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Old 07-07-2010, 09:06 AM
 
Location: Canada
3,432 posts, read 3,266,661 times
Reputation: 2186

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Looking for opinions. Do you think a bridesmaid should have any say in the bridesmaid's dress or should they just wear the dress the bride picked and be quiet. I feel its the bride's day and it should be all about her and that means she gets to choose the dress.

Last edited by KylieEve; 07-07-2010 at 09:38 AM.. Reason: .

 
Old 07-07-2010, 09:12 AM
 
Location: Denver area
21,137 posts, read 22,107,592 times
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In the end, it is the bride's day BUT, a thoughtful friend (and bride) will take the opinions on the bridesmaids into consideration. The idea that friends should "shut the heck up" is a little offensive IMO....after all, they are the ones who have to wear (and perhaps pay) for the dress...their opinion should be important....

BTW - it is also the groom's day and a day for sharing happiness with friends and family - "shut the heck up" doesn't seem an appropriate attitude...
 
Old 07-07-2010, 09:21 AM
 
Location: Canada
3,432 posts, read 3,266,661 times
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When I was a bridesmaid I wore a hideous fuschia dress with a bolero and tulle in my hair. My hair was made into a bow in the back and two pieces of tull were tucked in. I looked like Minnie Mouse. Still I kept quiet and just wore the hideous dress.
My sister in law who is obese bi***** about the dress I chose, says she needed a bolero made to cover her arms. Mind you, there was a very large shawl that came with the dress which would have covered her arms. When I asked her to be a bridesmaid she said she wanted to be the MC instead?

Last edited by KylieEve; 07-07-2010 at 09:22 AM.. Reason: .
 
Old 07-07-2010, 09:26 AM
 
Location: Denver area
21,137 posts, read 22,107,592 times
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So why insist she be a bridesmaid and wear a dress she obviously feels self conscious in?

You may have worn an ugly dress (who hasn't?) but it doesn't mean it isn't a nice thing to ask opinions. Frankly, I've been to several weddings that had the bridesmaids wear differently styled dresses (that were suited to each body type) of the same fabric - or even ones where the bride basically said "wear a black dress you like". The weddings were lovely, happy events not simply photo-ops.
 
Old 07-07-2010, 09:35 AM
 
Location: southwestern PA
20,426 posts, read 35,707,564 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by maciesmom View Post
In the end, it is the bride's day BUT, a thoughtful friend (and bride) will take the opinions on the bridesmaids into consideration.

BTW - it is also the groom's day and a day for sharing happiness with friends and family - "shut the heck up" doesn't seem an appropriate attitude...
Very nicely put!
 
Old 07-07-2010, 09:52 AM
 
2,065 posts, read 4,036,034 times
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Imo, it is the bride's day. If you are a true friend, you can put up with wearing an ugly bridesmaid dress (if it is an ugly one) for a day.

But if you are a very, very good and close friend, and only if you are, you may make a suggestion or politely say some other color or style would look better, for example. Ultimately, do what the bride asks, it is her day...

I would wear what my friend asked me and not really fret about it.

With that said, some brides have an attitude and sometimes push it a bit too much... I was adamant about certain things when I got married, but mostly I was very easy-going. I was adamant about the cake, the food served, and about my dress for example, but other people's clothing did not really bother/concern me. If you are a nice bride, listen to your friends, they want to share your special day with you looking their best too.

Slightly off-topic, but as important: invite people who matter to you and have a wonderful wedding day.
 
Old 07-07-2010, 09:56 AM
 
Location: Denver area
21,137 posts, read 22,107,592 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lisalan View Post
Looking for opinions. Do you think a bridesmaid should have any say in the bridesmaid's dress or should they just wear the dress the bride picked and be quiet. I feel its the bride's day and it should be all about her and that means she gets to choose the dress.

That does sound better than "shut the heck up" ...but I still think it's nice to want all your guests (including bridesmaids - they are still your guests) to be happy to be there and feeling their best. (also - it's a good thing to not p*** off the people who will be holding your dress when you have to use the restroom later that day )
 
Old 07-07-2010, 09:58 AM
 
Location: Denver area
21,137 posts, read 22,107,592 times
Reputation: 35503
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miaiam View Post
Imo, it is the bride's day. If you are a true friend, you can put up with wearing an ugly bridesmaid dress (if it is an ugly one) for a day.

But if you are a very, very good and close friend, and only if you are, you may make a suggestion or politely say some other color or style would look better, for example. Ultimately, do what the bride asks, it is her day...

I would wear what my friend asked me and not really fret about it.
Of course...as would I, but I still think a thoughtful person would ask the bridesmaids opinion...JMO though....
 
Old 07-07-2010, 10:02 AM
 
Location: Canada
3,432 posts, read 3,266,661 times
Reputation: 2186
Quote:
Originally Posted by Miaiam View Post
Imo, it is the bride's day. If you are a true friend, you can put up with wearing an ugly bridesmaid dress (if it is an ugly one) for a day.

But if you are a very, very good and close friend, and only if you are, you may make a suggestion or politely say some other color or style would look better, for example. Ultimately, do what the bride asks, it is her day...

I would wear what my friend asked me and not really fret about it.

With that said, some brides have an attitude and sometimes push it a bit too much... I was adamant about certain things when I got married, but mostly I was very easy-going. I was adamant about the cake, the food served, and about my dress for example, but other people's clothing did not really bother/concern me. If you are a nice bride, listen to your friends, they want to share your special day with you looking their best too.

Slightly off-topic, but as important: invite people who matter to you and have a wonderful wedding day.

Exactly!
 
Old 07-07-2010, 11:44 AM
 
454 posts, read 914,095 times
Reputation: 527
I think a bridesmaid should be supportive of the bride and only give her input when asked but I also think a bride should be thoughtful in her choice of bridesmaids dresses and consider her bridesmaids' opinions.
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