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Old 02-18-2010, 06:56 PM
 
Location: The western periphery of Terra Australis
24,683 posts, read 43,116,816 times
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I think it's a symptom of a shallow society. I don't want to sound sexist but alot of women care far too much what other people are wearing, whether it be their girl-friends or the guys they are checking out. If a guy wears his shorts a little too short, he must be gay, or if some girl wears a top that is 5 years out of date she's a dag. I think it's stupid. You aren't what you wear, it's what's inside that matters. It's also a double standard, because what is cool for one group is not ok for another (within reason, I suppose). People sometimes hound me to dress up better - I don't dress poorly, am neat, tidy and clean, but they make it like it's as if it will make a huge difference - I bet it will with some people - but I don't want to change and pretend to feel accepted.

Guys seem to care alot less about what a girl is wearing, but some girls will even not date a guy because of the type of shoes he's wearing for goodness sake (maybe high-heels or army boots might be a forgivable exception!). I know these superficial thought processes occur mainly in the early stages but from what I read on the net it seems in America in particular it's become a meaningless charade - a ritualised distraction before sex. Why don't people just go about starkers, maybe they'll be less cliqueishness, prejudice and groupism.
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Old 02-18-2010, 07:11 PM
 
9,912 posts, read 12,181,640 times
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I can't even remember what you were wearing.

I think jeans and a t-shirt and runners. I would have no idea if they were from K-Mart or some fancy label shop and I wouldn't really care one way or the other. I have "political" issues with both.

I think as we get older we care less and less about this kind of thing for the most part although I will say Tri, having spent the greater part of my life attempting to get assorted family members of the male variety to dress appropriately for an occasion, that it can become tiresome but ultimately I'm just glad if they show up AND I'll try to work on my embarrassment at sitting in a swanky restaurant with a bloke in tracksuit pants.

I don't think it's as simple as shallow. I think there's what people THINK they're supposed to be doing based on the mental barrage they are assaulted with from an early age and then comes the realization that they're being "groomed" & "indoctrinated" to aspire to the "lifestyle" all in order to control AND extract cash. Once people wake up that these things are not all that important in life in comparison to the other things life throws our way they generally put it down and just get on with the job of living well and happy. Of course being in the age group you are in, you're most likely going to be butting up against it for a while yet, however try to recognize it for what it is, don't become bitter and resentful AND stick to your guns and be true to yourself. Sooner or later people around you will come to accept you for who you are OR they'll be off in a designer frenzy and you'll be too busy leading an interesting life to care.
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Old 02-18-2010, 07:12 PM
 
Location: southern california
55,237 posts, read 72,392,137 times
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bek they are human beings. if you think this is bad try living in another country.
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Old 02-18-2010, 07:45 PM
 
48,519 posts, read 80,998,062 times
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well 'if you were walking down the street and you saw a guy who dressed like a gang memeber what would you think. We all judge by appearance all the time.What we think depends on how they are dressed.
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Old 02-18-2010, 08:29 PM
 
522 posts, read 1,208,317 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trimac20 View Post
I think it's a symptom of a shallow society. I don't want to sound sexist but alot of women care far too much what other people are wearing, whether it be their girl-friends or the guys they are checking out. If a guy wears his shorts a little too short, he must be gay, or if some girl wears a top that is 5 years out of date she's a dag. I think it's stupid. You aren't what you wear, it's what's inside that matters. It's also a double standard, because what is cool for one group is not ok for another (within reason, I suppose). People sometimes hound me to dress up better - I don't dress poorly, am neat, tidy and clean, but they make it like it's as if it will make a huge difference - I bet it will with some people - but I don't want to change and pretend to feel accepted.

Guys seem to care alot less about what a girl is wearing, but some girls will even not date a guy because of the type of shoes he's wearing for goodness sake (maybe high-heels or army boots might be a forgivable exception!). I know these superficial thought processes occur mainly in the early stages but from what I read on the net it seems in America in particular it's become a meaningless charade - a ritualised distraction before sex. Why don't people just go about starkers, maybe they'll be less cliqueishness, prejudice and groupism.
You obviously haven't met the men I have. From my experience men are just as shallow as women when it comes to fashion. My last boyfriend cared way too much about what others thought of him. Good lord, he spent more time getting ready than I do. I mean, I like a guy that takes care of himself but there's a line. Heck, he's even suggested I should wear this or that. Drove me nuts.
Anyway, my last ex wasn't the only come like that that I've come across. I've actually met more than I care to remember (all straight by the way).

Shallowness is not exclusively an American thing. I've frequent other forums for other countries (outside of CD. I get bored and wonder what people on the other side of the world are up to) and they're just as shallow. The shoe thing I've never heard of until I visited Gumtree.com.

Anyway, we all make judgments about people we don't know. It's human nature. Animals do it. If a predator notices a prey in a herd acting differently, sickly or hurt it'll target that specific animal as it's next meal. Fashion to many people is a way to express themselves, how we dress is sort of a glimpse of our personality.
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Old 02-18-2010, 08:33 PM
 
Location: Florida
335 posts, read 1,101,526 times
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I think it is human nature to pass judgment on what is different from what a person was raised to believe what is "normal".
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Old 02-18-2010, 08:35 PM
 
5,258 posts, read 7,787,752 times
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I think a lot of it has to do with the types of places you hang out. I've noticed that a lot of people who hang out at swanky ultralounges tend to be more judgmental than those who frequent sports bars (which I prefer). At least that's what I've observed.
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Old 02-18-2010, 08:41 PM
NCN
 
Location: NC/SC Border Patrol
21,136 posts, read 21,121,261 times
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John T. Molloy has written several books on the subject. You might want to get one and read it. The way a person dresses, eats, walks, etc. lets you know how they feel about themselves and they know themselves much better than any of us do.

I read the books "Color me a Season" and the first "Dress for Success" book and get many compliments about the clothes I wear. The smarter a person is the more presentable they will be able to make themselves. Fads are for the foolish. The only thing fad clothes does for a person is make them poor. I can spend much less money and look better than people who follow the fads.

I have added a new book to the list that has nothing to do with the title. It is "The science of sexy" and is about dressing for your body type. It is another book about putting your best foot forward. So three ways to dress are by color, style, and body type.

I can usually tell about income, living style, etc. by looking at the way a person dresses, but once I met a girl I would have thought was a rich playgirl and found out she shopped in thrift stores. She just had very good taste in clothing. This was a little shocking for me because I can usually pick out a thrift store shopper in a minute. She was the exception.

One thing a person should think about is that you only wear one outfit at a time, so quality and not quantity is better.

Last edited by NCN; 02-18-2010 at 08:53 PM..
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Old 02-18-2010, 08:56 PM
 
Location: Albuquerque, NM
13,295 posts, read 12,341,071 times
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Quote:
Why do people judge you so much on what clothes you wear?
Because it is easier than taking the time to get to know someone.

Because it is left over from a more dangerous time in human history when we needed to make snap judgements about who was friend and who was foe

Because we no longer live in small communities of 100's of people and live in communities of 1,000,000's of people and we need to divide those groups up in to 'us' and 'them'.
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Old 02-18-2010, 09:32 PM
 
770 posts, read 705,352 times
Reputation: 608
It's not a shallow society. It's human nature. Sure you can go to Calcutta and get judged less by your fashion sense, but you will be judged in other ways relative to the socioeconomic realities of the locals.
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