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Old 12-11-2014, 01:14 PM
370 posts, read 450,665 times
Reputation: 390


Originally Posted by Vintage Life View Post
I am so embarrassed right now,red faced. I am so sorry that I even wrote that. You can not see me or my face, nor how I express things when I say them. My world are my children. I am nearly 50 years old and have been married for 25 years and think this is a good age gap, don't you remember the Color Me Beautiful and Beauticontrol drapings? Or the fashion profiles, my mom and I both got one. It was all the rage in the 80's and fun to do. They told you what your style was and how to accessorize, even what body type you were and what were the right fits for clothes. I wanted to do something together or do a personal profile. If you read my post you will see my own mother did the same thing with me 25 years ago and it was fun. It is frustrating as a mom to see her baby go off and you don't say a word because you don't want to hurt their feelings. I don't say a thing. She actually has had bad criticism in the past and told that she was not good enough and it took everything for me to build her up. She never went to a public school so t shirts were ok around the house. No she doesn't have a boyfriend nor interested right now. Very proud of her, I am just hurt that no one can read and get what I am saying. I don't come on here often, I thought this was a good place to ask. It is fashion and beauty. There is no venom in my words to each of you. I forgive you. If you knew me, you would know I have fought, loved and let her be who she is. No boxes. Again I am sorry.
I think your intentions are full of love. But at the same time I feel that this is more your issue. Maybe I could have worded that kinder. I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings.

I am certain you love her with all your heart.

When you talk about what you and your mom did together, it sounds like something you both wanted and liked to do. But I don't get the same vibe from your daughter. She seems to either not care or really likes her style. So when I hear that she doesn't seem interested, I don't understand why you want to change her? I think you want to maybe save her from hurt and trouble but really she is grown now. She can handle it. If someone talks down to her about her looks she will either ignore it or change it.

On a truly serious note...could she maybe be color blind? Some women are, although uncommon.
It could also be that she will turn a corner at some point but not today. I have seen plenty of women totally change around 26-32 in terms of style and dress. Sometimes it happens when they marry or have kids. Sometimes it is due to career. And sometimes it just happens on their own.It's like they finally grow up or something. Like they kind of just trotted along, not paying any attention to their style and then all of a sudden it hits.

I knew a woman like that. In her 20's she couldn't have cared less about fashion. She would buy a cheap purse at Target, never caring about what it looked like and use that until it fell apart. She literally would only buy beige "granny panties" because it was simple. Kept her hair long and straight. Not a lot of make-up. She married an attorney and before I knew it, she had morphed into a woman wearing a 4 carat pear shaped rock, carried LV and got her hair cut into an actual style. I am not sure if it was her husband or something else but it happened. No one pushed her.

In the meantime, focus on what you do have in common with your daughter. And keep inviting her to shop and do girly things. =) Even if you never agree on a style you will have those memories! You're a good mom. I promise.
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Old 12-11-2014, 01:28 PM
3,153 posts, read 2,846,998 times
Reputation: 8665
I'm not sure there is any way to get someone with bad fashion sense to improve without actually hurting their feelings first and proving their fashion sense is bad. You might have to just keep silent. Not sure how much money you have, but where I live personal shoppers are popular. If you wanted to buy her some new clothes, you could have a personal shopping session. I know there are image consultants out there, but don't know of any companies like that. Maybe when she graduates, a good present would be to find an image consultant to help her pick out work-appropriate and interview outfits - you have to dress differently for work than school so you wouldn't have to point out that there is anything wrong with her clothes now.

Have to say I don't get the game colors, thing - who dresses in game colors except drunk frat guys?? I never would. She might have been better off without that advice.
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Old 12-11-2014, 07:40 PM
1,250 posts, read 1,079,663 times
Reputation: 1022
There are no rules in fashion. Just let her dress herself up. Maybe she'll be embarrassed and stop doing it
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