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Old Today, 03:33 AM
 
393 posts, read 102,779 times
Reputation: 1369

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OP, I think there is a tool that can address this problem in a quick and easy manner, it is called an "eraser", and can usually be found on the end of a pencil. If it was drawn in ink, there is a thing called "Whiteout".

Am I the only Caveman here who thinks this has been blown completely out of proportion? When I was in 7th grade, I would have been told to "Knock that bs off" and maybe be ordered to apologize, and if I did, that would have been the end of it. Now, people expect a legal hearing, psychiatric evaluation for both parties, a lawsuit to hold the school responsible, and lifetime compensation for the victim, because a 12 year old boy drew a John Thomas on one of a female peer's books? Are we all such delicate snowflakes now such that SHE couldn't have simply told the kid to knock it off? What exactly is the message to the girl, here? I do not condone bullying, but think this has already gotten farther than it should have. No wonder this country is getting so F'd up.
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Old Today, 07:51 AM
 
Location: Beautiful Rhode Island
6,451 posts, read 10,721,620 times
Reputation: 6274
Quote:
Originally Posted by hope2settle View Post
Hi Parents,


A boy drew genital man to my girl text book. My girl(grade 7) report it to teacher. The principal call me about the situation and said proper standard procedure has been taken to the boy.
I donít ask many questions during he call me because I believe the principal from this middle school that rank no.1 in this district will do his job properly.


No e-mail/ mail from teacher/ principal regarding this situation.
Weeks past, the boy still attend same class with my girl. I wonder what is the proper standard procedure/s has been taken to the boy.
1 of my expectation is, the boy have to not in same home room any more with my girl.
My other expectation is a formal e-mail/ mail about the incident.


I appreciate Parents who have girl could share neutral and honest opinion if this unpleasant incident happen to your girl.
Thanks in advance for any reply.
The boy probably likes your girl because doing silly things to get a girl's attention is what young boys do. Boys act younger than girls at every age until they're grown (and some say long after that!).

I agree with Curly Q- start teaching your girl how to handle male advances in no uncertain way and don't try to solve all her problems. She'll never become competent in the world if you do that.

Unless your daughter is continuing to complain to you about him, leave it to the school authorities. Did you make promises to her you couldn't keep, like "that boy will be taken out of class"? If they said they were going to handle it, they likely have. This kind of teasing is probably routine for them. Don't make a mountain out of a molehill.

And if you haven't already given her some sex education, you're long overdue given her age. The sight of male genitals should not come as a surprise to her.

I realize that your writing indicates you are foreign born, so forgive me if this does not match your cultural expectations.
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Old Today, 07:58 AM
 
4,183 posts, read 1,802,383 times
Reputation: 11649
Quote:
Originally Posted by Curly Q. Bobalink View Post
OP, I think there is a tool that can address this problem in a quick and easy manner, it is called an "eraser", and can usually be found on the end of a pencil. If it was drawn in ink, there is a thing called "Whiteout".

Am I the only Caveman here who thinks this has been blown completely out of proportion? When I was in 7th grade, I would have been told to "Knock that bs off" and maybe be ordered to apologize, and if I did, that would have been the end of it. Now, people expect a legal hearing, psychiatric evaluation for both parties, a lawsuit to hold the school responsible, and lifetime compensation for the victim, because a 12 year old boy drew a John Thomas on one of a female peer's books? Are we all such delicate snowflakes now such that SHE couldn't have simply told the kid to knock it off? What exactly is the message to the girl, here? I do not condone bullying, but think this has already gotten farther than it should have. No wonder this country is getting so F'd up.
No, you are not the only one who thinks these kinds of things are blown out of proportion, but common sense, rare at the best of times, has now been COMPLETELY thrown out the window.


Maybe the offender should be sentenced to 20 years of solitary confinement?


or, maybe, just an ordinary spanking followed with "don't do that any more"?
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Old Today, 08:02 AM
 
Location: Nescopeck, Penna. (birthplace)
11,717 posts, read 7,089,139 times
Reputation: 15185
Kudos to all of the three previous posters!

To our OP; our media-dominated culture seems intent on turning our daily lives into something where we all feel powerless and overwhelmed; please don't let them do this to you!

Most of us who came here, or our ancestors, came for a better life; you can't get that if you're asking to be "protected" from everything you (and everyone else) might be upset about.

Use your freedom, but use it wisely.

Last edited by 2nd trick op; Today at 08:11 AM..
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Old Today, 08:07 AM
 
4,683 posts, read 1,982,896 times
Reputation: 13275
Quote:
Originally Posted by Curly Q. Bobalink View Post
OP, I think there is a tool that can address this problem in a quick and easy manner, it is called an "eraser", and can usually be found on the end of a pencil. If it was drawn in ink, there is a thing called "Whiteout".

Am I the only Caveman here who thinks this has been blown completely out of proportion? When I was in 7th grade, I would have been told to "Knock that bs off" and maybe be ordered to apologize, and if I did, that would have been the end of it. Now, people expect a legal hearing, psychiatric evaluation for both parties, a lawsuit to hold the school responsible, and lifetime compensation for the victim, because a 12 year old boy drew a John Thomas on one of a female peer's books? Are we all such delicate snowflakes now such that SHE couldn't have simply told the kid to knock it off? What exactly is the message to the girl, here? I do not condone bullying, but think this has already gotten farther than it should have. No wonder this country is getting so F'd up.
Clearly, I'm a cave woman too. A lawyer and a psych eval???


I'd be more worried about my own spelling and grammar. How do you explain the "genital man" to the principal??
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Old Today, 08:14 AM
 
50,011 posts, read 40,430,122 times
Reputation: 31380
OP, if you really want her to be completely sheltered from the real world then I'd recommend home schooling.

