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Old 12-20-2015, 01:12 PM
Status: "Brexit bound" (set 1 day ago)
 
3,616 posts, read 1,983,544 times
Reputation: 5202

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Quote:
Originally Posted by CampingMom View Post
Good evening,

One of my kids moved to FL to get away from the riff raff in our area of Upstate NY. That being said, child (23 years old to clarify) has a misdemeanor on the record. We had child arrested after drug use got so bad, we caught the child stealing. We attempted to get the judge, DA, probation officer to mandate child to long term rehab-we'd foot the bill. Nope, judge for a first offense sent child to county jail for a year, didn't get child clean. Finally child had enough and did do rehab. Clean and sober since last January. So that's now following the chances for child to get a job. Child was leaving on December 15th after two months of being turned down for work.

Child has been renting a room in a mobile home. The "landlord" moved a friend in with a child. There's been issues for weeks with that-CPS keeps showing up there and there are now 8 people living in a two bedroom home. Along with the power being cut for two weeks due the the other tenant not paying the bill. Already we get the sense this was a set up and told said child to get out of there, didn't need those headaches. Head back North.

So said child went out one evening. When pulling back into driveway, a neighbor who never had said two words before, drove over on a golf cart screaming at my child with another woman in the cart. The second woman jumped out of the cart and started toward my child with raised hands. My child shoved her away-this occured on the property of the mobile home. The person fell down in the grass. My child got back in the car to back away and come home later. They called the police. My child was charged with abuse of a elderly person(she's actually 58). And attempted assault with a vehicle. Taken to jail on 10K bond. We were floord with the call at 3am!

Now, told said child never should hand come up. Self defense won't give her a leg to stand on. Hired an attorney because we found out the elder abuse is for 65 and up. This woman has a rap sheet as long as Florida. From drug possession, DWI, Menacing, disturbance of the peace etc. The judge wouldn't drop the bail either. We hired an attorney as theirs too many holes in the story.

Here's a 23 year old, who now will be homeless in a week. Can't leave FL due to pending court and a high bond. Just as things were starting to come around-no longer using is huge and being sober for close to a year even better. We are a upper middle class household. Child played field hockey and was captain, varsity golf too. Just as it was getting better, now this.

What can we expect to possibly happen? Took the anger management class this past weekend. Court now isn't until February. Has been clean and sober for year. But will lose where has been staying due to court. Any suggestions? Not a bad kid at all. We are talking Girl Scouts, varsity sports, travel team, etc material. Not a angel by any means, but deserves better than this. How would you handle this?

What does your husband think about this situation ?
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Old 12-20-2015, 02:18 PM
 
16,992 posts, read 20,598,336 times
Reputation: 33956
Quote:
Originally Posted by CampingMom View Post
She's clean and sober. Period. She's not doing drugs, she's not drinking, nothing. Her Grandmother is Sybil reincarnate. She only sees Grandchildren when she wants to. She lives her life-not around her family-they are afterthoughts. My MIL is not the nicest of person and I am glad she lives in that state.

My daughter signed a lease to rent one room. The "agent" signed in all these other people. Same day they moved in-she contacted the agent. She wanted out of the lease. Simple. She didn't want to live in that environment had she known when she stepped foot in to that real estate office to get a place. People rent rooms all the time, our listings here are full of them. She wanted more of a boarding house, but they don't seem to exist there. She's signing on for a studio apartment tomorrow. Near the school she's going to. Until then, she's in her car. She was totally scammed by that agent-who is also the owner of the said mobile home.

My daughter has busted tail to keep herself on the straight. She has a wonderful sponsor, goes daily to meetings and even leads some. All I asked was about legal stuff. Instead, I've been getting everyone's armchair opinions to what we should be doing or what she should be. Even with tough love we have been giving-she's on her own-deal with things as an adult, we get called out. It's darned if you do, and darned if you don't. We gave her tough love. We let the legal system do it's thing before and it totally left me with a nasty taste. A judge who put her in jail for a first offense, yet during the times we'd go in, we'd see the same people revolve through there with new charges, worse than hers and just get fined. It's a system that's failed and broken. When someone who had 3 DWI's in two years gets nothing but a suspended license again, my daughter gets to spend a year in jail because she was struggling with addiction. It's a horrible disease. Too many of these young kids are getting into it. You never know who. I pity any of you if you end up in my shoes. It could be any one of you. Yes, my husband could go down. Does he want to, no. It's an expense I just don't have right now. She did live in NC for the last year working and living in OBX near the rehab she went to. But it was too dependent on the summer crowds to make a living in the winter months. She did the same thing there, rented a room by the month.

