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Old 10-28-2012, 07:33 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,126 posts, read 25,794,118 times
Reputation: 16226

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jerseygal4u View Post
That's a myth that some people will look better if they lose weight.
Some people look better bigger,in the face anyway.
I think being skinny or thin gives the illusion of "youth",and people automatically associate youth with attractiveness.

As far as plastic surgery,there are some things that can't be fixed.
For example,head shape,a heavy brow bone,a large jaw caused by bone structure,etc those are the hardest to get surgery on,and that's my problem. My cheekbones are way to high. Even though they are a beauty marker,high cheekbones are masculine. I'm not sure why some people wish for them.
I'm not even sure botox does anything besides get rid of wrinkles.
If a woman has a beautiful face,she will have a beautiful face regardless if there are wrinkles on it or not.
Exactly. My neck is far too short and when you mix that with my slightly broad shoulder it comes off as very masculine. No amount of surgery is going to elongate my neck and make it more feminine.

As for surgery, I can't get any regardless because I keloid scar. I wanted to get a nose job for a long time (my nose is bulbous and wide) and my doctor strongly advised against it because I would end up scarring badly and it would just look worse.

So, no surgery is possible for someone like me.
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Old 10-28-2012, 09:04 PM
 
Location: Portlandia "burbs"
10,236 posts, read 13,526,200 times
Reputation: 25856
To the OP:

I cannot imagine a woman going through life without ever having been whistled at, flirted with, or told how pretty she looks in something she's wearing. I really can't. And I worked for a woman who probably fit into this category, as she was quite homely and her childhood photos suggest that she always was. But she has been married for a long time to a man who loves her to pieces.

But, y'know, a goodlooking person can look very unappealing in a hurry if they don't have anything else going for them; whereas, a homely person can have a smile, or personality, that just lights them up.
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Old 10-31-2012, 12:10 PM
 
571 posts, read 947,208 times
Reputation: 1443
Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
I always find it funny when people say they USED to be ugly. It's like that movie, I forgot the name, where she goes from nerdy to 'beautiful', when I thought she was just as attractive nerdy. Sure, some of it is fashion and makeup, but I think most of it is basic genetic structure.

Why is thinness always equated with beauty? The two are separate. I've seen beautiful fat women and ugly thin women.
I think a lot of people on here are referring to how they perceived themselves and what kids said to them (a lot of that sinks in and stays with us).

I can honestly say that when I was a kid, I thought I was ugly. My mom used to tell me all the time that she didn't know how I was her daughter. I had straight dark hair and she wouldn't let it grow long because she said it made me look Indian (both my parents are South American and that racist thread of "Spanish" descendants looking down on Indians runs deep). So she kept my hair short (it looked like it'd been chopped by a lawn mower). I wore big glasses and I was very shy. The clothes were terrible, too. So for kids, all that exterior counts for a lot. It wasn't until high school when I got contacts that people made nice comments about my looks. I was nominated for homecoming princess and when I told my mom she laughed and said "Are you kidding? Leave that to others and stick to your studies, which is what you're really good at."

Needless to say, I left home at 18 and was able to distance myself from my bipolar mom. I was quite surprised at how guys reacted to me in college. Today, it is more "in" to have exotic features than it was when Christie Brinkley was the poster girl. I hear from a lot of people that I have "model" features. I won't deny that I get nice treatment from people as I go about my day. That being said, I think that in jobs I haven't been taken as seriously sometimes. When I worked in NYC, my boss used to ask me to wear glasses to meetings so I'd look more intellectual. Eh, what are we going to do? People do judge based on appearance.

I do notice that in the world of parents, some moms tend to keep their distance and aren't quick to invite me into their circle. One parent I met at school told me to my face that she'd love to invite me to join her book club but I was too pretty. There are all types in this world. Still, I'm not one to claim it's better to be unattractive.

