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Op,may I suggest you take a trip to West aFrica,where they aren't affected by the Eurocentric
standard of beauty
It will be a real eye opener. People who look JUST like you,with your features(what does that mean anyway)?
Beautiful people,in Nollywood. Get some African movies. Men who will tell you that you are beautiful all day long.
I read about a few women that did this,and they weren't the same again after coming back to the Usa.
Another thing I would suggest is get out of Detroit. If you were in the south,I would say the same thing.
Move to either an Afrocentric city(Nyc,mainly Brooklyn) or a place where there are few african americans(Seattle,but any of the West coast may do.
If you must,Plastic surgery can help I guess. Tweak your body a little,or a lot.
At least you can change some of the things you don't like. I can't.
Its not her looks or her skin tone...its her mind.
Nyanna is young. I hear it all the time in the schools as a sub nurse.
Black a.. girl,greasy black,ashy black...
So it isn't just OP,my sister tells me the same,and she works at a fed agency.
Just listen to the rap crap coming out of the south. Lil wayne,for instance,always talking about a redbone.
His famous line"I bet that bit.. look better red" refering to a pretty dark skinned girl who would look better lighskinned.
Worldhiphopstar had interviewed some high schoolers about skin color.....just google it it. The things they said,sad.
The problem with statements such as these is that Black Americans are being lumped into one monolithic group with a singular mindset. Does colorism exist? Yes, but it is not as debilitating as the OP (nyanna) or anyone else would have one believe. The problem becomes when one choses to internalize this nonsense and present themselves to the world in a manner that says that they believe that they are less than.
Nyanna has obviously internalized the message that dark skin is unattractive despite the multitude of evidence to the contrary. The only that that satisfies her is a chorus of anonymous people chiming in the agree with her already deluded sense of self worth based on her coloring.
Also, I hate when people quote folks like Lil Wayne or other entertainers/athletes/etc who have their own issues regarding color. Their opinions are only known because they have notoriety but that does not mean that these men are healthy representatives of what is truly beautiful. Actually I would venture to say that these men have an even more warped sense of beauty and very little value should be placed on their opinions.
The problem with statements such as these is that Black Americans are being lumped into one monolithic group with a singular mindset. Does colorism exist? Yes, but it is not as debilitating as the OP (nyanna) or anyone else would have one believe. The problem becomes when one choses to internalize this nonsense and present themselves to the world in a manner that says that they believe that they are less than.
Nyanna has obviously internalized the message that dark skin is unattractive despite the multitude of evidence to the contrary. The only that that satisfies her is a chorus of anonymous people chiming in the agree with her already deluded sense of self worth based on her coloring.
Also, I hate when people quote folks like Lil Wayne or other entertainers/athletes/etc who have their own issues regarding color. Their opinions are only known because they have notoriety but that does not mean that these men are healthy representatives of what is truly beautiful. Actually I would venture to say that these men have an even more warped sense of beauty and very little value should be placed on their opinions.
Lil Wayne is only saying what most black men and women think
Online I do see alot of "dark is beautiful" and "black is beautiful" uplifting support groups but this does not exist in real life.
When I go out in the real world who gets more attention and respect? white, asian, latina, and mixed girls.
people can say I am throwing a pity party all the way. but how would you like knowing that women like you are viewed as ******* and hoes? getting second and third class treatment when you go places just because you are a darkskin black woman. I've seen lightskin/white/hispanic girls drop things on the ground and a bunch of black/white guys rush to pick things up for them. what happens when i drop my stuff? i am left to pick it up by myself
i do my hair, makeup and dress nice but it doesn't mean anything if its on a black woman. no matter what i do to myself i am a black woman and i get no respect from anyone in society
i honestly dont think i have any purpose to live. i dont know why i was put here and made to look like this if i am going to get treated like i am nothing
being a black woman is nothing but misery. its all about suffering. i'd never want to come back as one in another lifetime. never.
Lil Wayne is only saying what most black men and women think
Online I do see alot of "dark is beautiful" and "black is beautiful" uplifting support groups but this does not exist in real life.
