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Old 04-09-2015, 04:45 PM
 
Location: Southern New Hampshire
6,724 posts, read 11,749,349 times
Reputation: 19361

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OP, no matter how beautiful you are, there will ALWAYS be someone who's better looking. If you think that beauty is ALL that matters in relationships, then wow, you are really missing out.

We all get older (unless we die young, and who wants that?), which means that by the only-youth-is-beautiful standards of the U.S., we get less and less attractive as we age. Hopefully we are nice enough or intelligent enough or kind enough that we are still worth being with. (Honestly, I can't believe I even have to WRITE this. I was considered gorgeous in my teens and 20s (cheerleader type, blah blah blah). Now I'm 56 and those looks are gone. Thank goodness there was (and is!) more to me than my looks, otherwise I would have fallen into a deep depression a long time ago. That is no way to live life!)
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Old 04-09-2015, 05:55 PM
 
Location: SW Florida
2,298 posts, read 1,671,042 times
Reputation: 2227
I think just about everyone feels this way many times. I compare myself more then I should. I honestly have n fashion sence.. mostly jeans and tshirt boring plain.. I see others so well put together and think why cant I do that? Its frustrating, same with makeup. Honestly, I try but never seem to get it right. I am a frugal person to, I watch videos for make up of girls using eyeshadow palettes that run $50 each! I am 27, feel I should be more along with this stuff then I am. Try not to feel to down, and as others suggested try to list out a plan and what you want to imrove on.
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Old 04-09-2015, 06:32 PM
 
Location: Houston, TX
1,229 posts, read 964,713 times
Reputation: 3822
Work on not comparing your insides to other people's outsides....taking care of yourself (physically, mentally and spiritually) will work wonders and will shine through

What another poster said is true.....work on being the best YOU that you can be. Not fake, phony, etc.....relax, breathe and be YOU.
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Old 04-09-2015, 08:14 PM
 
8,108 posts, read 4,454,981 times
Reputation: 8738
Quote:
Originally Posted by keraT View Post
"who would bother looking at me when such beauties are around".
honest, i don't even give super pretty ladies a second look, I'm tired of all my friend trying to hump her all day. I want plain, everyday, over weight nice person, a lot on the plain side with a little ugly into it.
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Old 04-09-2015, 08:23 PM
 
Location: 48.0710 N, 118.1989 W
590 posts, read 481,573 times
Reputation: 874
Quote:
Originally Posted by brownbagg View Post
honest, i don't even give super pretty ladies a second look, I'm tired of all my friend trying to hump her all day. I want plain, everyday, over weight nice person, a lot on the plain side with a little ugly into it.

what friends do u have?
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Old 04-10-2015, 05:15 AM
 
1 posts, read 567 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by keraT View Post
Sometimes I see beautiful people (female specially) & then I will look at myself in the mirror in bathroom and feel so Bla. Especially when I see beautiful, fit & intelligent girls then I compare myself to her & wonder "who would bother looking at me when such beauties are around".

How do you manage thoughts like that? I know the saying "if we put all our problem in pile & saw others problem, we will pick ours back up'. I am sure beautiful smart females have their own problem too & I shouldn't compare myself to others. But at times I wonder, I am so average. I can't help but compare
I 've been through the same thing, though I am a male. I never considered myself pretty enough to find anybody interested in me. And I also haven't been dating for a pretty long time. I would go further and compared to the others I thought I was worthless. I found myself depressed. Theres a nice blog on how depression affects the thinking: whatdepressionfeelslike.com. The best advice would be to stop comparing and being aware of own worth, only if it was that easy.

But the number one evidence that this kind of thinking is wrong is that now I live with my girlfriend who is unbelievable beautiful (not that that's all so important in relationship) while I still am the guy who wouldn't believe there could be anybody interested in him. Hope that helps
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Old 04-10-2015, 05:22 AM
 
Location: Austin
4,103 posts, read 5,891,057 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by keraT View Post
Sometimes I see beautiful people (female specially) & then I will look at myself in the mirror in bathroom and feel so Bla. Especially when I see beautiful, fit & intelligent girls then I compare myself to her & wonder "who would bother looking at me when such beauties are around".

How do you manage thoughts like that? I know the saying "if we put all our problem in pile & saw others problem, we will pick ours back up'. I am sure beautiful smart females have their own problem too & I shouldn't compare myself to others. But at times I wonder, I am so average. I can't help but compare
I felt that way sometimes when I was in my teens and 20s. Now that I'm in my late 30s I really don't care what people think or compare myself to others anymore.
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Old 04-10-2015, 06:52 AM
 
2,574 posts, read 1,043,805 times
Reputation: 1710
Quote:
Originally Posted by hawaiiancoconut View Post
Don't worry about it. Average is what most guys go for
Yes don't forget the average man is also average. More importantly everyone has certain special qualities that make them unique.
Lastly beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You may not think you are special looking but I would bet there are people who do think you are.
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Old 04-10-2015, 07:14 AM
 
7,497 posts, read 9,280,426 times
Reputation: 7394
Everybody feels like that from time to time. I'm not particularly prone to envy so maybe I can't help you, but all you can do is highlight what you feel are your best features and experiment with looks you like that you think look good.
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Old 04-10-2015, 09:45 AM
 
Location: Ruidoso, NM
5,170 posts, read 4,734,508 times
Reputation: 4206
Quote:
Originally Posted by keraT View Post
But at times I wonder, I am so average. I can't help but compare
I don't know if it makes you feel better, but if you are "so average" then a lot of people are in worse shape.

Everybody gets to be who they are. You get to be you. Many traits you are born with, and you can't do anything about how you were raised. But from there it's all up to you.

Pay attention to your inside and the outside will take care of itself. Self judgement is a good thing to practice letting go of.
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