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I've talked to my mom about this as well. She came of age in the 50s, and said that at that time, people wanted to look older. They wanted to look like adults. So when you see those pictures and think, "dang they look old," that's what they wanted, and they thought they looked good.
Well, my great great grandma died in 1863, and I meant her face looked old. Definitely not what we've come to expect 40 yr. olds to look like now.
My mom and dad 'came of age' in the 50's. Maybe because of that, I've been fascinated with 50's fashions. It's so iconic to me. Plus...I was born in 57, so lots of the movies I saw as a kid were set in the 50's, the dresses I played dress up in were 50's formals, the stuff my grandma had in her closet (that we used to play in) were 50's hats, dresses, fur coats... and the 50's costume jewelry my grandma would buy up at garage sales and send to me and my sisters...
What? I'm a man and I even know blow driers were a thing in the 80's, and probably in the mid to late 70's as well, but maybe not widely available then.
Hand held hair dryers for consumer use have been around since the 1920s.
Quote:
Originally Posted by riaelise
I don't try to look like a twenty year old, but I'm not ready for Sag Harbor either.
Bwah hahahaha, I've been wearing Sag Harbor since I was in my 20s. The brand is merely a department store version of LL Bean: classic clothing leaning toward preppy.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gerania
Does anyone below the age of 65 want to buy clothing from a company called Sag Harbor?
Ever been to Sag Harbor?
Last edited by Ohiogirl81; 02-07-2018 at 10:03 AM..
Retro keeps coming back in style. Just enjoy it or hate it and wait it out. Ideally women should be dressing to please themselves. Not you or their female friends or anyone. I have to remind myself when my husband breaks out the urban camo (which I really think is hideous unless you need urban camo for ahem- military service- which he is not) that I dress how I like and only dress for him when I'm trying to help him impress his employers at a company function.
I've talked to my mom about this as well. She came of age in the 50s, and said that at that time, people wanted to look older. They wanted to look like adults. So when you see those pictures and think, "dang they look old," that's what they wanted, and they thought they looked good.
This. There was a respectability to being an adult. You didn't get that respect until you looked and acted like a grownup. I saw people do this as late as the 90s, with immediate haircuts and fashion changes when women got married or had kids, even young women. They were proud of this step in life and their look would distinguish them from unmarried, unchilded friends, that they were in adult mode. I also remember women who always wanted to look quite professional, and that would be an outfit of long skirt suit, sensible hair, hose and mid heeled pumps.
None of this screams glamorous sexy youthful, it was more about being serious about some life direction and the fashion went with that.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with being sexy or glamorous. There's a time and place for everything. Your dress should reflect how you feel as a person, and sorry, my tastes are across the board and I make no apology. I'm not trying to be anyone other than myself. We need to stop the categorizing here - if you are someone who dressed a certain way most of your life, then why should you dress differently as an older woman?
Why should older women wear long dresses (as a matter of course)? Why can't they cut, color, or do whatever they want to do with their hair? Somehow they're not to be taken seriously and dismissed? I was born in 1975. I didn't get the memo that I'm old. I didn't get the memo that somehow I'm supposed to transform into someone I'm not just so people are reminded that I am "mature".
I am multifaceted. There are times when I am glamorous, I am elegant, I'm a suburban mom, I am in your face sexy. Women can be all of those things and shouldn't feel ashamed. I am in better condition now in my 40s than a decade ago.
Wow, that was some acting job, then! She pulled it off superbly!
She was the best.
And she was a fascinating woman IRL, or at least in interviews. Gracious, quietly funny. Accent peaking out at odd times. Down to earth, natural. Yet with that grace behind it all. And BRIGHT.
I remember seeing an interview I think in the 70s, maybe late 70s with her and I was flabbergasted, we all were. We were like, okay, yup. She definitely can act! LOL!
One of my favorite poems that I think is quite fitting in this thread.. The author passes away one month ago today at the age of 85. When I Am Old.
When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat that doesn't go, and doesn't suit me,
And I shall spend my pension
on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals,
and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I am tired,
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells,
And run my stick along the public railings,
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick the flowers in other people's gardens,
And learn to spit.
You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat,
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go,
Or only bread and pickle for a week,
And hoard pens and pencils and beer mats
and things in boxes.
But now we must have clothes that keep us dry,
And pay our rent and not swear in the street,
And set a good example for the children.
We will have friends to dinner and read the papers.
But maybe I ought to practise a little now?
