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Old 06-23-2014, 04:24 PM
 
706 posts, read 912,068 times
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That black dress isn't matronly, IMO. I prefer my dresses a tad bit shorter than at the knee, but I'd wear that one to church or some other conservative occasion.
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Old 06-24-2014, 03:58 PM
 
396 posts, read 571,093 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by simplesunwater View Post
The italicized show the selfish attitude I'm describing...and no...its not like the husband looks.
And the insecurity is not because one does not feel attractive enough.
Its that there are values...insecurity can be because some values are being disrespected.

So now others also have to am up the sexy act?
so sexy is equivalnet to worthy?
and thus sex object is what women want to be?

and so if women start going around like strippers or give lap dances, other women won't feel insecure because a boundary is being breached?
instead THEY must also start doing the same?
Probably why women are getting more and more into dressing provocatively and convincing themselves and others that their sexual appeal or potential is the ONLY main value for them...
and thus deeming sex objectification for women.

who wins? is this really women's liberation? the freedom to go around semi nude and provocative in public with no regards to one's own sense of dignity...desperate to feel good about oneself by showing off some goods
aka...bargaining skin show to feel lovable and worthy?

probably why younger and younger women are dressing provocatively and trying to be sexy and having sex outside a marriage or committed relationship.
Who wins?
men get to see a free show and get a woman to cross boundaries without having to invest much.

and women are even more relegated to being sex objects.

So now women would be doing pole dancing naked in public?
would that be enough to feel ''lovable and worthy''??
and does that make a woman ''liberated'' or more caught up in seeing their self worth involved with a man's lustful attention...which is mostly what a woman who dressed like that gets usually

isnt a woman more than her body?
why not stand for some values?
why not wear a sticker to fight for cancer or fighting hunger?
why really need other's attention and disrupts other people's peace and harmony because one things one got it one will show it and walk semi- naked and not care about public decorum or the effect on children?
Great post!

You don't see men running around dressed uncomfortably to 'show off' some part of their body.
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Old 06-24-2014, 04:07 PM
 
396 posts, read 571,093 times
Reputation: 526
Quote:
Originally Posted by simplesunwater View Post
OK. OK. Heard. Enough mud-slinging on me or my partner. I have repeatedly stated that its not my partner who looks. He does not. I have no issues with him whatsoever. So you can drop that please.
And the kind of clothing you describe is fine. Upto knee length and all that. You are exaggerating it to say burqa...i never said so

and the kind of clothing described is NOT what women wear ...tiny little shorts...massive cleavage

why bikinis? men wear shorts...but women have to wear bikinis where half the bottom is hanging out?
can't one wear a sports bra and shorts.
I get that each person's standards may be different. But each person KNOWS what body parts are being revealed and how much and whats the intent...is it really out of necessity or to get an ego boost?

I don't have any problem with my hubby. I have problem with women dressed that way. Honestly, I have a low opinion of them. It seems sex is sold like the lowest possible thing. Its not scared anymore...people display body parts as though there is nothing more to them.

And thanks for the memo about feminism. Each person ahs THEIR OWN version of feminism. Some people take it to mean freedom without responsibility...that women should do whatever they want and nobody must question them and that they should not be held accountable for how they conduct themselves in public or take any responsibility.
I would never want my kinds to think its OK to sleep as a teenager or dress like a hooker. Sex is scared and so is the body and women need to uphold their dignity and not be piece of meat to all and any passerby...whatever be the ''standards'' of clothing...there is a common sense and each person knows why the cleavage is being shown and why there is the extra leg (waxed up and shined) to be shown off.

One can debate on a forum...but women have to ask themselves what they want...

and my point with the pole dancing was with response to the ''amp up the sexy'' part of the post earlier..so where will this end? women must compete more and more to amp up their sexuality? like there is nothing else to them? where will this end...with everybody walking around like a stripper?
yes so what are the boundaries?
is it really OK for someone to say they can walk around in a bikini and thats an OK standard for them and someone else may say they want to walk around topless everywhere...even to stores
some people wear pretty much completely see-through clothing in the summers. Thats OK for them.
Hey someone may walk around nude (many are almost semi-nude anyways in the summer..women much more so in an obviously attention-seeking manner...I am sure many have noticed that...its not just the comfort women use the summer time to show off maximum skin in maximum provocative way...men don't go around shirtless to walmart usually but women walk around in barely there shorts and see through netted transparent shirts...I'm not exaggerating and I'm sure people know what I am talking about).

so bikini is OK now...then someone would want to go topless...the stores and streets are filled with overly flashy dressed people...so each person tries to amp up their sexy...so this may only end in strippers all over...where is the cutoff??

don't the liberated women have any sense of responsibility? is it always to blame others or their husbands?
is this a role model to set to children growing up?
isn't there any sense of responsibility?

Thats my opinion. And I'm not posting here anymore.
Women are free too free to bargain their skin show for superficial attention all they want. I believe it caused damage to the society...and creates a negative idea for others...and re-inforces the sex objectification of women.
And eventually those women only get lust, not love or real respect.

One do what one wants, one gets what one seeks...if its lust from strangers and disrespect from others and causes daage to some others, so be it. Freedom eventually meets up with responsibility, whether one like it or not.
Thats all I have to say.
Please don't stop posting. You're doing great!
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Old 06-24-2014, 04:18 PM
 
396 posts, read 571,093 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShinyHappyLucy View Post
Your spouse expects you to stay the same from the day you marry till the day you die? That's boring and stifling. Life is all about growth and change, and keeping someone interested in you goes way beyond how you dress. There are many differences in who I am both internally and externally from 17 years ago. All of it, with the exception of things I can't control, I MUCH prefer over the person I was when I first got married, including the way I dress. I don't even care if anyone else likes my changes because for once I really like who I am.
Couldn't agree more. Great post, ShinyHappyLucy!
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Old 06-24-2014, 04:24 PM
 
396 posts, read 571,093 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Caltovegas View Post
For all the women who complain about the looks men give them just wait. I once talked to a woman and she said the worst part about aging is becoming invisible. She said when she was young men would talk to her all the time and give her approving looks but as she got older men didn't pay as much if any attention to her.

