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Old 09-03-2013, 09:36 AM
 
1,955 posts, read 3,627,707 times
Reputation: 2755

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Quote:
Originally Posted by HuntFishRepeat View Post
How do you tell someone you are dating she might want to try a stylish hair cut and some make-up ?
Now, I'm no fashion expert by any stretch, but a woman I dated was a tall" Amazon" type that never liked to cut her hair or wear hardly any make up.
I never suggested anything but, sure thought about it....
Has anyone ever done it with any success. ?
You don't. Unless you want someone telling you that you should change your looks.
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Old 09-03-2013, 10:42 AM
 
Location: In the Zombie Room
1,603 posts, read 2,681,773 times
Reputation: 2466
Quote:
Originally Posted by HuntFishRepeat View Post
How do you tell someone you are dating she might want to try a stylish hair cut and some make-up ?
I'm just curious why you would feel a need to control how she looks? Do you think it is somehow a reflection on you? Do you have a need to control women in other areas too?

Could you secretly be a misogynist? Was your mother a super feminine type who wore lots of makeup and was overly concerned with her appearance?

Besides, you would hate to be broached with comments such as,
"you might want to try a different line of work, the on you have isn't making you much money"
"you might want to try a different position in bed, the one you're doing is turning me off"
"you might want to try dumping that bozo best friend of yours, he makes you look bad"
"you might want to try going on a diet, that gut of yours is very unattractive"
"you might want to try different clothing, the clothes you have are ugly"

Can you see how that would come across as controlling and quite honestly very rude and condescending, not at all loving and supportive?
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Old 09-03-2013, 11:41 AM
 
16,724 posts, read 13,676,345 times
Reputation: 40996
Default Omg!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey View Post
I've been asked if I was pre-op or post-op by several people
That is so hurtful!!! I'm not sure I couldn't have been ugly about it, back at them.
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Old 09-03-2013, 11:59 AM
 
186 posts, read 283,423 times
Reputation: 167
MY woman is ALWAYS the most lovely of all, and I make certain that she knows that I think so, but of course, I made sure she WAS, before I married her. :-)
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Old 09-03-2013, 01:35 PM
 
16,724 posts, read 13,676,345 times
Reputation: 40996
To the OP, if you don't like the way she looks, just throw her back

Repeat.
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Old 09-03-2013, 01:59 PM
 
812 posts, read 661,235 times
Reputation: 995
Boy did I open a can of worms ... First of all , I don't think I am controlling at all. I'm a very laid back person that tries really hard not to judge. I new telling her this could be hurtful so I kept my mouth shut.
I think we all know someone that has made an improvement in their appearance at some time.
I guess its one of those things if they don't ask for help don't offer....
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Old 09-03-2013, 02:03 PM
 
Location: North Beach, MD on the Chesapeake
32,111 posts, read 39,184,670 times
Reputation: 40537
Quote:
Originally Posted by HuntFishRepeat View Post
How do you tell someone you are dating she might want to try a stylish hair cut and some make-up ?
Now, I'm no fashion expert by any stretch, but a woman I dated was a tall" Amazon" type that never liked to cut her hair or wear hardly any make up.
I never suggested anything but, sure thought about it....
Has anyone ever done it with any success. ?
If she had these issues what attracted you to her in the first place? They apparently didn't deter you from asking her out and I guess continue to see her.
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Old 09-03-2013, 02:23 PM
 
Location: Up in the air
19,126 posts, read 25,794,118 times
Reputation: 16226
Quote:
Originally Posted by convextech View Post
That is so hurtful!!! I'm not sure I couldn't have been ugly about it, back at them.
I said 'pre op' and grabbed my crotch.

Like a lady.

I miss my early 20s when I could get away with stuff like that
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Old 09-03-2013, 02:31 PM
 
Location: North Beach, MD on the Chesapeake
32,111 posts, read 39,184,670 times
Reputation: 40537
Quote:
Originally Posted by JetJockey View Post
..............

Tall women do have to be careful. I've been asked if I was pre-op or post-op by several people
Honest to God, where do you meet these people that say some of this stuff to you?
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Old 09-03-2013, 04:39 PM
 
Location: Tucson for awhile longer
8,874 posts, read 12,921,392 times
Reputation: 28957
The only thing I've ever tried (mostly with relatives) is to point out another person who has the look you think they should aim for and say, "Look at that woman in the blue coat. Her haircut is really attractive. That style would look good on you." You'll probably get told WHY it isn't appropriate for the person-who-never-changes-their-look. But at least you've kept it in the positive realm and didn't state that there was anything wrong with the person in question. And if you are met with a defensive attack like, "SO! You think there's some thing wrong with me??" you'll know you're dealing with psychological issues such as fear of change.
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