Thank you all for just about no advice, but the lot of you are quick to make judgements, telling us she's a junkie, and being small minded. I asked for what the legal system there might do. Instead I get what this whole thread looks like. She's a junkie. She's a junkie. She actually is a very strong individual who is making great strides to stay clean and sober. She's always going to be a addict. But she's not going to let it define her rest of her life. You all have proved something to me. Like my late Mother used to say. "Christianity left the church a long time ago". Sure has.
Well if grandma is so horrible why did you not mention that before, you said "grandma is 45 minutes away". Didn't occur to you if your daughter ran into trouble the only relative she has isn't one she could get help from?

And she goes from NC due to seasonal work to a state like FL? FL is know for seasonal service industry jobs, you have people who depend on the "snowbirds".

She has only been clean and sober a short time. FL for addicts is like Las Vegas for gamblers.

If this woman is an "agent" than report her. Or is she just some person who rents out a mobile home. You have to ask yourself what kind of people would be comfortable cramming 8 people into two bedrooms. I can only think of two kinds, illegal migrant workers and those with issues such as your daughter.

There are plenty of people who rents rooms in their home. There were no elderly women who looked to rent a room? Something isn't adding up with this 8 people in one house scenario. Sounds like a "crash pad".

Sorry I don't think you're getting the whole story from your daughter.

Your husband needs to get down there. He can stay at his mother's house and ask to use her car if need be if money is that tight. He is not working in NY, you are, he goes.

And the last state you head to get away from "riff raff" is FL. It's where "riff raff" go. Not saying your daughter is one, but talk about going from the frying pan in upstate NY into the fire. Last place you go with her issues.
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Old 12-20-2015, 03:58 PM
 
Location: Spring Hill Florida
12,135 posts, read 13,207,142 times
Reputation: 6009
It's flakka, a synthetic crystal like drug imported from China. College kids deal it because it returns an amazing profit. Street gangs are also into dealing it because of the wild profit possibilities.
It's cheap and very dangerous. It basically destroys the brain. Broward County accounts for 20 percent of flakka cases nationwide. The drug has been spreading toward Palm Beach County, Miami and Orlando.
It is popular in Chicago, Houston and New York City and in rural states like Kentucky. It wont be long before it hits the streets in LA.

"Pill mills" are basically history. The laws have changed and the doctors who were prescribing the narcotics
like candy are in jail or have had their Florida licenses revoked. Georgia, Ohio, Texas, and a few others all had the same problem. It's greed. People have been using prescription drugs in unintended ways for decades. Its not a new phenomenon.

So, if you want to trash another state, get the facts straight.



Quote:
Originally Posted by seain dublin View Post
I'm sorry for your troubles but an addict/alcoholic will always be one, even when they're clean 10 years.

I understand you view your adult child as your child, but why than did you not say "FL isn't a good idea"(it is known as the pill mill state). It's like sending someone with a gambling addiction to Las Vegas.

In fact FL just made the national news for some new drug "Flecka" I think it is called. It's cheap to buy, causes very hot body temperatures, paranoia, violent behavior. It's coming out of Ft. Lauderdale.

Why didn't she go live with grandma, who is 45 minutes away from where she is in FL in the first place? Why with strangers?

At least if she had moved in with grandma, grandma could have kept an eye on her.

You don't want to hear it, but the poster who said something is wrong when you have 8 people living in a house with no electricity was spot on. Nobody lives like that other than hard core junkies.

You said grandma is out of town, so why she can't stay there? Most grandmothers would let their grandchild stay in their home, might even want a house sitter. Only reason they wouldn't is if the adult grandchild isn't trustworthy. Grandma doesn't want to come home and find 4 strangers living in her home who are "zonked out" or find the TV, car, jewelry all gone as well as the grandchild.

Why didn't you send the daughter down to NC/VA where you have family and plan on moving yourself?

