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Old 08-24-2012, 09:49 AM
 
Location: La lune et les étoiles
17,414 posts, read 18,291,476 times
Reputation: 18593

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Quote:
Originally Posted by nyanna View Post
It's easy for you to say this when you're lightskinned and mixed.
Nyanna, I am a Black woman in America. My life is not "easier" and nothing in life is handed to me on a silver platter because of being a shade lighter or darker than the next Black person. So it really does not matter if I am light or dark or any of the shades in between, there are many difficult things that all Black people have to deal with in this life. The question is: are you going to let the negative things break you?

When you let the negative things that happen in life define you, then you've lost. You are the loser. God has given you blessings and all you do is curse Him. You need to do some major soul searching and pray for clarity of perspective because if wheelchair bound blind/deaf quadriplegics can embrace the beauty in this world and find love, then so can you. But the ugliest thing about you is your obsessive, negative attitude.
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Old 08-24-2012, 10:38 AM
 
Location: Oakland, CA
26,879 posts, read 28,182,235 times
Reputation: 26003
This is an exclusionary beauty ideal. Here is some good commentary on the whole thing: Beauty Whitewashed: How White Ideals Exclude Women of Color | BEAUTY REDEFINED
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Old 08-24-2012, 11:36 PM
 
Location: West Coast
1,199 posts, read 2,115,835 times
Reputation: 2098
Quote:
Originally Posted by calipoppy View Post
Nyanna, I am a Black woman in America. My life is not "easier" and nothing in life is handed to me on a silver platter because of being a shade lighter or darker than the next Black person. So it really does not matter if I am light or dark or any of the shades in between, there are many difficult things that all Black people have to deal with in this life. The question is: are you going to let the negative things break you?

When you let the negative things that happen in life define you, then you've lost. You are the loser. God has given you blessings and all you do is curse Him. You need to do some major soul searching and pray for clarity of perspective because if wheelchair bound blind/deaf quadriplegics can embrace the beauty in this world and find love, then so can you. But the ugliest thing about you is your obsessive, negative attitude.
I am still not convinced that Nyanna is a Black woman. I think someone is pretending to be. It happens quite frequently on forums.
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Old 08-25-2012, 06:13 AM
 
Location: Up North
3,404 posts, read 7,260,273 times
Reputation: 3037
I almost think nyanna assumes that "lightskinned" blacks (whatever...wheres the cutoff?) and whites in general have everything easy with no problems or adversity.

WAKE UP...we all do. Everyone has negative things and setbacks that happen to them...but if you walk around angry about it or mad at the world....it radiates and other people can feel it and see it.


There are beautiful women of all shades...it's all about confidence (not cockyness or smugness).


I used to work in a ***** bar and one of the dancers that seemed to have the most money spent on her was a skinny black girl with average sized proportions..definitely not light by any means who went by the name "Naomi".

She had such a great attitude and personality and was easy to talk to.

She would come into work and sit at the bar. She would order a glass or Merlot and within 20 minutes a guy would stick to her like glue. She didn't even have to try to work the room like other dancers...she just waited and I know she was in the top 20% of earners.


It was her personality, her unique look, her feminine yet unique style, and her manners. She had class and never cussed. It was easy to forget she was a dancer.
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Old 08-25-2012, 06:26 AM
 
Location: Kenmore, WA
7,359 posts, read 6,220,948 times
Reputation: 10577
Quote:
Originally Posted by Joy74 View Post
This phenomenon has many very plain looking, and even ugly men and women thinking they are attractive. Most are just average. I don't get the excitement about blond hair and blue eyes.
It just the dominance of the White-Anglo-Saxon-Protestant (WASP) culture that founded this country. Recall that between the British Empire and the Northern European Crusaders, the dark menace has been cast in an evil light throughout our mythologies. It actually has no reality in anyone's life. In fact, I've always thought the combination fairly plain and boring.
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Old 08-25-2012, 01:43 PM
 
Location: Chicago
6,005 posts, read 13,187,102 times
Reputation: 7956
Quote:
Originally Posted by BradPiff View Post
Because who controls the media and TV....


People with blond hair and blue eyes and they try to make that seem as the gold standard of beauty
This is almost laughable, not just because of the oft repeated joke of Jewish people running the media, but also because blond haired, blue eyed women and people in general are FAR from the majority on TV right now.

I've done some thinking over the course of these thread and noticed that someone made a list of leading women in movies and how most of them are not blond. Let's make a list of how many blond women (I'll stick with the ladies for now though may throw in a few guys when needed) play major roles on network and cable television. This is not an exhaustive list because even I don't watch that much TV:

Julie Benz-Modern Family: one of the biggest shows on TV, but when people talk about it, she's usually not the once mentioned. Yes, she's very talented and beautiful, but the "breakout stars" of that show, the ones getting most of the press and award nominations have been Sofia Vergara, Ty Burrell, Eric Stonestreet, and Jesse Tyler Fergusson-3 dark haired actors and a red head. Julie Benz is the ONLY blond on that show (they didn't even make any of the kids blond).

