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Old 08-21-2013, 04:45 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
72,675 posts, read 64,140,481 times
Reputation: 68458

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Quote:
Originally Posted by jade408 View Post
Sleeves are not universally flattering at all.

I'd probably end up with a bodice something like so!
Felicia Gown - Sleeveless - Sleeve - Simply Bridal

I don't really like to go cleavage crazy.
WOW! THIS is CUTE! And elegant in its simplicity. And for 90% off the original price? Is that for real? Just wow!
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Old 08-21-2013, 05:28 PM
 
Location: Western Washington
8,004 posts, read 9,653,945 times
Reputation: 19408
When you look at those pictures later, what is it that you're going to be looking at, you or the dress? Is it going to grate on you later, if you choose an unflattering dress, simply because you like the dress style? Are you going to look at those pictures and say, "OMG, I look hideous! Why didn't someone STOP me!?"

Personally, I'm the kind of person who thinks things to death. In the end, I would choose the dress that was the most flattering. You know, I have wedding pictures of G and GG grandparents and to be honest with you, I've barely even noticed how they were dressed. I was looking at them, not their clothing. It's the same thing with my own wedding pictures...don't really even look at the clothes, I'm looking at those KIDS..at how damn young we were. LOL
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Old 08-22-2013, 01:18 AM
 
Location: Glasgow Scotland
14,505 posts, read 11,481,746 times
Reputation: 21003
TO me a wedding dress dates so fast and its the one you want to show off to our children and grandchildren.. I wouldnt like to have seen my granny in a low cut flashy version that a showgirl would wear ..The most beautiful bride ever Grace Kelly hasnt dated like some others have.. or am I just old fashioned now..
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Old 08-23-2013, 01:12 AM
 
Location: Ohio
14,315 posts, read 12,569,286 times
Reputation: 19017
Quote:
Originally Posted by dizzybint View Post
no no it not body shaming, IM not happy with all I have but I dont put it on display to jiggle around at the most important day of my life or wouldnt, Im trying to help .. there are tons of lovely dresses to flatter and suit a larger lady... thats all Im trying to say..
I get exactly what you are trying to say.

I am thin.....there have been a lot of styles in my lifetime I would have loved to wear.....but didn't.....because they would not look good on me.

Just because you love a dress or an outfit does not mean you should wear it.

You should choose clothing that flatters your figure.....whatever type of figure you have.

Strapless dresses are simply not flattering on overweight women.

That may not be the PC thing to say, but it is the truth.

As I said, I am thin......and I have never worn a strapless dress.....I just don't have the right looking collarbone and shoulders for it. That is just the way it is.

Why would anyone want to choose a dress for one of the most important days in their life that does not make them look their best?
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Old 08-23-2013, 01:47 AM
 
Location: San Antonio, TX
10,860 posts, read 18,883,731 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Annie53 View Post
I get exactly what you are trying to say.

I am thin.....there have been a lot of styles in my lifetime I would have loved to wear.....but didn't.....because they would not look good on me.

Just because you love a dress or an outfit does not mean you should wear it.

You should choose clothing that flatters your figure.....whatever type of figure you have.

Strapless dresses are simply not flattering on overweight women.

That may not be the PC thing to say, but it is the truth.

As I said, I am thin......and I have never worn a strapless dress.....I just don't have the right looking collarbone and shoulders for it. That is just the way it is.

Why would anyone want to choose a dress for one of the most important days in their life that does not make them look their best?
The addition of a couple of straps to a dress is not going to change how it looks on someone's collarbones or shoulders, or make a dress flattering. So what you really mean is that she needs to cover up more...or maybe not get married until she's lost enough weight to be presentable. What kind of dress do you think would be acceptable? Do you have a link or two?

Breasts are one body part that most plus-sized women feel positive about. A strapless dress puts the emphasis on that area. So it makes sense that she wants to wear one. Someone who thinks the way you do is not going to think that an overweight woman looks nice in anything. So why should she pick a dress that she doesn't want, which downplays an asset she wants to highlight, just to please people who won't be happy with anything that she picks?
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Old 08-23-2013, 02:24 AM
 
Location: Ohio
14,315 posts, read 12,569,286 times
Reputation: 19017
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hedgehog_Mom View Post
The addition of a couple of straps to a dress is not going to change how it looks on someone's collarbones or shoulders, or make a dress flattering. So what you really mean is that she needs to cover up more...or maybe not get married until she's lost enough weight to be presentable. What kind of dress do you think would be acceptable? Do you have a link or two?

