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Old 10-16-2007, 08:32 PM
253 posts, read 1,014,083 times
Reputation: 87


Originally Posted by KittensPurr View Post
I just adore everyone who answered this post!!!

I'm a licensed hairdresser & have seen time & time again that the way we each look best is how we feel the most comfortable, confident & feminine (or masculine, for the lads), in whichever way that manifests. For some women it's short, some medium & some long. Some love blonde, some red, some embrace their salt & peppery hair & others wish to modify & tone it. None are wrong.

I remember 30-yrs ago, as a student, attending a demonstration at a platform hairshow with my very respected hairdressing instructor, watching a famous hairdresser whip an older, modest, quiet, wallflower of a woman's hair into a teased, sprayed, 5th Avenue, vibrantly-colored frenzy. Although she had the perfect type of hair & coloring for this particular Vogue style bouffant & savagely cool color, the poor, shy, older, meek, horrified woman walked off the stage scared to death of her own hair. She actually looked like she needed medical attention as she was in such shock & I'm sure she must have burst into tears on her way to her own hairdresser afterwards, to bring her hair back to what suited her comfort level.

My hairdressing teacher leaned over & said to me "Let this be a great lesson to you. That modest, shy woman wanted a modest, quiet hairstyle. It may not be the most stylish, but your job is to perfect "her" look. He did a great technical job. But, if he truly wanted to serve his client he'd have readily seen a vastly different client. He was trying to give her someone else's personality." It's been the best hairdressing lesson, still.

Same with someone who wants a long, wild, blonde bedhead. That's what I've got most of the time. I can tone it down & smooth it out, but although I'm 40, I don't look, feel or desire to resemble a 1930's librarian because of a number. I like it, I look good in it, I'm comfortable & confident with it & I'm going to keep it until I no longer look/feel comfortable, just like the others who've cut their hair, feel great & love it. You wear your hair well when you feel like a million bucks! I only feel feminine in long hair, other women do in short or medium length hair.

Anne, listen to the suggestions as objectively as possible & then make your own decision. I have said to clients, "Instead of cutting 1-ft, would you prefer to modify it by trimming a bit at a time or cutting from the waist to the elbow first?" If they want short red or a blue mohawk now (this was 20-yrs ago), I make them comfortable for their choices. It's not my hair to wear, but as a professional I feel obligated to gently give my opinion first, then honor their decision & let it go.

Many people don't like the word "change", but won't resist the word "modify". I think some see the word change as a criticism that their choice is wrong. So, perhaps the enthusiasm with which they're giving advice is coming across more as prodding you to conform to their desires? In any case, great advice here & it's nice to read many comments from confident women who know what's best for them!

I wish you good luck with your hairstyle, whether changed, modified or the same! Be comfortable & have fun... VV
I am in total agreement with you. This is excellent advice! The OP has to feel comfortable with the way they look. Regardless of what the hairdresser says or what anyone els thinks about you looking better with short hair versus long hair whatever a peson feels about themselves should be the ultimate deciding factor.
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Old 10-17-2007, 01:54 AM
9,350 posts, read 8,742,167 times
Reputation: 14405
Originally Posted by anneanne View Post
Grasonville, thanks for the link, but those pictures are not me at all! Even if I cut it shorter, I'd never cut most of it off like that. No offense, but those pictures frighten me.

My real argument is should I wear my hair the way I want, regardless of how others feel, or should I cut it the way others think I would look best?
IMO: wear your hair the way you like it best and whatever makes you feel the most comfortable. It is your hair and your decision.

If you are curious about how you would look with a shorter style, why not try on a few wigs and then see what you think? That way, if you don't like it, then no harm done.
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Old 12-20-2009, 10:48 AM
Location: Mayberry
31,581 posts, read 12,711,447 times
Reputation: 68361
What is it with men and long hair no matter how it looks I had long hair well into my 40's but now it just drags my face down, which I don't need. So mine is however I want it, short, then let it grow some, whatever, it is just hair. I am always changing it. But I seriously see women with long hair that really shouldn't have it for appearance wise only. If they like it then so be it!
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