So people who know me
are not too shocked and surprised,
When suddenly I am old
and start to wear purple!
My mum is 52 and has hair down to the middle of her back, and she dyes it as often as possible. She HATES grey hair, and even a few are deemed unacceptable to her. Her natural hair colour is a very nice auburn - she used to straighten it a lot but now she leaves it in its natural wavy state (which looks much better imo - very similar to this, with the same upwards kink at the hairline).
She never dresses frumpy either, and if she ever did start dressing frumpy, I think my sister (who is 32) would tell her off.
My mom is the same way. She's 58 years old and looks amazing. She hates grey hair too. She keeps her hair slightly longer than shoulder length and she has bangs. She has an amazing sense of style and looks very good. It is funny, my MIL is maybe a year or two older than my mom but looks like she could be my mom's mom.
It is crazy how much older some women on TV and movies of yesteryear looked. I'm not saying they looked bad, most of them were very beautiful but I do find that they looked older than they were.
writerwife: I had a beloved relative, my dearest Great Aunt, who was my best example of wonderful qualities to emulate...my other family did not "get" her, but we "got" each other and were very close. She passed away a few years ago. She had a beautiful calligraphy piece of that poem on the wall in her home, as far back as I could remember, and as a little girl I even loved it, and I tried to faithfully copy it in the beautiful colors used (various colored ink, so pretty) so I could take a copy of it home with me. I saw what you posted, and I could not read that poem just now, because I'd be sobbing here at my desk at work.
Regarding the subject at hand:
American culture has been getting more individualistic since I would guess the 60's on, maybe starting somewhat earlier than that, but certainly by then. The idea of "dress how you want, do it for your own happiness and comfort" is relatively new in our history and some people (as seen here) still push back against it.
I can well imagine a suburban community here, before the era where married mothers were also in the workforce (which is also a concept that still gets pushback) and the suburban housewives who formed a community to one another, and they all dress pretty sensibly, and how do you think they would treat one of their own who chose to dress more youthfully and tried to look *gasp!* SEXY after marriage and motherhood? Well, she might well be whispered of as a husband luring harlot, for one thing. Remember, it is still argued that a man's enjoyment of looking at a sexy woman, is entirely to do with what she is wearing. You simply did not step out of line in such a social atmosphere.
No matter if she looked how her own husband wanted her to, all of the other husbands would be looking too, and their wives would notice. Much easier to blend in and be sensible and "dress your age."
And there is, too, the factor that many people do cling to what they found to be appealing when THEY were young, and try to "rock" fashion aspects long after they have gone "out of style" and therefore look somewhat dated. Sure. Some people worry about that and try to keep up with fashion, some (like me) figure we have our own style, and it matters not one bit what anyone thinks about it.
On that note. When women did begin to join the workforce in numbers, their attire was very limited in what is acceptable. In some parts of the country it is more or less so now. I found that when I lived in Virginia, Ohio, or Iowa, in order to work in an office, I had to dress "business casual." Slacks, skirts, and respectable things. In Washington and now Colorado, I easily can get away with my old Tripp pants I found on Ebay that haven't been produced in ages, and a rock t-shirt if I like. People have purple hair and visible tattoos in this branch of the international software and accounting firm where I work...I don't know that you can get away with that in the Atlanta office, though. The western parts of the US seem a bit more permissive.
Finally, it was my understanding from some of the "older" women I have known, that the whole thing of cutting the hair short and styling it in a sort of hairspray-suspended pouf, has something to do with how some ladies suffer thinning hair as they get older. This style, as one ages and if one does have that problem, hides it with tact. I know a woman who refuses to abandon her long hairstyle, and she now looks like she's (frankly) going bald. It's not a nice look. I'm glad she doesn't care what anyone thinks and is doing her own thing, but I wouldn't find it appealing on a man or a woman, her hair looks straggly. I love my long hair, at age 39, and it doesn't look like it's thinning past the point of looking good, but it's definitely thinner than it was when I was 20. I do have some concerns about whether I can have it long always, or might have to do something else. I most certainly do not want to look like my friend...I think I'd sooner shave it all off entirely, than be balding.
EDIT: Forgot (sorry!) one other factor, after a woman has kids, she might, especially if her partner isn't very helpful, be somewhat overworked and default to clothing as comfortable as what she can get away with, and to heck with fashion. I think this is reasonable. If the husband doesn't care that she is exhausted, and doesn't want to help, why should she care about looking good for his sake?
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Ever been to Sag Harbor?
