psychological issues that is causing them to act out the administration needs to help that child & protect the peer group as well. Right now I don't see a whole lot of that in our schools. It seems like there is a band aid approach of punishment for the action vs. trying to discern if something bigger is going on that needs to be addressed.
Two thoughts...first I think we are expecting way too much if we expect the teachers to be able to stop the bullying. Far too much of it goes on out of sight, many times not even at school. Since the target rarely speaks up about it, the teacher often never even knows about it. It happens at the bus stop, in the hallways and on the playground and much of it is verbal instead of physical.
Second, I think the parents of the kids getting bullied need to take a greater responsibility in helping their children learn how to not be bullied or how to get it to stop if it starts. As one poster mentioned, their child is in karate and that's all it took to prevent that child from becoming a target.
I don't think some parents realize they are setting their children up to be future targets by the way they parent.
Example - I keep a little boy who could easily become a target because he is a tiny thing for his age, he is very meek and very weak physically. He will start Kindergarten this fall and I truly worry about him.
He was carried by his parents and grandparents far past the time he really needed to be. So much so that I, as his child care provider, had to literally teach him to go up and down stairs and to jump and I only have him 2 days a week.
His parents don't like going outside, so he hasn't had much opportunity other than here to be outside running, jumping and climbing. He simply cannot keep up with other kids his age because he has no strength due to not getting the chance to build it up.
He's always been babied, meaning he is treated as if his capabilities are 1-2 years younger than he really is. For instance, they thought he couldn't feed himself until he was at least 2 and were quite surprised to see my son feeding himself finger foods at 10 months of age and using spoons at 12 months of age. They thought he wasn't capable of learning his colors until he was 3. They were amazed to learn that many kids learn colors as soon as they learn to talk...typically around 18 months of age.
So this kiddo is going to start school unable to keep up with most of his peers, smaller than average and at the low end of academics on top of that. Three strikes against him going in. He does not stand up for himself now. What will he do when he's in a very large group of kids and likely intimidated by the whole situation?
All it would have taken was for them to teach him to be confident in himself, build his strength and prepare him academically and he'd be steps ahead of being a target. Sigh.
Or that could be his personality & his parents responded in kind. I don't know though. Bottom line is school administrators are responsible for providing a psychologically & physically safe environment for children to be educated. Overly aggressive children who regularly victimize another generally also have something going on that needs to be addressed instead of being ignored. It is to the benefit of all the children (including the aggressor) that these issues are addressed immediately. All of my friends have raised their children in psychologically healthy homes. None of said kids have been accused of exhibiting overly aggressive however a few have been victimized. All of the perpetrators came from homes that all the parents were aware of as being troubled...yet the administrative staff just send these kids to suspension or detention or whatever punitive measures have been established instead of counseling an obviously troubled child and dealing with the real issues. I guess that is too difficult I don't know but if they don't interfere who will?
Quote:
Originally Posted by hypocore
Two thoughts...first I think we are expecting way too much if we expect the teachers to be able to stop the bullying. Far too much of it goes on out of sight, many times not even at school. Since the target rarely speaks up about it, the teacher often never even knows about it. It happens at the bus stop, in the hallways and on the playground and much of it is verbal instead of physical.
Second, I think the parents of the kids getting bullied need to take a greater responsibility in helping their children learn how to not be bullied or how to get it to stop if it starts. As one poster mentioned, their child is in karate and that's all it took to prevent that child from becoming a target.
I don't think some parents realize they are setting their children up to be future targets by the way they parent.
Example - I keep a little boy who could easily become a target because he is a tiny thing for his age, he is very meek and very weak physically. He will start Kindergarten this fall and I truly worry about him.
He was carried by his parents and grandparents far past the time he really needed to be. So much so that I, as his child care provider, had to literally teach him to go up and down stairs and to jump and I only have him 2 days a week.
His parents don't like going outside, so he hasn't had much opportunity other than here to be outside running, jumping and climbing. He simply cannot keep up with other kids his age because he has no strength due to not getting the chance to build it up.
He's always been babied, meaning he is treated as if his capabilities are 1-2 years younger than he really is. For instance, they thought he couldn't feed himself until he was at least 2 and were quite surprised to see my son feeding himself finger foods at 10 months of age and using spoons at 12 months of age. They thought he wasn't capable of learning his colors until he was 3. They were amazed to learn that many kids learn colors as soon as they learn to talk...typically around 18 months of age.
So this kiddo is going to start school unable to keep up with most of his peers, smaller than average and at the low end of academics on top of that. Three strikes against him going in. He does not stand up for himself now. What will he do when he's in a very large group of kids and likely intimidated by the whole situation?