Sorry FL was a bad choice given her background. With the exception being if she was staying with grandma or another family member who could keep an eye on her.
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Old 12-20-2015, 05:27 PM
 
Location: Savannah, GA
1,463 posts, read 3,164,585 times
Reputation: 880
Quote:
Originally Posted by markjames68 View Post
She needs help. First you said you were 'upper middle class' in your initial post, now you're broke and can't afford anything yet you suggest she turn down assistance.

She is clean yet find herself associating with undesirable people. She is on the straight and narrow but gets charged with elder abuse.

Lots of excuses here. Again, good luck. Being an addict is tough and I hope she continues to get help.
I am considered upper middle class here. But I am trying to hold it all together with a salary under 40K, I won't lose my house and fight for everything I have. I have a inheritance I am being a Scrooge with until my husband finds a job.

She didn't associate with undesirable people-the real estate agent she went to there scammed her! She went to a legit office to rent and has a lease through the office.

She got charged with Elder Abuse because this woman jumped out of her golf cart-who is 58-high as a kite going after MY daughter. She pushed her away-she fell on her butt. The woman has a rap sheet on DWI's, child abuse, disturbing the peace, multiple drug possessions etc.

I will repeat, she is CLEAN and SOBER! We went to a NAMED BRAND real estate group there and we got scammed. Woman who is the agent should lose her license there in Florida. She is starting school at the Pinellas Technical College there. That's why she moved.

I am not making excuses. I want to find out about the legal stuff. Sigh.
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Old 12-20-2015, 05:32 PM
 
Location: Savannah, GA
1,463 posts, read 3,164,585 times
Reputation: 880
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roscoe Conkling View Post
What does your husband think about this situation ?
He's not happy. We'd talked with this agent before she signed any lease. We were told she had the mobile home and she had two bedrooms in it. No other tenants at the time. He is angry. We've tried to call the agent, but she will not respond. Makes me wonder if she left the agency she was with two months ago. He is going to head down, just when we can get the money to do so. His mother isn't an option to stay with. So he's going to stay with our daughter while this all get's hashed out.

Like you all have said, he's not working.
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Old 12-20-2015, 05:41 PM
 
Location: Lakewood Ranch, FL
5,311 posts, read 8,127,264 times
Reputation: 6376
Quote:
Originally Posted by CampingMom View Post
She's not a welfare case. I refuse to teach my children to use these agencies. I've told them you stand on your own feet and don't rely on the rest of society to pay your way. I know some do need the help. But my daughter is able bodied and if she wants things in life, needs to bust her tail for them. I have had no experience with them either. No one in my family ever has. I appreciate the advice, but I know these places help some of the same ilk she needs to avoid. It's reality and the truth. I was brought up by doing what ever it takes to keep your self supported, no matter how many hours or jobs it takes. My parents grew up during the Depression. That's a whole different way of growing up and learning to not live beyond your means. My kids have all learned that. If you can't pay cash, you don't need it.
Well, perhaps if you would explain what it is you actually want to know by posting here, it might help. I had the impression that you were looking for advice you could pass along to your daughter regarding a housing solution and maybe a temporary job. As I said, I don't know if 2-1-1 has those answers for her but either she is capable of researching her own solutions or she needs your help. If you know of another, better, starting place than 2-1-1, maybe you could share it here. My understanding is that they are only a referral service.
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Old 12-20-2015, 06:15 PM
 
16,992 posts, read 20,598,336 times
Reputation: 33956
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spring Hillian View Post
It's flakka, a synthetic crystal like drug imported from China. College kids deal it because it returns an amazing profit. Street gangs are also into dealing it because of the wild profit possibilities.
It's cheap and very dangerous. It basically destroys the brain. Broward County accounts for 20 percent of flakka cases nationwide. The drug has been spreading toward Palm Beach County, Miami and Orlando.
It is popular in Chicago, Houston and New York City and in rural states like Kentucky. It wont be long before it hits the streets in LA.

"Pill mills" are basically history. The laws have changed and the doctors who were prescribing the narcotics
like candy are in jail or have had their Florida licenses revoked. Georgia, Ohio, Texas, and a few others all had the same problem. It's greed. People have been using prescription drugs in unintended ways for decades. Its not a new phenomenon.

