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I am convinced: I am being discriminated at my job because I have a large chest. Yes, again with this large boob thread! I am in my 30's and work for a private school in Florida. The average temperature during the school year is about 75. I have thin arms, and a thin waist, but a DD chest. I have a very hard time finding tops that fit well, and I don't have the money to have my clothes tailored (even if there was one around!). ALL my administrators are older, unattractive women (not that it matters, just giving some background). I don't wear tight shirts, or thin strapped tops. I don't wear low cut shirts at all, just simple Vnecks and scoop neck shirts, usually long sleeved. Yet, I always seem to get told that my tops are not appropriate. No further details, just that it's not appropriate. This is usually said to me in front of other coworkers also which I find totally unprofessional. I try to shop for work clothes at higher end stores. Do I need to resort to wearing turtle necks? Do I need to wear shirts that are 2x too big, so my bosses don't think they are too tight?? I have asked the opinion of my friends, coworkers, husband and also my mom (who is almost 70). Everyone has said my tops are appropriate. Does anyone else go through this?? What do I do. I have resorted to constantly wearing a big baggy cardigan, to cover my chest. This is unflattering and usually brings down what I think is a classy outfit. Help
Wow, although I envy you (I really wouldn't mind having that problem) I feel for you. I would say that people at your work are insecure and jealous. This world is so overly concerned with body parts that when someone actually has the goods and are well-endowed everyone thinks you are doing something sexual or wrong. I am really sorry that our society has come to this.
I would say...dress feminine but modestly and if nothing is hanging out don't let those other jealous co-workers get to you. Maybe you could get them all together and explain like you have here that this bothers you. That you are not trying to cause problems but you don't want to wear big baggy clothes or turtlenecks (yuk, I hate turtlenecks). Sometimes just being humble, expressing your frustrations and being real with people will change everything. At least it has for me.
Anyway, enjoy your size...you are envied and admired. Don't ever feel ashamed of how you were made..
I share the problems of several of the women who post here, but mine is much more extreme. I haven't worn a DD since high school- I am a 38F and I have the biggest breasts of pretty much anyone I know. I can't even buy a bra in an American store which is a pain. I am a black woman and I am also just plain curvy, with big hips and thighs and a smaller waist. Most clothing lines are not exactly made to flatter women built like that, so shopping often literally makes me cry.
I am a lawyer so I have to dress professionally daily. I wear Tahari and Jones of New York suits (the latter has great stretch suits). It takes forever to find ones that button down over my chest, but you just have to shop patiently. Under my suits, I wear button-down shirts- trick that I use is to sew them shut between the buttons so they don't pop open. Kind of defeats the purpose of a button-down shirt, but you get the professional look and don't worry about embarrassment.
When I'm not in court, I wear pants (Jones of NY), button-down shirts, or sweaters.
Now the worst thing is having to find a winter coat that buttons over my chest, but that's another story.
And the problem with the suits is that if the jacket fits, the skirt or pants doesn't. I've been buying jackets on Ebay. Black skirt, black pants separately to match.
I wish there was a skinny and attractive woman with DD's at my job. It would make passing the time SOOO much better.
I realize that you may think you are giving the OP a compliment here but honestly guys like you make women have attitudes. What difference does it make if a skinny woman has DD's or B's? Are you that shallow that you see body parts and judge the woman? The OP is having enough problems with woman and co-workers who are judging her body parts, she is coming here for a solution and you are off topic.
So please if you can't help her with the solution go somewhere else. These threads are supposed to stay on topic and you aren't following the rules. Or at least have some respect.
i perceive large chest as part of attractive woman features.
yes attractive women sometimes do get picked on by other women.
unfortunately its not on the EEOC list of discriminated catagories.
another complication is any unfair treatment in a church organization
is often glazed over. the normal tools of EEOC and union are absent.
And the problem with the suits is that if the jacket fits, the skirt or pants doesn't. I've been buying jackets on Ebay. Black skirt, black pants separately to match.
Although I don't have the problem that you gals have, I had several friends in High School that were large and I would often think they were lying about their dislike for their size but then as I went shopping with them I realized that there was a definate problem with clothes. On the other hand I was envious and wished I was larger, lol.. I guess for some of us we are just never happy with what we have.
One thought that comes to mind and I don't know what the expense would be. Could you girls maybe find someone who would make your clothing, especially your tops? I had a few things made for me in the past and it really wasn't that expensive (I loved the items because they were made custom to my preferences). You would be able to design your top, pick out the color and the fabric. It is just a thought and possibly there are some seamstress's that do it on the side as a part-time job or something.
I wish there was a skinny and attractive woman with DD's at my job. It would make passing the time SOOO much better.
LOL!
I remember a teacher I had in 8th grade, Miss Hess was her name at the time. She had one turtleneck she would wear with obviously no bra on, and she was at least a 34D. I could not wait to get to class!
This thread is a year and a half old, not even sure the OP is still around.
We used to have a woman who worked at our office, and she was very large-chested. Her supervisors had to have little chats with her several times. I know about this, because I was also a supervisor, but thankfully not hers. That would be a difficult discussion to have, the woman did feel that she was being unfairly singled out, since we were all women. I can't speak for the OP's situation, but I can say that in ours, no one was jealous. But the woman (who was our age, btw) always wore very tight tops, skin tight. She didn't think she was dressed inappropriately at all, but she was. We really didn't want to sit down at a meeting and be face-to-face with her dimpled cleavage and nipples starkly outlined. Just because her tops fit across the shoulders, she felt that they fit overall, but in reality, they were just too tight across the chest. Way too tight. She needed to go up a size or more, but her vanity stopped her because she thought a larger size was for "fat" people. Again, I'm not saying that this was how the OP was dressing, but in my case I know someone who just didn't know how to dress appropriately in the work-place with her large chest. Eventually she learned how to better shop for her size, we even because friends for several years before we both moved away. My point is, maybe, just maybe the OP here could go up a size or two, so that her cleavage/nipples might not be so obvious, if that is indeed the case. If it is not, I apologize to her. Perhaps another suggestion as already mentioned would be loose tops, and jackets/blazers. There has to be a compromise somewhere.
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These threads are supposed to stay on topic and you aren't following the rules. Or at least have some respect.