When I go out in the real world who gets more attention and respect? white, asian, latina, and mixed girls.
people can say I am throwing a pity party all the way. but how would you like knowing that women like you are viewed as ******* and hoes? getting second and third class treatment when you go places just because you are a darkskin black woman. I've seen lightskin/white/hispanic girls drop things on the ground and a bunch of black/white guys rush to pick things up for them. what happens when i drop my stuff? i am left to pick it up by myself
i do my hair, makeup and dress nice but it doesn't mean anything if its on a black woman. no matter what i do to myself i am a black woman and i get no respect from anyone in society
i honestly dont think i have any purpose to live. i dont know why i was put here and made to look like this if i am going to get treated like i am nothing
being a black woman is nothing but misery. its all about suffering. i'd never want to come back as one in another lifetime. never.
So riddle me this....if dark skinned women are just soooo unattractive, then how do you explain the ones who have wonderful husbands and boyfriends in their lives? And in the past, if dark skinned African slave women were just so unattractive, how was it possible that (some of) these women became the lovers and mistresses of European men? If dark skinned women are so unattractive, then how is it possible that dark skin has not been basically bred out of existence. Someone has to be attracted to dark skin women because they are still here.
Stop the pity party. If you don't think that you are beautiful, then no one else will either. The power of attraction has a lot to do with more than just physical attributes. It is also about the enrgy that someone gives out to the world. Work on that for yourself because even the most physically unattractive people are able to find love and happiness in this world. If a woman with no arms and no legs or a man with cranofacial distortions (yet they have great attitudes) can find love, I am sure that you can as well.
ETA (just re-read the last part of your sad little post): I love being a Black woman. And I really do feel sorry for you but I haven't experienced this same "misery".
Location: where people are either too stupid to leave or too stuck to move
3,982 posts, read 6,687,625 times
Reputation: 3689
Quote:
Originally Posted by nyanna
Lil Wayne is only saying what most black men and women think
Online I do see alot of "dark is beautiful" and "black is beautiful" uplifting support groups but this does not exist in real life.
When I go out in the real world who gets more attention and respect? white, asian, latina, and mixed girls.
people can say I am throwing a pity party all the way. but how would you like knowing that women like you are viewed as ******* and hoes? getting second and third class treatment when you go places just because you are a darkskin black woman. I've seen lightskin/white/hispanic girls drop things on the ground and a bunch of black/white guys rush to pick things up for them. what happens when i drop my stuff? i am left to pick it up by myself
i do my hair, makeup and dress nice but it doesn't mean anything if its on a black woman. no matter what i do to myself i am a black woman and i get no respect from anyone in society
i honestly dont think i have any purpose to live. i dont know why i was put here and made to look like this if i am going to get treated like i am nothing
being a black woman is nothing but misery. its all about suffering. i'd never want to come back as one in another lifetime. never.
Oh my goodness..what on earth happened in the past day when I didn't log on to city-data?
I don't know how to link to my original response but that is not what I said at all!!!
I pointed out that a woman who was possibly mixed that I have known was gorgeous and she pulled off dyed blonde hair like a damn supermodel in response to someone who thought black woman who dyed hair blonde were sad/pathetic. How is that offensive? I didn't even say anything about black women besides that.
Because she pulls things out of context and twists them to her liking. Then she says she is going to kill herself.....again.
Lil Wayne is only saying what most black men and women think
Online I do see alot of "dark is beautiful" and "black is beautiful" uplifting support groups but this does not exist in real life.
When I go out in the real world who gets more attention and respect? white, asian, latina, and mixed girls.
people can say I am throwing a pity party all the way. but how would you like knowing that women like you are viewed as ******* and hoes? getting second and third class treatment when you go places just because you are a darkskin black woman. I've seen lightskin/white/hispanic girls drop things on the ground and a bunch of black/white guys rush to pick things up for them. what happens when i drop my stuff? i am left to pick it up by myself
i do my hair, makeup and dress nice but it doesn't mean anything if its on a black woman. no matter what i do to myself i am a black woman and i get no respect from anyone in society
i honestly dont think i have any purpose to live. i dont know why i was put here and made to look like this if i am going to get treated like i am nothing
being a black woman is nothing but misery. its all about suffering. i'd never want to come back as one in another lifetime. never.
There is a very dark, black skinned woman in our group (married BTW), no white features. I've NEVER seen her treated differently than any one of us.
Nyanna, you are going to have to realize that this self-hatred you have is NOT normal, or even reasonable.
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