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Old 07-28-2013, 06:46 PM
 
2,546 posts, read 5,927,818 times
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Sure. We all have our flaws.
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Old 07-28-2013, 06:48 PM
 
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Yes, I'd date a guy with a minor deformity - especially if he had a good sense of humor, self-confidence, and I felt comfortable around him.
IMHO, we all have "deformities", some are just invisible.
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Old 07-30-2013, 10:09 AM
 
Location: NW Indiana
39,356 posts, read 14,429,150 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WRolle View Post
So my cousin was born with glaucoma in both eyes. He has his life together, for all intents and purposes. He is currently in medical school. The problem is that, even though he works out and has a better abdomen than me, he has strabismus in one eye due to multiple surgeries. He already had surgery, but it had minimal impact. He says that girls automatically write him off due to his eye. He says that he has never been on a date but twice. I have a question for women, would you date a man with a minor deformity? He pretty much is on the road to success and takes care of himself.
Such a deformity wouldn't matter to me. I can't even think of a major physical deformity that would keep me from dating someone.

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Old 07-30-2013, 03:17 PM
 
Location: Middle America
35,817 posts, read 39,334,463 times
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I think it's odd that anything somebody might not like about a way a person looks is being labeled "a deformity."
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Old 07-30-2013, 03:33 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,126 posts, read 25,784,820 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
I think it's odd that anything somebody might not like about a way a person looks is being labeled "a deformity."
Well, it is unfortunately. My scars, my messed up bones, my weird looking knees (which is actually called Erlenmeyer flask deformity, so that's a kind of obvious one )etc etc. are definitely not normal and not seen in many people.

So yeah, I consider my physical issues deformities and there are a lot of people who simply won't consider me as a viable partner solely because of them.
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Old 07-30-2013, 03:34 PM
 
Location: Bowie, MD
303 posts, read 486,153 times
Reputation: 459
Future hubby has some kind of clot-type thingy on the right side of his chest, so it looks like he has a mini-boob. I have no problems with it whatsoever, but he's super self-conscious about it (and won't go topless at the pool even though he's otherwise very fit).

I find that personality is what matters most, and he's got that in spades.
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Old 07-30-2013, 03:38 PM
 
Location: Middle America
35,817 posts, read 39,334,463 times
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No. Just because somebody doesn't like the way you look, that doesn't equate to "You are deformed."
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Old 07-30-2013, 04:14 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TabulaRasa View Post
No. Just because somebody doesn't like the way you look, that doesn't equate to "You are deformed."
But...I am deformed.

And to me it's not an insult, just like people with my disorder joking refer to each other as mutants. I think it's healthier for me to embrace my deformed mutant status than try to hide it or work against it.
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Old 07-31-2013, 09:16 AM
 
1,955 posts, read 3,626,274 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Schermerhorn View Post
Easterner, I think you're misunderstanding. It's not a matter of "picking" -- it's a matter of getting any romantic attention at all. Beggars can't be choosers, unfortunately.
No, I understand. It may not be the case for the person mentioned in the OP. But a lot of people complain about not getting second dates, or entering the relationship phase because people write them off, or don't want to date someone with a "deformity". So either

1) He is not getting women to approach him (which happens rarely even for women)
2) He is going on dates and the women don't want to pursue a relationship any farther. Perhaps he needs to choose women to date who are not so fixated on physical appearance.

Often people keep going after a certain type of person, based on specific characteristic (usually physical), and not paying attention to other potential mates out there because they don't meet their physical ideal. At the end of the day, they are disappointed because a relationship does not materialize when the person they ask out turns out to be shallow, rude, treats them poorly, etc.
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