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My son is in 5th grade at a K-8 charter school, and we are trying to decide if he will be better off staying where he is for 6th grade in the fall, or switching to the junior HS, which starts at grade 6.
My son has experienced a lot of bullying at the school (verbal), which is the primary reason we are looking into our options (kids join in, even his friends sometimes). It is not so much that the kids or the school are bad in this sense, it's just that there are only 19 other boys in his grade (48 kids in each grade), which does not give him that many friend choices or ways to avoid the bully types (he had more friends early on, however, many kids he started with left over the years for one reason or another).
Our reasons for staying would be because we already know the school and like it overall, the 6th grade teachers seem pretty good, our other son (younger) is at the school and likes it, the administrators are responsive to bullying issues (although it took awhile), my son is worried about switching (the devil you know kind of a thing), he has a few good friends, and the 6-8 graders seem to be a little less grown up (in a good way) than the 6-8 graders at the Jr high school.
The Jr. HS is a bigger school, which is good in the sense that my son would have more choices for friends, but maybe not so good if there is more chance for bully types. The Jr. high school seems to acknowledge bullying (in general), more than our school (mentioned right on their website). My son would not be coming in with a lot of friends, which could be tough, however, he will know a few kids from town sports. The school does not have recess for the 6th graders, which my son would not like, however, they get out of school earlier than the charter school. Also, my son would get a fresh start, and the school has more after school sports, and possibly less HW, which is good.
If we are going to switch, we are better of switching for this upcoming school year, or waiting until HS when he has to switch anyway (and he would be one of the only ones at that point too). Also, there is really no turning back if we do switch.
Does anyone have experience switching their kids to a bigger school (when the kids were roughly Jr. high school age)? Thoughts?
We ran into this situation when we moved from a rural NE area where the elementary school had 400 students in grades K-8, to SE Florida, where the middle school had over 2000 in 6-8. We weren't sure how our kids would handle it, so at first we tried the private school route. That wasn't the answer, because the kids weren't meeting any kids in the neighborhood.
With trepidation, we moved them to the middle school, and they thrived there. The gifted student was put into challenging classes that he never would have gotten in the small school, because there wasn't enough of a demand for them. The other boy, with an IEP, was assigned a terrific child study team, who made sure his needs were being met.
Both boys had plenty of extra-curriculars to choose from that were not available in the smaller school.
It was very nice knowing everybody in the school before we moved. But, there were instances of minor bullying in both settings. The difference was, in the big school, it was easier to avoid the trouble makers. We moved again before either boy started high school, but by the time we did, they handled the large student body with ease.
One other thing to consider, is that in a middle school (or Jr. high) setting, the staff is usually pretty competent to handle that age groups. In the small K-8 school, the older students were treated as just bigger versions of the younger ones.
My own son is still too young for this, so this is coming purely from personal experience myself. I attended a fairly small K-6 elementary school. When I got to 6th grade they added a 7th and 8th grade. Rather than attend the junior high, I (and only a couple of other students) decided to switch to the more traditional and much larger separate junior high. I never had problems with bullies, so that wasn't an issue. I did, however, have to make all new friends. In the bigger school there was less of a sense of an overall shared community, but it didn't take long to carve out a smaller niche within the overall student body. There were more course options there, including more language and advanced classes (part of the reason I chose to move). Overall it was a nice transition to high school, and I never recall wishing I had chosen the other school (much as I loved that school, the teachers, and my friends there).
Does your son have a strong opinion? I don't remember what role I had and what role my parents had in choosing to switch to the big junior high; I think we both agreed that it was the right choice. It sounds like in his case a fresh start might well be the way to go, given that he's had to deal with some bullying and sounds like he could benefit from an expanded pool of potential friends.
