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I know this is similar to the other thread about 'eating more and working out more to compensate' thread a while back, this is one is more of pet peeve about unsolicited diet and fitness advice and nutrition.
I have a roommate who is obese for her size (we are around the same height 5'4) and I notice she likes to comment and bring up a lot about nutrition and diet to me since she notices I go to the gym all the time and workout and watches what I cook. She tells me she wants to lose weight and recently started a low fat/low carb diet to help her lose weight, and has been walking as her choice of exercise since she is a bigger woman.
Anyways, I personally don't like or follow those types of diets because I find them to be a fad diet that most people don't have long lasting results from or can stick to once they managed to drop the weight. I have noticed she always tries to chime in her two cents whenever she sees me making food, about what I eat (I eat a flexible dieting approach and keep it mostly whole foods for my main meals with some snacks in there and keep it at a deficit until the end of my cut) and says little quips like how she watched an episode of a show about a girl who had a diet high in fiber and protein that got scurvy, etc. and other pestering comments like that. At first I thought her 'concerns' were sincere, but now it seems like she says them in a way to make herself feel better about what she is doing and ingenuine. She also has asked me if I wanted to drink and smoke with her a few times to which I said no because I don't smoke, and only drink on occasions.
I know this may sound wrong but, I don't think she is in a place to comment on my approach to diet and fitness, when looking at her own choices. Especially since she is following fad diets herself, she drinks 'slimming teas' and herbal drinks (such as V8 green teas) as the main source for daily vitamins, and is smokes all the time, drinks more than I personally like to, her size, etc. She keeps offering me her 'weightloss' teas and drinks and snacks to me, which I refuse because I have my own food I prefer. I do not comment or give unwanted advice to her on her dieting choices, food, weight, or exercise since I hate soliciting people about what they choose to do. It bothers me when people comment about what I am doing so I try not to bother others about their own choices, etc. As long as what is working for her is working, that's all that matters.
Lately, it's just been getting to me to the point where she is subtly suggesting that she is more health conscious than I am, has a better grasp at nutrition and dieting, and knows more about exercise than me due to her constantly comparing of what she does and then makes snide comments about what I am doing, as if I am doing it the 'wrong way'. I guess this is my rant about it since she has been pestering me about it that I try to avoid any type of talks with her about it.
Does this bother anyone else or anyone else have this same problem? Once again, sorry if this subject is very similar to the one made a few weeks back
I'm fortune I live alone, if I didn't, and had a roommate similar to yours...I could really care less about what that person said about my diet. I'd tell that person 'I appreciate the advise, but worry about you ,and I'll worry about me'.
Well, I'm sure your roomie means well, and she probably is a little jealous of the fact you are more fit than she is. And I can understand how unsolicited and constant advice and criticism from a far less-fit person can be annoying.
To me, when it comes to fitness: the proof is in the pudding! That means, how good I look and feel and how fit I am compared to somebody else who wants to argue fitness or nutritional issues. I have a friend similar to yours, less fit than me, and always telling me what not to eat and what supplements I need to take. He is about 30 lbs. overweight. I am if anything thin for my height and run marathons.
So what I do when he gets on my nerves, and what you might try is this: next time tubby tells you what you're doing wrong or eating wrong, give a not-so-subtle once over to her with your eyes, looking up and down her body, then at yours. Maybe pat your belly, and say something like, "Hmm..I dunno. Seems to be working OK for me!"
This usually shuts my friend up. Well, at least for awhile. Or you can always do something else I do, which is say something like, "Yeah, OK. Hey, ya wanna go for a nice little 10 mile run?" (or whatever personal equivalent exercise you have that you know you are superior to her in doing.)
This advice might sound a bit mean to some, but hey, you are not saying these things unbidden. You're not starting it, and raising the issue of fitness and diet. She is. So she should, especially given her less-than-fit physique, expect to encounter a bit of skepticism or doubt when she offers spurious advice.
To me, when it comes to fitness: the proof is in the pudding! That means, how good I look and feel and how fit I am compared to somebody else who wants to argue fitness or nutritional issues. I have a friend similar to yours, less fit than me, and always telling me what not to eat and what supplements I need to take. He is about 30 lbs. overweight. I am if anything thin for my height and run marathons.
