[southern no more]

Is there an area in central east coast FL that would be a good fit for a family that is open minded, free thinkers, that do not believe in religion? We have a 6 yr old so it would need to be in a safe place with good schools. We are tired of feeling like fish out of water around this heavily religious, close minded, unsafe state we live in now (GA). Any suggestions? Port Orange, New Smyrna Beach, Ormond, Melbourne? Or are we totally off track in our search? Thank you!!!

[southern no more]

Moderator cut: off topic Can we get back to the question... what was it??,,, Oh yeah....where to live... in FL.

[ferretlady4719]

SouthernNoMore, I don't think you'll run into the same problems in FL. I lived throughout different areas of central FL almost my entire life & although I knew both devout Christians & non-believers, as well as folks with all sorts of varying spiritual beliefs, I never encountered the type of "religiousity" that I think you're referring to. Although I never spent any significant time there, from what I understand, parts of the panhandle are much more "southern" than other areas of FL. But I never had any issues all over the central part of the state....

We're currently in a small town in AL & it sounds as if you're in a town like ours, where people get a bit carried away, to put it mildly. I have NO problems at all with any form of religion, my best friend is a devout Christian, and I've got friends who are pagans. BUT, if you get into one of those "pockets" of religious fervor, it *can* get very old after a while, that people simply will NOT accept the fact that you don't believe exactly as they do.

When we first moved in here, several neighbors came by to greet us. Seemed such a nice gesture! One lady, before even introducing herself or asking our names, asked if we had selected a church yet. We told her "No, we don't really go to church". She got a look on her face as if we'd told her we ate fried spiders for dinner.. "You don't GO to church at all?" "No ma'am, we generally don't". "OH! Well, welcome to the neighborhood I guess" and she scurried off as if she thought we might have a contagious disease. To this day, we've passed by her & said 'hello' or waved to her in passing - she quickly walks away without a word anytime she sees us. One day while we were sitting out on our front porch, we overheard her talking to our next-door neighbor, saying, "You probably should be careful talking to *those* people - they don't even go to church!"

Neighbors across the street -- husband is not from this area & he has been fairly friendly to us all along. Wife is a devoted church-goer raised here & initially, for almost 9 months, EVERY Sunday without fail, she was really pressuring us to come with her to church, even though we always politely declined. THEN came the first Halloween that we decorated & did trick-or-treats for the kids. We love doing stuff on the holidays, and it was particularly fun here as there were a lot of young kids around. Well, neighbor-wife saw us "do Halloween" and from then on, we've been devil worshipers. She told us that right to our faces! When we tried to say anything to the effect that, "we're just having fun, Halloween has NO religious significance to us at all, so please don't worry - we are NOT devil worshipers" Her response to that was that we could be worshiping the devil without realizing it. That if we honestly believe that we're NOT devil worshipers, then that means the devil *really* has us in his power, because he even has us blinded to the fact that we're serving him. Say what???? HOW can you argue with that kind of thinking? LOL!!!

What little contact we have with her any more, she is either semi-angry at us, hard-core 'preaching' at us & trying to 'save our souls' or she gets this pitying look on her face & tells us that she's STILL praying for us, that we'll get loose of Satan's clutches & turn to God someday. ????????

On a milder level, it seems that almost *anyone* we meet, if you're lucky you might get as far as a name introduction & one or two quick bits of friendly talk -- then "You need to come to our church sometime! We got to... (insert church name here...)" Almost always phrased that way, "you *need* to come to our church..." not a polite, 'we'd love to have you visit our church...' or some such....

On average, twice a week, someone will show up at our door, passing our literature, or flyers about some event coming up at their church, and they could put aggressive seasoned salesmen to shame. We try to be polite, "Thank you, but we're not interested..." But they won't take a simple no for an answer, they just keep on & on until you've had to tell them "no" at least four or five times. Odds are, the *same* person will be right back on your doorstep the next week again.

