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I was so beautiful and had a great body and was always the center of attention.
LOL, I want to sympathize, but that description of yourself is pretty funny. I don't typically hear people talk about themselves that way, even in the past tense.
If you take care of yourself with diet and exercise you need a lot less product to fix things.
Some "free" list suggestions:
- drink water and only water, cut caffeine and sugars - this will help your skin clear and is good for weight loss
- google: spark people diet - free exercise plans and dietary guidance to get your weight back in check
- think about why you got depressed, why you got into a relationship where you had to compromise so much and willingly did so.
- google home remedies for skin or hair problems you are having
- scrapbook some new clothing pics you would like to wear again
Worth it lux list:
- skin care - just spend the money on a derm doctor and have them help you figure out the perfect product for your issues. It could be something high end or a drug store bargain you just have not tried.
- shampoo/conditioner - Not everything costly is great but the stuff thats is great can not be matched in the drug store. When you improve your diet, your hair will be nicer too.
- fix your teeth- you only get one set. Chips can tend to have cracks with them too so its good to have it checked out just to make sure its not going to crack off and be a painful problem. Small chips are easy to fix.
I think ANYONE who is having a good day in the looks department is in a better mood and vice versa. I don't think it will solve all your problems of course but at least you will look good when you get to that part!
Put the money towards a therapist and a personal trainer.
Get rid of all the junk and start eating healthy again.
Health is the most important, and luckily, eating well and exercising will also improve your skin!!
Ditto on the drinking plenty of water. You need to keep your body hydrated and the toxins flushed out. Get out in the sunshine for at least 15 minutes a day because a lack of Vitamin D will make you feel depressed. If you don't like walking for exercise (I know I don't!), dance around in your house and then go lay out in a hammock or lounge chair in the sunshine afterwards so you get the endorphin & Vit. D hit. If that doesn't sound appealing, get a job as a mid-day dog walker. Get paid to walk, and with the money you earn, get your tooth fixed. You will always feel more self-confident if you know your smile is in good shape.
It does sound like you have some depression going on, and it also sounds like a lot of your self-confidence is tied to your physical appearance. Developing more confidence in other abilities will help boost your self-esteem. Helping others is a great way to pull yourself out of a funk.
Two years ago I was single, independent, happy, and gorgeous. Two years ago I met what is now my ex boyfriend. I met him at a coffee shop and we immediately started dating. Back then I was going to the spa every week, buying expensive cosmetic products and was extremely high maintenance. This ex boyfriend was the first guy I have ever dated and things quickly moved forward and I ended up moving in with him. Unfortunately, he did not approve of going to the spa or buying high-end cosmetics or even having nice clothing. I loved this man and felt as though as long as he loved me then that's all that mattered. I became depressed and started eating junk and gained well over 70lbs. Before we met I weighed 130. I'm 5'10". I started to care less about myself and some days didn't even wash my face, comb my hair or brush my teeth. I was just lost. Well, anyway we broke up after Christmas of this year and here I am back at home with my parents and feeling miserable and ugly.
I was so beautiful and had a great body and was always the center of attention. But, now I am well over 200 lbs, my hair is crap and I can't do anything with it, I need to see a dentist because I have a chipped front tooth and I'm worried about their overall health, my skin is just absolutely horrible. I am broke out, have a lot of redness, and no, I'm not even cleansing it.
I'm truly miserable. I mean, I don't even leave the house. I know what I need to do to revive my beauty, but can't get motivated. I am trying to save money to buy a new home in Florida so that I can move out of my parent's home in Tennessee. I just feel I can't afford beauty products and procedures anymore. If I can't have it all, I don't want anything! I know that's a bad attitude, but it's how I feel. I want everything. Well, truly there is so much I need since I don't own anything right now and have been using my parents dollar store products.
I guess my question is do you think if I were to invest in some high-end beauty products that I would feel better about myself? I'm trying to save for a home I want to buy in Florida and on top of that I have got a lot of bills to pay. I'm not sure what to do. I feel ugly and useless. I don't have anyone to look good for. I just want to be active again and would like to meet a nice guy and start dating. Staying in the house and never stepping outside is not going to get me the things I want. I'm ready to start living again. Where should I start? No one is going to take me seriously with the way I look now.
Questions and comments are welcome!
Hi Sophisticated - Sorry to hear all this. I think you have a lot of good advice here, but I just wanted to add one thing. I'm willing to bet that during your relationship, your mental image changed long before your physical appearance ever did. Now that you're on the rebound - you need to get your mental image back into shape and I bet your physical appearance will naturally fall into line.
Truly see yourself as how you looked before this a**hole came into your life back in your mind. Remind yourself of how you looked and how you felt about yourself. It's going to be hard at first - but try and keep at it. Realize that you're in a mental/emotional hole right now and the worst thing you can do is to stay down. To quote Yogi Berra - "Baseball is 90% mental, the other half is physical." Focus on getting yourself up and out of the mental hole. You will be back to your old self in no time. I know it.
You don't need to spend a lot of money on expensive cosmetic products. Those don't give you real beauty, anyway. Most guys, myself included, prefer women who look good rolling out of bed at 8am.
Here are the things you DO need to take care of if you want to get back to looking good.
See a dentist. Bad teeth are a deal breaker for me. There have been many times when I have approached an attractive girl, then she smiled at me and revealed a jacked up grill. That pretty much stops my pursuit dead in its tracks. You don't need caps, veneers, ridiculous whitening procedures, or anything like that. You DO need to get your chipped tooth fixed, get any cavities filled, and probably get a good deep cleaning which will make your teeth appear healthy.
Gym, Tan, Laundry. Simple as The Situation makes it out to be. Hit the gym to burn off the fat you accumulated during your time with your ex. Having a little color on your skin will make you look and feel better at any weight, and it will help the skin problems you seem to be having, too. Make sure you're wearing nice, clean, pressed clothes as well. You will look better and feel more confident. Wearing rags around will make you feel "frumpy" and defeats your entire mission to get out of this funk and start feeling better about yourself.
Take the advice of Missy Elliot "If you a fly gal, get your nails done, get a pedicure, get your hair did." You don't have to go to an expensive salon to do all this, either. Especially for your hair, you just need someone competent who can assess your situation, give you a cut and style that fits your face and body, and recommend some good affordable hair products to keep your mane looking healthy and shiny. The manicure and pedicure will help you look and feel attractive and put together.
If you were an attractive woman before, you can be an attractive woman again. It isn't like your DNA changed. Just take these few simple steps and you'll emerge from this malaise a new and even more improved version of the confident, attractive woman you always were. Good luck!
You dont need to tan to be attractive. Thats just for a certain look. Some people can't tan at all. And it does not improve skin problems, it just hides them, and it just makes for a future problem possibly with wrinkles,cancer and can aggravate acne.
Do some small things for yourself every day - get (or give yourself) a manicure, deep condition your hair, take a 2 mile walk, buy a new tube of lipstick, snack on some veggies instead of chips...
The chip on your tooth will cost money to fix but it shouldn't be that horribly expensive to fix it. Talk to a dentist - you'll feel better.
The small positive things you do for yourself today will all add up .
If you live in an area that has a cosmetology school or a dental school you may be able to get some of the services you need at a fraction of the cost you would normally pay. It's not as scary as it sounds, the students are supervised closely by their instructors.
Make an effort each and every day and before you know it you will see a glimmer of your former self. Good luck!!!!
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