Breasts are one body part that most plus-sized women feel positive about. A strapless dress puts the emphasis on that area. So it makes sense that she wants to wear one. Someone who thinks the way you do is not going to think that an overweight woman looks nice in anything. So why should she pick a dress that she doesn't want, which downplays an asset she wants to highlight, just to please people who won't be happy with anything that she picks?
Something like this:


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Old 08-23-2013, 11:45 AM
 
2,429 posts, read 3,053,819 times
Reputation: 3328
Quote:
Quote:
Originally Posted by ChessieMom
I don't think the strapless would be the best choice. Sorry.

I agree. I think a large bust needs more support than a strapless outfit can comfortably provide.
I'll third this point of view. A strapless dress is going to be tricker on someone 300+ pounds.

Don't hate me for this I'm just an anonymous opinion online.....

I think the SECOND dress is gorgeous, classic and elegant. For me -- the first dress has a lot going on just with the dress itself -- let alone putting it on someone your size -- sorry, it's just my honest opinion....BUT that said pick the dress YOU like best, and don't give a hoot about what others think.

The truth is at 300+ pounds you're not going to look but so small, or cute, or beautiful. You're going to have fat arms, a large waist, fat face, etc....because you're obese. Unless you've got a whole lot of muscle underneath the fat -- that's an awful lot of fat giggling and exposed. Given that... just wear the dress YOU want and don't give a darn about others. What do YOU think you look best in?

I'm plus sized, too. And the truth of it is...it IS harder for plus sized or obese people to 'look neater' in clothing. We have fit and design issues thinner people just don't have. That said, it's your day, one of the happiest in your life -- wear what YOU want.

Quote:
Breasts are one body part that most plus-sized women feel positive about. A strapless dress puts the emphasis on that area.
I'm w/ Annie53. A strapless dress does NOT put emphasis on the breasts/chest area it puts the emphasis on exposed shoulders upper arms and neck and collarbones area. That's a lot of flesh exposed for ANY bride let alone one 300+ pounds. there are a whole lot of dress that accent an hour glass figure and/or the chest/breasts, that aren't strapless.

I don't think any post I've seen has said anything about her needing to lose weight to be "presentable." Don't accuse people of saying something that wasn't said, just because you may THINK people are against the obese.

Last edited by rdflk; 08-23-2013 at 12:45 PM..
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Old 08-23-2013, 12:29 PM
 
Location: Oakland, CA
26,875 posts, read 28,145,186 times
Reputation: 25988
Quote:
Originally Posted by rdflk View Post

The truth is at 300+ pounds you're not going to look but so small, or cute, or beautiful. You're going to have fat arms, a large waist, fat face, etc....because you're obese. Unless you've got a whole lot of muscle underneath the fat -- that's an awful lot of fat giggling and exposed. Given that... just wear the dress YOU want and don't give a darn about others. What do YOU think you look best in?

I'm plus sized, too. And the truth of it is...it IS harder for plus sized or obese people to 'look neater' in clothing. We have fit and design issues thinner people just don't have.

Quote:
Originally Posted by rdflk View Post
I don't think any post I've seen has said anything about her needing to lose weight to be "presentable." Don't accuse people of saying something that wasn't said, just because you may THINK people are against the obese.
Review your own comment.

Last edited by jade408; 08-23-2013 at 12:38 PM..
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Old 08-23-2013, 12:51 PM
 
Location: Glasgow Scotland
14,505 posts, read 11,481,746 times
Reputation: 21003
Jade, if I were this bride asking a mum, sister or best friend for advice, Id like to think they would tell me the truth and help me find a dress to flatter my best assets. wouldnt you? We all have parts of our body we dislike.. , I hate my arms and stomach, and try to dress accordingly so that I feel comfortable and at ease. not scared to move my arms in case someone noticed my bingo wings.. and if this was my daughter or best friend and I was asked for my tuppence worth Id help them look through the racks for a nice style to suit them.
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Old 08-23-2013, 12:52 PM
 
2,429 posts, read 3,053,819 times
Reputation: 3328
Quote:
Review your own comment.
Are you saying that at 300-plus pounds that wearing a strapless dress she WON"T have a lot of arm, shoulder and neck area and some fat areas exposed? is that not the truth?

Where do I say she should lose weight to be presentable? Where do I say she can't look pretty?

In fact, I say more than once she should wear what SHE wants.

In my personal opinion, which is the only one I have -- I wouldn't wear the dress above ^^ or most strapless dresses if I were 300-plus pounds. Imagine that look from the back of a bride 300-plus pounds. I don't think it's the most attractive look she could achieve -- BUT if SHE thinks it looks good more power to her.

I don't hate fat people -- I'm overweight myself. Why is it a crime to say fat people don't look good in some things thinner people do? it's the truth, people. Accept it. You do know it's also true that very thin people don't look good in some things people or a "normal' weight do. (Please let's not even get into what's a normal weight.)

The bride should wear what SHE wants.
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