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Old 10-22-2013, 10:07 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
21,464 posts, read 22,692,102 times
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I read this essay this morning and thought it was interesting: Will Women Ever Have the Freedom to Be Ugly?

Quote:
Women are "supposed" to be pretty all the time, whereas men can be a lot of things, and good looking is but one of them. And if he's not good-looking? Well he can just go be interesting, funny or rich.



There's a common quote in feminist literature men are instrumental, women are ornamental and it still echoes today. Most women will tell you that day in and out, they feel they must do everything to eradicate problem areas and enhance attributes, whether it's not eating, losing weight, working out, primping, perfuming, disguising, perfecting, and so on, and that's even IF they are interesting, funny or rich, or all three and then some. What's worse, no matter what they are, the quickest go-to insult to take a woman down a notch will involve a physical shortcoming 1,000,000% of the time.
And this is fitting for a forum such as this:

Quote:
But what the outrage and disgust and sense of betrayal from commenters on the Internet toward them suggests is that we have too little interest in looking more closely at why we feel so offended when women refuse to play pretty. It probably has something to do with the fact that men have long felt entitled to, if nothing else, a pretty lady on their arm, and that most of us gals aren't willing to reject this standard ourselves (I'm not saying we should, merely that it's complicated and contradictory).
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Old 10-22-2013, 10:10 AM
 
706 posts, read 911,897 times
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Interesting....
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Old 10-22-2013, 10:13 AM
 
Location: Melbourne, Australia
9,783 posts, read 15,328,540 times
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LOL I actually thought it'd be a Jezebel article. Not that they're that bad, but it was that sort of title...

But yeah, I do agree that too much attention is paid to women's looks at the expense at everything else, and this is perpetuated by both men and women. Consumerism just drives that.
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Old 10-22-2013, 10:50 AM
 
811 posts, read 980,679 times
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Oh please, that's a fine piece of blog that conveniently ignores that women brought this upon themselves and compete with one another from make up to fashion accessories.

And also play the victim card now
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Old 10-22-2013, 11:00 AM
 
706 posts, read 911,897 times
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I think that if a woman chooses not to all of the extras to be considered "pretty" she has that right. Yes, there is a focus on women being attractive, and there always will be. Nobody forces a woman to do anything she doesn't want to do in order to be seen as being attractive.
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Old 10-22-2013, 11:05 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
21,464 posts, read 22,692,102 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Duchamp Dude View Post
Oh please, that's a fine piece of blog that conveniently ignores that women brought this upon themselves and compete with one another from make up to fashion accessories.
What are they competing with each other for, though? If more attractive women are getting more desirable mates, better opportunities for career advancement, better service, etc, then focusing on appearance isn't really something that they've brought on themselves. It's something that culture and society have ingrained in women that they have to do to be taken seriously or to get ahead in life, and it's not something that they can ignore without drawbacks.
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Old 10-22-2013, 11:15 AM
 
811 posts, read 980,679 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
What are they competing with each other for, though? If more attractive women are getting more desirable mates, better opportunities for career advancement, better service, etc, then focusing on appearance isn't really something that they've brought on themselves. It's something that culture and society have ingrained in women that they have to do to be taken seriously or to get ahead in life, and it's not something that they can ignore without drawbacks.
I agree with the mates part. But I wish what you shaded were true.

Besides, even there, women simply won't let men look at them without make up. There are men out there who will take any kind of woman. Even the ugly ones in online dating get 100s of messages. So, I find it hard to believe it's anything other than self-inflicted.
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Old 10-22-2013, 11:23 AM
 
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One of the first comments on there

lethekkUTracy Moore 221L
I think women themselves are to blame for a lot of this. We get so used to judging and being cruel to each other from a young age. I remember in grade school that I didn't care one bit what my male classmates thought, but I was terrified of the mean comments that my 'friends' would say. Why can't we stop the stupid competition? Today 11:34am
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Old 10-22-2013, 11:25 AM
 
Location: Pittsburgh
21,464 posts, read 22,692,102 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Duchamp Dude View Post
I agree with the mates part. But I wish what you shaded were true.

.
The bolded is true: http://www.nytimes.com/2011/08/28/op...ase.html?_r=2&

Quote:
In addition to whatever personal pleasure it gives you, being attractive also helps you earn more money, find a higher-earning spouse (and one who looks better, too!) and get better deals on mortgages. Each of these facts has been demonstrated over the past 20 years by many economists and other researchers. The effects are not small: one study showed that an American worker who was among the bottom one-seventh in looks, as assessed by randomly chosen observers, earned 10 to 15 percent less per year than a similar worker whose looks were assessed in the top one-third — a lifetime difference, in a typical case, of about $230,000. ]
Quote:
Besides, even there, women simply won't let men look at them without make up. There are men out there who will take any kind of woman. Even the ugly ones in online dating get 100s of messages. So, I find it hard to believe it's anything other than self-inflicted.
So what if this kind of appearanced-based sexism has been internalized by women? It's generally women putting pressure on each other to be prettier for men than other women. Besides, men are plenty judgmental about women's looks-it's not women calling each other "butterfaces" or "grenades"

Last edited by fleetiebelle; 10-22-2013 at 12:37 PM..
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Old 10-22-2013, 11:25 AM
 
811 posts, read 980,679 times
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I've heard this a million times:

"OMG... what is she wearing??" <giggle, giggle, giggle>
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