The sad part was that included her husband. I sat next to her on a plane and she thanked me for talking to her while on the flight. I was like damn.. During the whole flight the husband said nothing to her.

Now if course it's not that extreme for all but for all age is an equalizer. Looks fade for all.
If the only reason somebody is going to notice you or want to talk to you is because you look hot, then why would you want their attention or want to speak with them?

The woman on the plane needs to dump the husband.
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Old 06-26-2014, 09:17 PM
 
Location: Washington DC
241 posts, read 265,969 times
Reputation: 387
This probably doesn't have to do anything with thread, but I have noticed that women around my age and younger don't know to be sexy. Their definition of sexy is usually wearing trashy stripper like clothing/costumes and over doing it on the makeup to the point that they look like clown. Its possible to be sexy yet classy at the same time. Just look at Hollywood starlets from the 40s-60s if you want to see naturally beautiful women who have a wholesome charm to them yet oozed with sex appeal. As they say, wearing more leaves more to the imagination.
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Old 06-27-2014, 08:26 AM
 
14,649 posts, read 29,700,640 times
Reputation: 17216
Quote:
Originally Posted by MissLadyLexi25 View Post
This probably doesn't have to do anything with thread, but I have noticed that women around my age and younger don't know to be sexy. Their definition of sexy is usually wearing trashy stripper like clothing/costumes and over doing it on the makeup to the point that they look like clown. Its possible to be sexy yet classy at the same time. Just look at Hollywood starlets from the 40s-60s if you want to see naturally beautiful women who have a wholesome charm to them yet oozed with sex appeal. As they say, wearing more leaves more to the imagination.
This, this and this ^^^^ (bolded part). My husband says that all the time. He thinks those vintage Hollywood starlets and "cheesecake" models were far sexier than what we have today. I love that look and do my best to emulate that style, even at my older age.
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Old 06-27-2014, 09:57 PM
 
Location: Central Maine
2,868 posts, read 2,843,280 times
Reputation: 3976
Women who don't dress revealing and male attention

Knew a woman like this once that I worked with in a hospital(she was an RN). She didn't dress revealing or sexy in fact most of the time she was wearing scrubs. Otherwise it was generally casual attire. Problem was is that she had a good build (no I am not talking brick s**t-house, just generally athletic) and she was incredibly, and I mean INCREDIBLY pretty. No, she did not flirt in fact sometimes she just snapped at people to avoid attention. She caught me once staring at her, I was unconsciously because she was pretty, and she met my stare and followed it up with a loud, firm "WHAT"!! I just said "nothing" and turned away. She wasn't necessarily a b***h, she was just tired of all of the attention. I mean she couldn't come to work with a bag over her head. Once I got to know her casually better, she wasn't a bad person. But I remember more than once, someone uninvited following her home from the hospital and her having to call the police because of it. I guess that being attractive can really have its drawbacks.
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Old 06-27-2014, 10:29 PM
 
7,315 posts, read 5,271,385 times
Reputation: 2830
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vintage_girl View Post
I see there are sometimes discussions about women who dress revealing and complain about the attention. What about the women who don't dress revealing and get attention?

The attention would obviously be different. Suppose you're a relatively modest woman who'd rather not have her boobs all hanging out. Or have her butt cheeks so pronounced you can see every contour. Now you're wearing a nice outfit in flattering colors and you end up receiving the attention of men. Is this necessarily a bad thing?

Sometimes I think we've demonized male attention because of the women who dress revealing and believe they should be able to select for who gives them attention. I've seen a lot of women who wear tasteful and flattering sundresses and men will look at them, but they aren't looking at them like a piece of meat. The men are looking at them as if saying "that's a feminine woman." Or heck, they might look because it may have been the first time they've seen a woman look tasteful in a long time and they can't believe it. Maybe they notice a particular item the woman is wearing and that gets their attention, in contrast to her breasts, butt, or legs. Wouldn't it be preferable if a man noticed a woman's face, the color of her dress, or how a necklace makes her look rather than how much cleavage she has? I find this topic (both sides) interesting.
The problem I see is that women's fashions have become about being undressed rather than dressed.

Men have always been dressed, no problem there.
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Old 06-27-2014, 10:34 PM
 
7,315 posts, read 5,271,385 times
Reputation: 2830
Quote:
Originally Posted by go-getta-J View Post
Wow....all I can say is I'm so glad I live far away from you prudes!

I'm in South Beach, the skin capital of the world You would all have a heart attack at some of the outfits (or lack of) women wear here. They are all attractive and in-shape to boot, and not afraid to show off what they have. The thing is, it's so common down here, no one really makes a big deal out of it. Only in the rest of the country do sexually repressed men have a seizure and the women go into a witch-burning frenzy at the sight of a scantily clad female.

This place is heaven for a single man like myself. So glad I got out of my hometown where all the prude mediocre women seemed obsessed with doing was enforcing Sharia law on any woman that made a modicum of effort to look nice and stylish.
No doubt. South Beach is a freak's paradise - a true circus, naked clowns all over the place. You could sit there for an hour and wonder how many of these people were raised by wolves.
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