My own son is still too young for this, so this is coming purely from personal experience myself. I attended a fairly small K-6 elementary school. When I got to 6th grade they added a 7th and 8th grade. Rather than attend the junior high, I (and only a couple of other students) decided to switch to the more traditional and much larger separate junior high. I never had problems with bullies, so that wasn't an issue. I did, however, have to make all new friends. In the bigger school there was less of a sense of an overall shared community, but it didn't take long to carve out a smaller niche within the overall student body. There were more course options there, including more language and advanced classes (part of the reason I chose to move). Overall it was a nice transition to high school, and I never recall wishing I had chosen the other school (much as I loved that school, the teachers, and my friends there).
Does your son have a strong opinion? I don't remember what role I had and what role my parents had in choosing to switch to the big junior high; I think we both agreed that it was the right choice. It sounds like in his case a fresh start might well be the way to go, given that he's had to deal with some bullying and sounds like he could benefit from an expanded pool of potential friends.
My son is scared to switch schools, but he seems interested in the possibility of switching. The principal of the Jr. High is giving us a tour on Tuesday, so my son may have stronger opinions after learning more (my son has a list of questions.....how much gym do kids get and is it real gym or health class, how much HW, and how do detentions work.....lol).
Thanks to both of you for your posts. My gut feeling is that bigger would be better for my son. I should have a better idea soon.
I went from a one room schoolhouse to a public high school for my senior year. I LOVED it.
Your situation is not unusual. Kids fall into certain roles within their peer group, there is a pecking order, and when they have been together a long time it's sometimes impossible to change things. I've known many kids to switch schools just to break away from that and find new friends and groups who see them in a whole new way. It's usually a positive thing, especially if the school is a good one.
Does anyone have experience switching their kids to a bigger school (when the kids were roughly Jr. high school age)? Thoughts?
I switched my girls last year from a Catholic school to the closer, bigger, brand new public school.
The public school is much LESS tolerant of bullying, troublemakers than the private school.
My girls love the new school, going from about 75 (6,7,8 grades) kids to over 400.
They didn't really have any problems with the kids in the private school, although there was a few very nasty girls in the 7th grade class, and they say that all the kids in their respective grade levels are nice, that everyone pretty much gets along, which is the exact opposite of what I would have expected.
I switched my girls last year from a Catholic school to the closer, bigger, brand new public school.
The public school is much LESS tolerant of bullying, troublemakers than the private school.
My girls love the new school, going from about 75 (6,7,8 grades) kids to over 400.
They didn't really have any problems with the kids in the private school, although there was a few very nasty girls in the 7th grade class, and they say that all the kids in their respective grade levels are nice, that everyone pretty much gets along, which is the exact opposite of what I would have expected.
That's great that your change went well. I think our new school will be less tolerant of bullying too. Plus, having more choices of friends and lunch tables will make it easier in some ways too.
The school my son is in now has not taken situations seriously, and there is no mention of bullying on the website. The new school has information about bullying on a main page of their website, and the Principal sounds like he takes it seriously (I've heard that he tells parents that he was bullied, so he does not tolerate it). My son's grade also seems to have a clickier, less friendly group of kids than some other grades.
Hopefully our experience is similar to yours! I know I liked bigger schools better.
I will say though that the Catholic school was probably teaching one grade higher in science and math than the public.
My oldest,who just graduated 8th at the public school, had taken pre-algebra in 7th grade at the Catholic school. Initially, the public school had her scheduled for pre-alg for 8th grade, but she took an assessment test and they placed her in Alg I, which she aced.
I will say the district we are in and especially this particular school are really quite strict in terms of bullying, behavior, smart-alecs and the like.
I would say that if you are going to switch, do it now, don't wait until high school. We moved to a new city while our sons were in junior high, one was in his second year, the other in his first, and they did fine. They found new friends pretty quickly and it didn't take long until they felt at home. Unfortunately, we moved again when they were both in high school. What they both found was that it was much more difficult to make friends with other boys by that time. They made friends with girls, but very few boys. I guess all the testosterone had kicked in by then, and the other boys saw them as competition rather than a chance at a new friend. Both my boys, put especially the oldest, just couldn't wait to graduate and move off to college where he could just start over. They have both told me that it has been so nice being in college where they actually have guy friends again.
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