January Jones-Mad Men: hit drama but she's a borderline minor character. She's not a beloved character (people aren't fond of Betty Draper) and she's not a particularly beloved-or even liked- actress as well. The main actors people talk about on that show are Jon Hamm, Christina Hendricks, and Elizabeth Moss- all not blond.

Claire Danes-Homeland: major role, pretty, but bats*%t crazy on the show ! Plus before this role, she wasn't really a major A-list actor in Hollywood and I think in her other roles, she was brunette.

Kaley Cuoco-Big Bang Theory: I think they needed a blonde on this show to fit the stereotype of two smart, nerdy, dorky guys trying to hook up with their hot, "dumb blonde" neighbor/friend.

Anna Paquin-True Blood: I think her being a blonde on that show fulfills the same requirements that Sarah Michelle Gellar being blonde on Buffy the Vampire Slayer filled- tiny, petite blonde girl going against the stereotype of being helpless and holding her own in dangerous situations.

Gillian Jacobs-Community: a blonde in an assemble cast that includes a pretty brunette and a black woman not afraid to rock curls on the shows or in real life.

Game of Thrones: Yeah, so all the main characters who are blond are part of a crazy, incestuous, backstabbing family.

I could go on, but looking at leading ladies on TV today, you've got dark haired ladies like Vergara, Emily/Zooey Deschanel, Nina Dobrev, Kat Jennings, Julianne Margulies, Kerry Washington, etc. As mentioned before, blond haired, blue eyed has longed stopped being the media standard, both on TV and film. These days when you see blond haired people on TV/movies, it's either because their were casted w/o regard of their race/hair color or they're there to fulfill a specific-oft times negative-stereotype like the "dumb blonde" or "vapid rich blonde".

Quote:
Originally Posted by calipoppy View Post
Nyanna, I am a Black woman in America. My life is not "easier" and nothing in life is handed to me on a silver platter because of being a shade lighter or darker than the next Black person. So it really does not matter if I am light or dark or any of the shades in between, there are many difficult things that all Black people have to deal with in this life. The question is: are you going to let the negative things break you?

When you let the negative things that happen in life define you, then you've lost. You are the loser. God has given you blessings and all you do is curse Him. You need to do some major soul searching and pray for clarity of perspective because if wheelchair bound blind/deaf quadriplegics can embrace the beauty in this world and find love, then so can you. But the ugliest thing about you is your obsessive, negative attitude.
Especially the bolded part. People aren't attracted to "stank" attitudes, part of the reason why people like Kristen Stewart isn't a well liked actress and Lindsey Lohan, no matter how blonde she goes, will likely never have much of a career again.
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Old 08-26-2012, 11:35 AM
 
11,437 posts, read 19,459,889 times
Reputation: 18141
My husband just got this odd English book from 1933 -- it shows Hollywood and English stars of the day, both in head shots and movie stills. A fair number of them were "blonde" -- by bottle or natural (and one of the biggest sex symbols was Jean Harlow -- bottle blonde extraordinaire) but more of them -- and all of them called beauties -- were brunettes.

I don't think blonde haired blue eyed is THE beauty standard... its *a* beauty standard...one of many.

Its like my husband says (and I believe it's a quote) If everybody liked the same things, every body would want my old lady.
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Old 08-27-2012, 08:53 AM
 
9,209 posts, read 18,067,630 times
Reputation: 21953
I think the woman in this thread who thinks blond is the prevailing standard of beauty, should hook up with the guy who started the other thread about how he's oppressed by "everyone" thinking 30 is "old" and robbing him of his youth by thinking that.

They would be PERFECT together! She's oppressed by all the anti-brunette sentiment that rules the world, he's oppressed by people calling him old and cheating him out of his youth. I think it's a perfect match, but, if it doesn't work out, they can always blame the rest of the world for oppressing them with its opinions.
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Old 08-28-2012, 10:57 AM
 
Location: SF CA, USA
4,187 posts, read 4,216,459 times
Reputation: 4935
Eh, I don't really like blonde that much. I much prefer raven black hair.

Example: women like Kate Beckinsale or Rhona Mitra...eeyup.
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Old 08-28-2012, 11:40 AM
 
1,258 posts, read 1,852,962 times
Reputation: 1286
Blonde hair/blue eyes has been forced upon us by the media and white society however I do not think it's the standard of beauty for most men. My DH is black/asian and he likes dark hair and eyes only. Even when he picks out attractive white women it's usually Angelina Jolie or Jessica Alba.
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