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I just got my first performance appraisal at my job. I have worked as a HR Manager for a mid sized financial company in New York City (Manhattan). He told me that the team does not take me seriously and part of the reason is my long middle of my back hair. I have always had long hair and it is the only style I know. My boss pointed out women on the management team who have short or bob style hair who look more professional. He suggested if I want to be taken more seriously I should cut my hair.
Is this sexist or good advice?
totally uncool on your managers part, I would have serendipitously stuck a post-it note on his back that said "kick me"
John T. Molloy has written books on how the way you look is perceived by others. I learned not to wear dark clothes on preschool storyhour day. Children respond better to someone in a frilly dress. It relates to their perception that their mothers are more lovely and happy and cheerful and fun when they are dressed in party clothes. I couldn't wear a party dress but I chose less threatening clothes. The red suit is the power suit in business. Hope you look good in red.
I am getting very tired of the stringy hair flopping all over the place on so many women today. You grew up, so clean it up and make it look professional if you want to be taken seriously. Otherwise people will not think you are capable of being a professional. I don't think length is as important as control. Put a cute little bun on the side of your head and get some really professional ear decoration. See how much better you feel about yourself.
I believe the pageboy tested to be the most favorable hair style. Many female news staff use this style. The way you look does matter.
There are other rules too about what you wear. John T. Molloy's books are about the psychology of dressing rather than the style of dressing. The first book he wrote for women was for the professional's wife so she could look the part. It even had a list of what should be in the suitcase when she traveled with her husband to the boss's house for the weekend.
I think he later wrote a book for the professional lady.
One of my best friends used to do weekend workshops for major companies to teach their employees how to make a good impression on their clients. It included clothes and makeup and things about not gossiping, etc.
The following book will help you find your best colors and then you can find the colors that look best on you that has the most favorable impression on others from the John T. Molloy book. http://www.amazon.com/Color-Me-Seaso.../dp/0941522008
When I read these books I didn't find out a lot different from what I knew already as to which styles and colors looked best on me but I did find out why I did like certain styles and did not like other things.
I also found which designs to look for when shopping such as paisley print is a winner material and loud flower says "loser."
I just got my first performance appraisal at my job. I have worked as a HR Manager for a mid sized financial company in New York City (Manhattan). He told me that the team does not take me seriously and part of the reason is my long middle of my back hair. I have always had long hair and it is the only style I know. My boss pointed out women on the management team who have short or bob style hair who look more professional. He suggested if I want to be taken more seriously I should cut my hair.
Is this sexist or good advice?
It's unnecessary. You can just put it up in some kind of up-do. That's perfectly professional. If it's true that your peers aren't taking you seriously because of the long hair, it's good feedback he gave you. Generally, hair that's loose and below shoulder length is considered unprofessional for executive-type positions.
That would make me mad as a hornet. It can't be about your HAIR. It's just hair. Keep it neat and as long as you like. I used to have very long (straight, brown) hair and was teased about "flipping it" or putting my hands through it a lot, so I stopped. Maybe that's causing some kind of distraction, but my God, if that's the worst thing he has to say to you, you're in great shape.
Is he balding, by chance?
This is a very important point. If you're prone to flipping, tucking, and touching your hair a lot, that's body language you need to be aware of and put a halt to in a professional environment. Whether you do that by fixing your long hair back in a bun or chignon or some other out of your face and contained style, or you cut it all off, as long as you can keep from touching it repeatedly.
Location: Went around the corner & now I'm lost!!!!
1,544 posts, read 3,599,250 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CCc girl
He likes dikes, he feels threatened by your good looks. Maybe he's gay.
I was thinking along these lines also Something is not being said between the narrow lines. Ask the others with short hair why they are cutting it short and who told them to and then everything will come to light
There are many young women especially that wear long high school styled hair, that does not look professional in the business world. As some have said, it makes a young woman look younger than she is, and if you are a young looking person as some are, it says YOUNG KID to so many people. If you have a serious job, you don't want to give the Young Kid look as you will not be taken seriously. It kind of sounds like you are doing a good job,and in the future you may be given more responsibility. This is not going to happen, if your hair, dress, way of speaking says YOUNG KID and you are not taken seriously. Especially if you are working in HR with more mature people that look at you and do not take you seriously.
Go talk to a good hair stylist, explain the problem and let them guide you on how to have a more serious professional look which can be from putting your hair up one way or another, a different hair style or cutting it.
I am a male, and looked 25 by the time I was 16. 6'2" tall, broad shouldered and well built by 12. Never grew any more. I always looked older when I was young, and that got me better jobs and promoted due to my mature look. I worked as high as division sales manager over the western division (western half the U.S.).
Your boss is giving you advice that he/she feels will help you do your job and possibly advance with the company. If your hair style says Young Kid, it is a detriment, just as looking more mature than my age get me better jobs and promoted young.
I just got my first performance appraisal at my job. I have worked as a HR Manager for a mid sized financial company in New York City (Manhattan). He told me that the team does not take me seriously and part of the reason is my long middle of my back hair. I have always had long hair and it is the only style I know. My boss pointed out women on the management team who have short or bob style hair who look more professional. He suggested if I want to be taken more seriously I should cut my hair.
Is this sexist or good advice?
If your work does not speak for you, either you or your manager (or both) have issues besides your hair.
There are many young women especially that wear long high school styled hair, that does not look professional in the business world. As some have said, it makes a young woman look younger than she is, and if you are a young looking person as some are, it says YOUNG KID to so many people. If you have a serious job, you don't want to give the Young Kid look as you will not be taken seriously. It kind of sounds like you are doing a good job,and in the future you may be given more responsibility. This is not going to happen, if your hair, dress, way of speaking says YOUNG KID and you are not taken seriously. Especially if you are working in HR with more mature people that look at you and do not take you seriously.
Go talk to a good hair stylist, explain the problem and let them guide you on how to have a more serious professional look which can be from putting your hair up one way or another, a different hair style or cutting it.
I am a male, and looked 25 by the time I was 16. 6'2" tall, broad shouldered and well built by 12. Never grew any more. I always looked older when I was young, and that got me better jobs and promoted due to my mature look. I worked as high as division sales manager over the western division (western half the U.S.).
Your boss is giving you advice that he/she feels will help you do your job and possibly advance with the company. If your hair style says Young Kid, it is a detriment, just as looking more mature than my age get me better jobs and promoted young.
It looks perfectly professional. All you are stating is your assumed talking points with zero objectivity behind them. You "think" this is how it is, therefore you craft your opinion around this.
I seriously doubt you got promoted based on your "mature" looks; you can state this all you want with obviously no one able to prove/disprove, but that really says something for your skills, or lack of if true.
Professional looking earrings. Not all earrings should be worn to the office.
And K350, people with a closed mind have a hard time improving themselves.
In an HR position, I would think books on handwriting analysis. body language, manners, etc. could help you improve your employee's performances and help your company grow to excellence.
Last edited by NCN; 08-01-2014 at 07:00 PM..
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Something is not being said between the narrow lines. Ask the others with short hair why they are cutting it short and who told them to and then everything will come to light 