I could go on & on.... but after 3 years of this non-stop, it IS very old & I'm looking forward to being back in FL, where just *maybe* I can talk to someone for five whole minutes straight without church being the focus of the conversation.

Those who have never encountered people like this - I'm truly glad for you, that you haven't!!! And you probably think I'm exaggerating or making things up. Believe me, I wish I was!! Until we moved here, I'd never run into people like this before either - I'd heard some mention of it, but didn't really believe that it could be as bad as it is. Again, I don't have a problem with religion, and I've had some very interesting lengthy discussions with different friends about their faiths, and I have strongly held beliefs of my own. But I AM very very sick of either being treated like a pariah or having people repeatedly try to force their beliefs on me. It's almost as if they think if they just keep hammering away at me long enough, no matter how pushy & rude they might be -- sooner or later, they'll "save my soul" and I guess they'll get brownie points or something.....

I have all respect in the world for people with deep spiritual beliefs who actually LIVE their faith, but I am fed up with people who are overly pushy about "religion" & simply will NOT refrain from cramming it down your throat no matter what. If SouthernNoMore is in the midst of people like that, I can totally understand why "avoiding religious people" would be a concern. But again, SouthernNoMore, at least in my personal experience, I never encountered that sort of thing anywhere that I lived in Florida.

[Scientifical Madness]

People in FL, atleast many of them, especially transplants are so "go-go-go" and many are all about themselves, so asking you questions about religion probably isnt going to happen, like it would in the panhandle or more rural FL. In some places in FL, you'd be lucky to even get a head nod acknowledging one another or a "hi."

[southern no more]

Thank you for some insight on this. Yes Ferretlady you seem to understand where I am coming from on this problem. I am not so concerned about myself and husband, but I do not want my daughter being hounded by people and made to feel she is doomed for her beliefs. If people are into their own business we should be ok. I just know there are usually more liberal minded areas than others, but unfortunately sometimes you must live in an area that is not as safe as others to achieve that. I suppose you have to wiegh all things out. Thanks for the help and THANK YOU moderator for keeping things on track!!

[Scientifical Madness]

Originally Posted by southern no more

Thank you for some insight on this. Yes Ferretlady you seem to understand where I am coming from on this problem. I am not so concerned about myself and husband, but I do not want my daughter being hounded by people and made to feel she is doomed for her beliefs. If people are into their own business we should be ok. I just know there are usually more liberal minded areas than others, but unfortunately sometimes you must live in an area that is not as safe as others to achieve that. I suppose you have to wiegh all things out. Thanks for the help and THANK YOU moderator for keeping things on track!!

Depending on where in FL you choose, I'd be more concerned for the quality of schools in the area, the crime, and the terrible driving (this is no longer your Gramma's Florida) than that of people's overly religious views. My 2 cents.

[SoFLGal]

I'd look to the Sarasota area. The school system is one of the best in Florida. The beaches are terrific, especially Siesta Key Beach. They have a huge arts community. The downtown area is very eclectic and has kind of a hippie vibe. There's lots to do in Sarasota or close by.

The only place I'd even consider on the other coast (east coast) is Jupiter.

[ACTS Mom]

Originally Posted by Scientifical Madness

People in FL, atleast many of them, especially transplants are so "go-go-go" and many are all about themselves, so asking you questions about religion probably isnt going to happen, like it would in the panhandle or more rural FL. In some places in FL, you'd be lucky to even get a head nod acknowledging one another or a "hi."

You're right about that...we've lived in the same place for almost 17 years and it's not like we live in a mega development either. Yet there are many "neighbors" to whom we've never spoken...or have never spoken to us. I wouldn't have a clue what their names are unless I look up there address on the property appraisers website!!

AS a matter of fact, I'd actually appreciate someone INVITING us to their church. Seems nobody around here wants to bring up the subject. Of course maybe they're afraid they'll offend someone, so it just isn't a subject that's widely discussed.

[Scientifical Madness]

^^^ "You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to ACTS Mom again."

[annerk]

I've never been asked what church I attended since moving here five years ago.