Please note, I'm not talking about serious issues like many have mentioned that would involve assault, bullying etc. but just stupid kid things like that drawing.

If you make a huge deal out of minor things to young kids it can make them learn to process minor things as huge deals and can be crippling when they venture out into the real world and have to deal with a problematic customer or boss, the neighbor with the barking dog, a test score lower than desired and so on and so forth.

I have a some relatives that took the path you are on and their kids are not even remotely independent. Maybe that's what you want but don't complain when you're still paying their bills when they're 30.
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Old Today, 09:05 AM
 
Location: Winterpeg
742 posts, read 270,818 times
Reputation: 3114
If the only issue with the boy is the drawing, you are way over-reacting. And like the previous poster said, your daughter is learning from you how to react to things. If you demand any kid that ever does anything gross and stupid around her be removed from her life, she will be at home alone with you.

If there are other issues about this boy, or any other kid in the class, bullying or harassing your daughter, that's different. Are there other worries?
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Old Today, 10:11 AM
 
52 posts, read 18,914 times
Reputation: 31
hi everyone,
thanks for your all constructive opinion.
i hope this discussion will help/ give idea to other that might have similar situation, what is an appropriate follow up after the incident or maybe if it is a need for follow up.
since i like do things in order sequence, maybe let i do same thing in here:
1. a boy draw human male genital organ on my girl text book. my girl report it to teacher and teacher ask bring it to principal.
if it is a blown COMPLETELY out of proportion or kind of teasing or just need "eraser", why this teacher that teach for 16 years in this middle school bother to sent the text book to principal?

if it is a blown COMPLETELY out of proportion or kind of teasing or just need "eraser", why the principal bother to call me and replace the page of the drawing?




2. i don't know how high your all education, career and workplace. but in my job position, i can't afford do something tiny mistake without big/ terminal consequence within days.

i choose this middle school because of the best in district/ region. i sacrifice a lot move specifically to this district to hope get best education for my kids and have high respect the principal and teacher do his job ethically and professionally. it is well know, best school always placed in most expensive place to live in region.
i understand completely the principal busy so forget about this blown COMPLETELY out of proportion or kind of teasing or just need "eraser", but over 4 weeks, what i got for highest tax school in region , principal only give a call?

i asked my girl, how's she feeling to be same class with the boy, she said, not comfortable.

there is no sop in this rank no.1 middle school for 4 years in row?

seriously? no standard operation procedure manual for communication for this blown COMPLETELY out of proportion or kind of teasing or just need "eraser"?




3. i never have intention go after this boy or the principal. i just want a fair treatment.

if from young already have a not fair treatment, how to have a dream of better life in future?

if in this kind of so called best of possible school i can get for my kids, the treatment for blown COMPLETELY out of proportion or kind of teasing or just need "eraser" just like this, what about the normal and below normal school?

again i completely don't understand if it is an innocent or funny or naughty, harmless thing, prepared for not completely sheltered from the real world, why the principal bother to tear the text book page and replace with the new page?
it is innocent.

it is funny or naughty.

it is harmless thing.

it is prepared for not completely sheltered from the real world.

why the teacher ask my girl bring it to principal?
to remind everyone, it is not a woman fault if a woman dress sexily and she got raped.

fyi, my girl wear glasses, short hair, book worm type, normal fully jeans everyday. so... where is the connection of innocent or funny or naughty or harmless thing or prepared for not completely sheltered from the real world?




4. i remotely consult my company legal dept about this blown COMPLETELY out of proportion or kind of teasing or just need "eraser". yes, there is possibility because local born boy did something to
foreign born girl. if the foreign born boy draw something to local born girl, it is already in local newspaper/ tv.

seriously? already in 2019, we still have this kind situation?

i could say a principal from best middle school in region is like a ceo of 500-750 million net income corporate class. he should be free and 100% old and wise enough to know from this kind local/ foreign born student issue.

this one of the reason i still have not meet him, to make sure i have something black and white, big, a law, easy understand for him like 1+1=2 chart, so he don't give billions reason and treat me like i spend my kindergarten 20 years first before i have all 4 PhD from usa top 8 universities





5. yes, the 5th. if point no. 1 the principal settle it in professional, no one will say
blown COMPLETELY out of proportion or kind of teasing or just need "eraser".
so should i focus:
why the boy still in my girl classes?

or

why the teacher ask my girl bring the text book to principal?

or
why the principal tear the text book page and replace with the new page?




even online discussion like this forums is not a place for real deal discussion, i hope everyone could give neutral and sincere opinion for benefit others than focus spelling, grammar or foreign/ local born.
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Old Today, 10:30 AM
 
Location: Northern Virginia
4,859 posts, read 5,060,389 times
Reputation: 11722
Quote:
Originally Posted by hope2settle View Post
A boy drew genital man to my girl text book. My girl(grade 7) report it to teacher. The principal call me about the situation and said proper standard procedure has been taken to the boy.
IMO, as long as this was a one time thing, it was the appropriate way to handle the situation.

It is probably school policy that they cannot share with you what disciplinary actions were taken against the boy. But this is probably what happened: student was spoken to and warned, parents of student were notified.

If his parents are decent parents, they will also have a talk with him and give him some type of punishment or "grounding" at home.
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Old Today, 10:31 AM
 
4,183 posts, read 1,802,383 times
Reputation: 11649
I think you will find that almost everyone here recognized that English is not your primary language and ignored that. A couple did not, and their rudeness is irrelevant to this discussion.

You clearly have not been around very many pre-teens if you are surprised at this behavior.

I stand by my statement that you are taking a typical crass crude middle school boy's misbehavior and trying to turn it into a far bigger deal than it is.

Middle school boys have been writing nasty things on walls or other places for as long as they have existed.
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