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Old 05-12-2019, 03:05 PM
 
9,619 posts, read 7,988,086 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boxus View Post
I am wondering though, those who do have issue with them, is it all of them? Or just those people that have them o the neck, face, hands, etc.

I can see a bit of negativity towards those with a face, neck, etc tattoos, or have their whole body. But some dude with a tattoo on the arm or something, I really cannot understand the negativity.
For me it’s location and type/message. Certain locations are an in your face challenge (like on head not hidden by hair). The type of visible tats can also play a part. Vulgar images and words on an arm while working in the service industry is a big no no. Some images and messages could be polarizing socially or politically. At work you’re strongly encouraged to avoid such topics and you can’t very well avoid such topics if they’re visible at all times. Non-visible areas can be anything you want,...I don’t care.

 
Old 05-12-2019, 03:43 PM
 
11,765 posts, read 6,508,928 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boxus View Post
I suggest she get a different job, lol.

And like quite a few people, death coming knocking at the door often makes them free of restraints they pretty much hated their whole life, and start living how they want.
You're not free of restraints if you get sick, you need to keep your insurance and paycheck in case you need more medical treatment. You don't go poking the boss in the eye.

OP should keep an eye on her and make sure she's not too reckless if she's having some crisis.

I would be upset if DH came home with a tattoo, at this point in life. If he defied the rules at work, I'd be more than upset.
 
Old 05-12-2019, 04:32 PM
 
15,080 posts, read 13,224,305 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tamajane View Post
You're not free of restraints if you get sick, you need to keep your insurance and paycheck in case you need more medical treatment. You don't go poking the boss in the eye.

OP should keep an eye on her and make sure she's not too reckless if she's having some crisis.

I would be upset if DH came home with a tattoo, at this point in life. If he defied the rules at work, I'd be more than upset.
This is why i suggested she get a different job, you know, one where they do not raise a fuss over a damn surgical scar. Who in the hell would even want to work in such an environment is beyond me. For money? There is plenty of work out there without such absurdity.

Yes, restraints. Maybe real or not, but it is all of to the person going through it, not you, me, or anyone. I have seen people escape death and continue life as is, others who are basically a completely different person. No one knows what triggers are going to do to people, the stress triggers from facing things like death.
 
Old 05-12-2019, 04:55 PM
 
9,619 posts, read 7,988,086 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by boxus View Post
This is why i suggested she get a different job, you know, one where they do not raise a fuss over a damn surgical scar. Who in the hell would even want to work in such an environment is beyond me. For money? There is plenty of work out there without such absurdity.

Yes, restraints. Maybe real or not, but it is all of to the person going through it, not you, me, or anyone. I have seen people escape death and continue life as is, others who are basically a completely different person. No one knows what triggers are going to do to people, the stress triggers from facing things like death.
Anyone who served in the military, especially in war, knows the truth of this. I arrived on the USS Iwo Jima LPH-2 around the beginning of November 1990. Few weeks earlier there was a steam leak that killed ten engineers. I was there to replace one of those killed. Because of the complexity of the fire room (aka boiler room) the engineers were the ones dressed out in fire fighting gear and sent into the space to recover the bodies of their friends and shipmates who were killed by superheated steam of over 600 psi and over 800 degrees. What they saw and experienced changed many of them in one way or another. For months some had terrors causing them to scream horrible in their sleep. A few went crazy and had to be restrained and removed from the ship to a mental hospital. Some took to drinking far more than they did before. Some turned it into a positive outcome being more hyper vigilant against such an accident ever happening again and became better sailors. How it effected them in the long term Iíll never know. For me it took about ten years before I rarely ever have the nightmares of some of the things I experienced. A group of people can experience the same traumatic event but they all react differently. Some show no signs until years later when a smell or sound brings it all back.
 
Old 05-12-2019, 07:56 PM
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
18,485 posts, read 22,940,731 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JimG2 View Post
One would think that at 52, she would have outgrown such a thing, but my dear wife announced to me that her 21yo daughter invited her to go get tattoos together today. Same tattoo in the same location. I just don't get it. I have yet to see an attractive tattoo, on anyone, even the three that wifey already has from before we met. I'm 56 and never had any desire for a tattoo and never will. My 26 & 23 yo daughters don't have any tattoos (to the best of my knowledge anyway) and their mother would freak out if they got one. Wifey also has a "no visible tattoos" dress code policy at her employer. With the location she told me, with her dress she wore today to work, it would be highly visible, but she is doing it anyway. She actually had a district manager admonish her because her chest incision from her open heart surgery was partially visible one day. Yes, she survived a heart attack, had heart surgery and just this past week her cardiologist informed her that she has a heart defect. Yet she is getting inked today and risking an infection.



I don't understand tattooing. Somebody enlighten me.