All it would have taken was for them to teach him to be confident in himself, build his strength and prepare him academically and he'd be steps ahead of being a target. Sigh.
"if the administration cannot ensure that the children who attend their district are in a physically & psychologically safe environment then heads should roll"
The only reason schools do something about it now, is cause they are afraid they will get sued if a child gets injured by a bully on their property. That and fallout from columbine CO in which the shooters were kids that were known to have been bullied.
Two thoughts...first I think we are expecting way too much if we expect the teachers to be able to stop the bullying. Far too much of it goes on out of sight, many times not even at school. Since the target rarely speaks up about it, the teacher often never even knows about it. It happens at the bus stop, in the hallways and on the playground and much of it is verbal instead of physical.
I do not think I expect to much from my sons teacher(s) when I intrust the safety and welfare of my child to her/him to be alert and to pay attention to what is happening when they are in their care. Just as teachers are told and asked to look for signs of child abuse from children in there class, I don't feel this is any diffrent, if they are that unaware then the board of education should teach the teachers signs to watch out for, just for the simple fact some kids being bullied are to scared to speak up. More awareness can help stop and even prevent some.
Second, I think the parents of the kids getting bullied need to take a greater responsibility in helping their children learn how to not be bullied or how to get it to stop if it starts. As one poster mentioned, their child is in karate and that's all it took to prevent that child from becoming a target.
I agree also that parents of bullied kids should teach their kids how to protect themselfs, BUT there are kids that are simply shy, non aggressive, and simply unable mentally or physically to protect themself. Not everyone can afford to teach their child karate.
I don't think some parents realize they are setting their children up to be future targets by the way they parent.
Example - I keep a little boy who could easily become a target because he is a tiny thing for his age, he is very meek and very weak physically. He will start Kindergarten this fall and I truly worry about him.
He was carried by his parents and grandparents far past the time he really needed to be. So much so that I, as his child care provider, had to literally teach him to go up and down stairs and to jump and I only have him 2 days a week.
His parents don't like going outside, so he hasn't had much opportunity other than here to be outside running, jumping and climbing. He simply cannot keep up with other kids his age because he has no strength due to not getting the chance to build it up.
He's always been babied, meaning he is treated as if his capabilities are 1-2 years younger than he really is. For instance, they thought he couldn't feed himself until he was at least 2 and were quite surprised to see my son feeding himself finger foods at 10 months of age and using spoons at 12 months of age. They thought he wasn't capable of learning his colors until he was 3. They were amazed to learn that many kids learn colors as soon as they learn to talk...typically around 18 months of age.
So this kiddo is going to start school unable to keep up with most of his peers, smaller than average and at the low end of academics on top of that. Three strikes against him going in. He does not stand up for himself now. What will he do when he's in a very large group of kids and likely intimidated by the whole situation?
All it would have taken was for them to teach him to be confident in himself, build his strength and prepare him academically and he'd be steps ahead of being a target. Sigh.
I truely see your point here and I agree 100% with you that the parents should be preparing him mentally and physically to interact with his peers. I can see him being a target too and that is sad. This is something someone should make the parents aware of even if it makes them mad. This is also one of the case I speak of when I say the teachers should pay paticular attention and be aware of any bulling this child might endure until he has time to adjust and find his place. Its very apparent he will stand out, but should not have to pay for his parents mistake.
They should get sued if they don't keep the children safe. If I am not kept safe in the workplace, my employer would also be sued. It is called being held responsible for your actions.
ETA - Columbine should never have happened. The children that were being victimized should have been helped/counseled and the peers who were participating in victimizing these kids should have been stopped. Administrators all too often take the easy way out when it comes to dealing with these issues. It seems the only way they do anything is if they are afraid of the personal repercussions of their inactions.
Quote:
Originally Posted by gardener34
"if the administration cannot ensure that the children who attend their district are in a physically & psychologically safe environment then heads should roll"
The only reason schools do something about it now, is cause they are afraid they will get sued if a child gets injured by a bully on their property. That and fallout from columbine CO in which the shooters were kids that were known to have been bullied.
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Bullies do exist and bullying is a serious issue that can have profound impact on a child's life. Or heck, even an adult's, there are adult bullies in the workplace. I wasn't bullied in school much, but went to school with a girl who was. It was awful and there was nothing I could do, as one kid, to help- all I could do was to be friendly to her and always treat her nicely. It was very noticable, severe bullying, teachers knew about it and did nothing. 