I might agree with this but I can't because I am very close to a person who may not look like the most fit woman, but can run circles around most men and women in terms of technique and nutrition. My wife has struggled with weight ever since having babies. She has to take medication for her thyroid. She can undo weeks worth of discipline in one meal: her margin for error is non-existent. And yet, because she knows this about herself she studies more than most and has researched a lot of good training techniques. And while she's had a some setbacks since achieving over 120* pounds of weight loss, she's shown a lot of perseverance in getting her feet back underneath her and righting the ship. Again. Now someone who doesn't know what they're doing couldn't achieve the results she's achieved. And she's done it without any silly fad diets or workouts. She has done it the old fashion way: hard work and discipline. And because she has researched so many techniques, she has actually given me tips that have helped a lot. I'm more naturally gifted than she is but because it has come so easily to me, I've not had to put the amount of reading/research into it as her.
*My wife's weight loss is just one of many reasons I so adamantly oppose fat shaming, which has been discussed at great lengths elsewhere on CD. Even after dropping that weight she had a long way to go and the subject of weight related insults periodically. Nobody who made those insults knew the amount of hard work and dedication she had behind her to get there. It was probably more than most of the fat shamers who like to run their (0(k holsters, though. Her effort to ability ratio likely far surpasses most people. I guess we don't have a way to prove it but I'd gladly pit her against a lot of people who APPEAR more knowledgeable than she based on body type alone.
I might agree with this but I can't because I am very close to a person who may not look like the most fit woman, but can run circles around most men and women in terms of technique and nutrition. My wife has struggled with weight ever since having babies. She has to take medication for her thyroid. She can undo weeks worth of discipline in one meal: her margin for error is non-existent. And yet, because she knows this about herself she studies more than most and has researched a lot of good training techniques. And while she's had a some setbacks since achieving over 120* pounds of weight loss, she's shown a lot of perseverance in getting her feet back underneath her and righting the ship. Again. Now someone who doesn't know what they're doing couldn't achieve the results she's achieved. And she's done it without any silly fad diets or workouts. She has done it the old fashion way: hard work and discipline. And because she has researched so many techniques, she has actually given me tips that have helped a lot. I'm more naturally gifted than she is but because it has come so easily to me, I've not had to put the amount of reading/research into it as her.
*My wife's weight loss is just one of many reasons I so adamantly oppose fat shaming, which has been discussed at great lengths elsewhere on CD. Even after dropping that weight she had a long way to go and the subject of weight related insults periodically. Nobody who made those insults knew the amount of hard work and dedication she had behind her to get there. It was probably more than most of the fat shamers who like to run their (0(k holsters, though. Her effort to ability ratio likely far surpasses most people. I guess we don't have a way to prove it but I'd gladly pit her against a lot of people who APPEAR more knowledgeable than she based on body type alone.
Thats nice to read about your wife. If only my roommate can take notes from her and do what she does and not what she is currently doing to me, I would appreciate it a lot more. I'm not here to shame her, I'm more concerned about the reasons why she is going after me like this (we have other roommates and she never talks to them the same way from what I have observed), when I never bother or say anything to her about her diet or fitness. She is the instigator in this thing, and I am just doing my own thing, minding my own business.
Thats nice to read about your wife. If only my roommate can take notes from her and do what she does and not what she is currently doing to me, I would appreciate it a lot more. I'm not here to shame her, I'm more concerned about the reasons why she is going after me like this (we have other roommates and she never talks to them the same way from what I have observed), when I never bother or say anything to her about her diet or fitness. She is the instigator in this thing, and I am just doing my own thing, minding my own business.
^ I totally get it. I'm in very good shape and there have been times when a person who's heavy set has (forgive me) weighed in with unsolicited advice or in some cases derided the approach I take. It's always unwelcome and if the person appears to be out of shape it sort of adds an element of "really?" to it. The key is this: You know your roommate. You know her habits and that yours are superior. The times I've reacted similarly to you have involved people I knew as well. That's different than someone random just blurting out unsolicited advice. In that case my objection is with the unsolicited advice though, not the physical condition of the messenger.
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