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Old 08-06-2012, 09:17 AM
 
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Actually Nyanna,I don't know if a therapist can say that.
If they do,they can have their license suspended.
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Old 08-06-2012, 09:24 AM
 
Location: My House
33,055 posts, read 26,861,279 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jerseygal4u View Post
Actually Nyanna,I don't know if a therapist can say that.
If they do,they can have their license suspended.
I was thinking it would be unethical, too. Hence my surprise.
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Old 08-06-2012, 09:40 AM
 
Location: Up North
3,404 posts, read 7,250,918 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nyanna View Post
therapist is not going to help her. they will make the situation worse. some will tell you that you are unattractive

Don't believe this one bit. Even a bad therapist wouldn't do this...and if you run into one, just shop around til you find a good one you trust.

My therapist is not the most professional, but even just being able to talk it out to ANYONE helps. She is an ex-hippie, staunch feminist...which is not who I am at all but it works out.







Quote:
Originally Posted by meh_whatever View Post
Nah. Variety of complexions. One that springs to mind (we hung out quite a bit together when we were younger) was from a large family. Seven kids. All different shades of brown. Some quite dark. Some very light. Same mom. Same dad.

My friend was fairly dark, but she rarely hung out with black women outside her family. They were wealthy and attended private schools. She was often accused of not being "black" enough.


I'm confident she would've mentioned the seedy underbelly of fierce discrimination. If it existed.

And I live in a Southern state.

Granted, I do realize Halle Berry types are more accepted in the mainstream than the Williams sisters.

For us white girls, it's centerfolds and supermodels.

Be yourself. Someone will appreciate it. Besides, it's who you are.

Yes...we all have almost impossible beauty images to look up to. Do most models and supermodels look like everyday non-black women?
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Old 08-27-2012, 01:12 PM
 
Location: Earth Wanderer, longing for the stars.
12,411 posts, read 15,933,357 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dragonborn View Post
Of course. Then again you also put plastic surgery ahead of getting an education
so you can mooch off a man. I rest my case.

Perhaps you two should hook up (after your surgery, of course).
I'm afraid that I am inclined to think that's the case, too, because so many women DO think that way. That, or she thinks she can better manipulate men who have some positions of power into giving her special consideration solely because of her appearance.

Either way, it's dishonest and I don't think people who think that way are happy with themselves.
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Old 08-27-2012, 01:24 PM
 
Location: Earth Wanderer, longing for the stars.
12,411 posts, read 15,933,357 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nyanna View Post
therapist is not going to help her. they will make the situation worse. some will tell you that you are unattractive
Well, at least that is an unbiased opinion. She has no girlfriends. She needs a sounding board to bounce this idea off of and we don't know her personality or what she looks like.

Cosmetic surgeons say their worse clients are those who try to change the way they look to make up from a personality or character flaw. A therapist might determine whether she looks normal or seriously odd.

I know several women who obviously got nose jobs when they were younger. Their families all have these distinctive noses, yet if I mention going to a plastic surgeon they do not open their mouths. Women are very funny regarding their appearance.
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Old 08-27-2012, 11:19 PM
 
8,195 posts, read 10,205,914 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by goldengrain View Post
I'm afraid that I am inclined to think that's the case, too, because so many women DO think that way. That, or she thinks she can better manipulate men who have some positions of power into giving her special consideration solely because of her appearance.

Either way, it's dishonest and I don't think people who think that way are happy with themselves.
Women are just as harsh as men about appearance,if not more.
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Old 08-28-2012, 06:43 AM
 
499 posts, read 614,106 times
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Masters Degree here. Necessary for my job. If I could do it all over again I would've went to a community college and took my time, then NOT go for a Masters. I'm in SL debt (living well and paying it off, but I hate debt as it limits what I can do to a certain extent), and I have friends who make less than $20/hr have little or no college education, who are happy, as or more independent than I am, and owe nothing.

If the education is necessary for your profession and required for serious advancement, then I say go for it. If it's just the "bragging rights" you're looking for, then don't waste your time. Software developers with a simple B.A. or B.S. and less than 2 yrs experience make $90K+

It's about drive, planning, perstistance, experience and motivation. Bill Gates, P. Diddy, Steve Jobs.....all college dropouts.

A Teacher w/a Masters or Social Worker with a masters is pushing $42-60K in NY.

As said, my friend is a Software Developer, and less than a year in, he's making $85K

A woman with a solid B.A. in the right profession w/plastic surgery if she wants it has more market value IMO.

I would probably advance faster in any field if I had leg lengthening to grow taller (14% of men are above 6ft, but 97% of C.E.O.s are above 6'), but I love myself too much to subject myself to that B.S.

Last edited by Walter002; 08-28-2012 at 06:55 AM..
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Old 08-28-2012, 04:12 PM
 
Location: Earth Wanderer, longing for the stars.
12,411 posts, read 15,933,357 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Walter002 View Post
Masters Degree here. Necessary for my job. If I could do it all over again I would've went to a community college and took my time, then NOT go for a Masters. I'm in SL debt (living well and paying it off, but I hate debt as it limits what I can do to a certain extent), and I have friends who make less than $20/hr have little or no college education, who are happy, as or more independent than I am, and owe nothing.

If the education is necessary for your profession and required for serious advancement, then I say go for it. If it's just the "bragging rights" you're looking for, then don't waste your time. Software developers with a simple B.A. or B.S. and less than 2 yrs experience make $90K+

It's about drive, planning, perstistance, experience and motivation. Bill Gates, P. Diddy, Steve Jobs.....all college dropouts.

A Teacher w/a Masters or Social Worker with a masters is pushing $42-60K in NY.

As said, my friend is a Software Developer, and less than a year in, he's making $85K

A woman with a solid B.A. in the right profession w/plastic surgery if she wants it has more market value IMO.

I would probably advance faster in any field if I had leg lengthening to grow taller (14% of men are above 6ft, but 97% of C.E.O.s are above 6'), but I love myself too much to subject myself to that B.S.
I agree with the highlighted area in particular.
I think your happy friends who have settled for less than you might think differently in the future after you get out from under your debt and have had the opportunity to save for retirement.

You can only work with what you are given to better your position in life.
If the OP does elect cosmetic surgery she should, I believe, get the best surgeon that she can. I think we all see, even professional actors, who look peculiar from their facial work.
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Old 08-31-2012, 12:36 AM
 
8,161 posts, read 9,361,414 times
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One thing to consider is that cosmetic surgery can go wrong. You may not get the results you hoped for, or even come out looking worse. If you do go for the surgery, make sure to use a board-certified plastic surgeon. Don't fall for the 'cosmetic surgeon' line. There is a huge difference.

As to your original question,well that's a tough one. I've seen some drop-dead gorgeous women working very menial jobs, and some real horses doing very well.
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Old 08-31-2012, 08:54 AM
 
Location: Up North
3,404 posts, read 7,250,918 times
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I have seen bad plastic surgery in my time in Florida but their is nothing more jarring than a bad boob job. Some are almost painful to look at. Especially when they just look like two rocks under skin with no natural breast tissue to soften up the look a little.

Overly inflated lips and even weird faces never got me like a creepy boob job
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