So, if you want to trash another state, get the facts straight.
It took a long time for FL to finally get it on the books that someone couldn't doctor shop and get scripts for OxyContin, it's the land of a day late and a dollar short. People were pouring in from other states, to get a simple database going just to prevent people from picking up 3 scripts for pain pills from Publix, CVS and Walgreens took forever.

Other states had it on the books for years, cross checking worked there, but FL took years to get one in place.

You get your story straight, flakka is the new drug in FL, it will spread, but once again FL is involved.

If you have an issue with that contact ABC Evening News, they're the ones reporting it as Ft. Lauderdale, FL being ground zero for the drug.

Don't shoot the messenger.
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Old 12-20-2015, 06:16 PM
 
16,992 posts, read 20,598,336 times
Reputation: 33956
Quote:
Originally Posted by CampingMom View Post
He's not happy. We'd talked with this agent before she signed any lease. We were told she had the mobile home and she had two bedrooms in it. No other tenants at the time. He is angry. We've tried to call the agent, but she will not respond. Makes me wonder if she left the agency she was with two months ago. He is going to head down, just when we can get the money to do so. His mother isn't an option to stay with. So he's going to stay with our daughter while this all get's hashed out.

Like you all have said, he's not working.

Glad to hear your husband is heading down. I hope it works out for your family.
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Old 12-20-2015, 06:58 PM
 
Location: Spring Hill Florida
12,135 posts, read 13,207,142 times
Reputation: 6009
You do understand anyone anywhere could doctor shop. The pill mill problem, here and elsewhere was doctors setting up office for the sole purpose of selling prescriptions and had nothing to do with FL law.

You can still doctor shop here collecting scripts along the way. Its just hard to find doctors that freely prescribe narcotics unless they can see through testing and prior medical records first. The "my back hurts" complaint would lead to an MRI to find out why the patients back hurts before starting a patient on narcotics.

6 years ago FL began keeping databases on who prescribes what to whom and alerts if it detects abusive trends. Other states did the same thing around then, so "pill mills" in FL haven been gone a while. Oh, by the way, California has just brought in CURES which works a lot like the FL system which has been in use for 5 years.

Flakka can be bought overseas for $1,000 for kilo. Sold to a U.S. wholesaler for $4,000 it gets broken down for sale on the street becomes $40,000 to $50,000 in $5 doses. That is an amazing profit. Once the body count gets high enough use may dwindle, probably wont. Doesnt matter where it lands in the US it will spread like wildfire and be like the crack cocaine craze.

It was recently DISCOVERED in FL and is also in California.

http://harborvillageflorida.com/blog/flakka-infects-california-dupes-drug-tests-and-patients-are-slow-to-recover/"

http://drugrehabcenters99.blogspot.c...upes-drug.html


Quote:
Originally Posted by seain dublin View Post
It took a long time for FL to finally get it on the books that someone couldn't doctor shop and get scripts for OxyContin, it's the land of a day late and a dollar short. People were pouring in from other states, to get a simple database going just to prevent people from picking up 3 scripts for pain pills from Publix, CVS and Walgreens took forever.

Other states had it on the books for years, cross checking worked there, but FL took years to get one in place.

You get your story straight, flakka is the new drug in FL, it will spread, but once again FL is involved.

If you have an issue with that contact ABC Evening News, they're the ones reporting it as Ft. Lauderdale, FL being ground zero for the drug.

Don't shoot the messenger.
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Old 12-21-2015, 07:57 PM
 
17,432 posts, read 10,510,439 times
Reputation: 8328
Quote:
Originally Posted by CampingMom View Post
He's not happy. We'd talked with this agent before she signed any lease. We were told she had the mobile home and she had two bedrooms in it. No other tenants at the time. He is angry. We've tried to call the agent, but she will not respond. Makes me wonder if she left the agency she was with two months ago. He is going to head down, just when we can get the money to do so. His mother isn't an option to stay with. So he's going to stay with our daughter while this all get's hashed out.

Like you all have said, he's not working.
You need an attorney. Your husband should look for one. Your daughter may be clean but she appears to be naive and should have done something about the excessive people there. Ok she didn't and she met an idiot. Now get an attorney and sue the woman who created the confrontation and the realty. You need to be able to do that to prove your daughter's story in court.
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