We don't have a whole lot of control over our genes and I always keep that in mind.
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Old 11-01-2012, 10:07 AM
 
6,023 posts, read 6,521,704 times
Reputation: 8305
This thread is interesting...AND makes me glad I'm not ugly.
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Old 11-01-2012, 12:18 PM
 
1,661 posts, read 1,151,643 times
Reputation: 1424
Being ugly sucks and it's worse knowing that no women will ever be interested in me. It kinda makes me want to kill myself sometimes.
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Old 11-01-2012, 12:50 PM
 
1,459 posts, read 2,120,814 times
Reputation: 3084
Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey View Post
Exactly. My neck is far too short and when you mix that with my slightly broad shoulder it comes off as very masculine. No amount of surgery is going to elongate my neck and make it more feminine.

As for surgery, I can't get any regardless because I keloid scar. I wanted to get a nose job for a long time (my nose is bulbous and wide) and my doctor strongly advised against it because I would end up scarring badly and it would just look worse.

So, no surgery is possible for someone like me.
I find myself curious as to what you look like.
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Old 11-01-2012, 05:39 PM
 
Location: Yakima WA
3,858 posts, read 4,280,122 times
Reputation: 3155
Quote:
Originally Posted by Angelcake4 View Post
I think a lot of people on here are referring to how they perceived themselves and what kids said to them (a lot of that sinks in and stays with us).

I can honestly say that when I was a kid, I thought I was ugly. My mom used to tell me all the time that she didn't know how I was her daughter. I had straight dark hair and she wouldn't let it grow long because she said it made me look Indian (both my parents are South American and that racist thread of "Spanish" descendants looking down on Indians runs deep). So she kept my hair short (it looked like it'd been chopped by a lawn mower). I wore big glasses and I was very shy. The clothes were terrible, too. So for kids, all that exterior counts for a lot. It wasn't until high school when I got contacts that people made nice comments about my looks. I was nominated for homecoming princess and when I told my mom she laughed and said "Are you kidding? Leave that to others and stick to your studies, which is what you're really good at."

Needless to say, I left home at 18 and was able to distance myself from my bipolar mom. I was quite surprised at how guys reacted to me in college. Today, it is more "in" to have exotic features than it was when Christie Brinkley was the poster girl. I hear from a lot of people that I have "model" features. I won't deny that I get nice treatment from people as I go about my day. That being said, I think that in jobs I haven't been taken as seriously sometimes. When I worked in NYC, my boss used to ask me to wear glasses to meetings so I'd look more intellectual. Eh, what are we going to do? People do judge based on appearance.

I do notice that in the world of parents, some moms tend to keep their distance and aren't quick to invite me into their circle. One parent I met at school told me to my face that she'd love to invite me to join her book club but I was too pretty. There are all types in this world. Still, I'm not one to claim it's better to be unattractive.

We don't have a whole lot of control over our genes and I always keep that in mind.

Maybe I'm wrong but it's my perception that there are less pretty women than when I was younger. If that is the case I put part of the blame on women like the book club lady. I believe there are many women who are downplaying their beauty due to pressure from other women. It's all part of the war on female beauty.
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Old 11-01-2012, 05:41 PM
 
6,023 posts, read 6,521,704 times
Reputation: 8305
Quote:
Being ugly sucks and it's worse knowing that no women will ever be interested in me. It kinda makes me want to kill myself sometimes.
This is not meant to be condescending at all, it's true......never say never. There is no reason for you to be so absolute.

If para- and quadriplegics, and amputees, and little people, blind people -- and others with physical features one can clearly say are 'challenges' -- can find spouses and/or partners....I know you can, too. Heck, even mentally challenged people find relationships.

I would suggest that YOU don't make a big deal over your looks. You may not even be ugly. Even if you are there are a whole LOT of ugly married people. You'd be surprised how many ugly people work what they've got. They're out there dressing fine... and think they're fine too.

Confidence and self esteem in themselves are magnets that attract others.
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