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I lived in Jupiter for a few years, in Abacoa, which is a planned community (but not gated).
Tequesta is the most "Old Florida" of your options. In terms of pretensiousness and materialism, it goes Tequesta the least, then Jupiter, and now Palm Beach Gardens in the past 8 years or so has had many many multi million dollar developments go up.
All are great towns though. Safe, clean, etc. Tequesta is "least pleasing to the eye," but it's still nice (it feels the oldest) and I'd rank Gardens and Jupiter as about the same in niceness. Gardens has more built up commercial options, however.
Don't forget Juno Beach as an option, however!
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