Moderator note to all members: DO NOT resort to bashing and rude posts in this thread. If you do, the thread will be locked.
I understand that you must be concerned with your wife's health, and worried that she could become infected from the tattoo. I also understand that you don't "get" tattoos on any level. There are many people like that. There are just as many who love tattoos, and some who go over the top with tatts. '

Your wife does not seem to fall into the "go over the top" category.

When someone wants a tattoo, there is generally no way to stop them from getting one.

People are motivated to get tattoos for many reasons. Your wife survived a serious surgery. She has a heart defect and she could, in some way, be getting inked because of her survival over heart surgery, and her continued struggle with heart disease.

"Triumph tattoos" are a thing. It helps some people to heal emotionally.

"Bonding tattoos" are also a thing. It sounds as though your wife and her 21 year old daughter are getting a "bonding tattoo". This is a purely emotional choice, what will be difficult if not impossible to prevent. It's a thing between the two of them.

You don't know for sure that your two daughters have not been "inked". If my dad had those attitudes about tattoos (actually, he did) I think I would keep that information from him. (I did) '

You say your wife had tattoos when you met her. Apparently, your dislike of tattoos, did not prevent you from marrying her.

If it sets your mind at ease, most tattoo studios abide by very strict health codes. As long as she has chosen an artist with care, her risk of infection is very low.

Bottom line, your wife can't force you to get a tattoo and you can't prevent her. It sounds as through you love her anyway. Focus on what you love, and let go of what you don't.

What bothers me MOST in this post, is the comment about her chest scar by her district manager. Where does she work? His comment is grossly inappropriate! I am guessing that she works at some kind of chain or fast food place.
Do they have a "no scar" policy? Or, was this just the opinion of the DM? THAT is what would concern me. Perhaps she is not considering her current job as a long term employment prospect.

From what you have written, I wouldn't blame her!
 
Old 05-12-2019, 08:21 PM
 
Location: Lancaster, SC
7,076 posts, read 4,312,984 times
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Tattoos are great conversation starters, which has always been hard for me when I meet someone new. If they have a visible tattoo, it's like an pen invitation to talk to them. Mostly I ask them if it hurt when they got them, LOL
 
Old 05-12-2019, 08:42 PM
 
2,377 posts, read 480,974 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joe the Photog View Post
Tattoos are great conversation starters, which has always been hard for me when I meet someone new. If they have a visible tattoo, it's like an pen invitation to talk to them. Mostly I ask them if it hurt when they got them, LOL
Like I said...the visible ones are for the insecure...
 
Old 05-12-2019, 09:18 PM
 
Location: Coastal New Jersey
54,906 posts, read 53,655,284 times
Reputation: 64661
Quote:
Originally Posted by victimofGM View Post
For me itís location and type/message. Certain locations are an in your face challenge (like on head not hidden by hair). The type of visible tats can also play a part. Vulgar images and words on an arm while working in the service industry is a big no no. Some images and messages could be polarizing socially or politically. At work youíre strongly encouraged to avoid such topics and you canít very well avoid such topics if theyíre visible at all times. Non-visible areas can be anything you want,...I donít care.
For a while there was a guy coming to my church whose whole head was tattooed. I liked sitting behind him to check out the designs if the sermon wasn't holding my attention.
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Old 05-13-2019, 12:33 AM
 
Location: So Cal
14,415 posts, read 10,613,333 times
Reputation: 13565
Quote:
Originally Posted by tamajane View Post
They are a fashion choice, like capris. If posters on a fashion board can opine negatively or positively on other fashion choices, why not tattoos.
Lol, with just about the same level of controversy.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mightyqueen801 View Post
For a while there was a guy coming to my church whose whole head was tattooed. I liked sitting behind him to check out the designs if the sermon wasn't holding my attention.
lol!
 
Old 05-13-2019, 04:16 AM
 
Location: New Britain, CT
737 posts, read 256,938 times
Reputation: 1071
Quote:
Originally Posted by sheena12 View Post

What bothers me MOST in this post, is the comment about her chest scar by her district manager. Where does she work? His comment is grossly inappropriate! I am guessing that she works at some kind of chain or fast food place.
Do they have a "no scar" policy? Or, was this just the opinion of the DM? THAT is what would concern me. Perhaps she is not considering her current job as a long term employment prospect.

From what you have written, I wouldn't blame her!

She is a banker who deals with the public all day. Her male branch manager loves her and her work. It's the female district manager who had an issue with the scar. I'm sure she will wear slacks to work if the district manager is scheduled to show up.


And somebody mentioned pasty white skin....wife calls it "porcelain". It's an all black tattoo on her porcelain skin lower leg.



Funny thing about her 3 previous tattoos is that the only way too see all of two of them is if she is topless. That is only me and her doctors. And I see them all every day as after her medical issues I have to help her dress daily. So if they are only half visible what's the point?
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