Theory about those who dislike Florida (motel, income, crime)

[vacationsover]

Ineedachange,

I am kind of a people person. Everywhere I've lived, until now, I have been able to at least make good acquaintances within a couple of months. I agree it takes time to make true friends.

This is just the most unsocial place I've ever lived. It might be in-part because of the rules here. I'm sitting here thinking about how I would initially start conversation in my old neighborhoods. Typically it was by walking around the neighborhood and seeing someone working on their car, porch, or something in their front yard or driveway. I would make comment about what they are working on. Things led from there. Well, here you can't work on anything on your property, so that takes that conversation opportunity out. It also makes it so less people are out front doing anything to even be able to physically see your neighbor! Another way I would meet people is that I would go on a walk with my kids and we'd see a child playing outside - in the front yard. So my child and their child would talk, I would talk with that child's parents. Well here, you pretty much have to keep your child's toys - therefore your child - hidden in the back yard - which makes it hard to just run into someone on a walk.

I have met a couple of neighbors, but only one of them seems honestly comfortable with me just knocking on her door to visit without prior notice. She and her son also come over my house on occasion.

[INeedAChange]

One last thing you could try is to join some kind of activity group that you enjoy that meets a few times a months (if you can find a babysitter for the kids).

Otherwise maybe it's not your kind of place. I've seen other people complain about Palm Coast on here, that it's too isolated from stores and other towns.

Originally Posted by vacationsover

Ineedachange,

I am kind of a people person. Everywhere I've lived, until now, I have been able to at least make good acquaintances within a couple of months. I agree it takes time to make true friends.

This is just the most unsocial place I've ever lived. It might be in-part because of the rules here. I'm sitting here thinking about how I would initially start conversation in my old neighborhoods. Typically it was by walking around the neighborhood and seeing someone working on their car, porch, or something in their front yard or driveway. I would make comment about what they are working on. Things led from there. Well, here you can't work on anything on your property, so that takes that conversation opportunity out. It also makes it so less people are out front doing anything to even be able to physically see your neighbor! Another way I would meet people is that I would go on a walk with my kids and we'd see a child playing outside - in the front yard. So my child and their child would talk, I would talk with that child's parents. Well here, you pretty much have to keep your child's toys - therefore your child - hidden in the back yard - which makes it hard to just run into someone on a walk.

I have met a couple of neighbors, but only one of them seems honestly comfortable with me just knocking on her door to visit without prior notice. She and her son also come over my house on occasion.

[vacationsover]

It's hard for me to join a group because I work a lot. The groups that I have found like the golf club - I don't begin to know how to golf or have any real interest in learning- but I could join it just for socialization. The fees are way out of my price range. Then there's the heritage clubs - same thing - fees are out of my range. Another thing that bothers me about this area is that they segregate the ages everywhere. I guess no-one does any family activities here other than chores! The only thing that I have found that I can afford to join and lets my kids and me spend time together as well as meet neighbors is the local public pool. We have been there a few times. The couple of people that I have talked to a little bit say they go to this local place - European Village a lot and said I should go. I can't afford that either! I really need to just meet neighbors that I can, when we're off work, get together with at each other's houses and have a cup of tea and maybe watch a TV show or something. That's what we did everywhere else I lived. I never had to join a club and pay membership fees to meet and hang out with my neighbors!!

I know this really isn't the place for me. But I don't have the money to move and don't want to change my kids' schools again. So I have to figure out someway to either meet people or just make my job my life.

I have already told my older daughter that since she is going to be a freshman in high school this year, maybe instead of focusing on friends and a social life, she should just study more. She's always made good grades, but maybe she can be a straight 'A' student in high school and get a good scholarship.

I keep trying to like it here. I keep thinking about the nice weather. No snow!!

[hollys0822]

Originally Posted by HengyMama

I have lived in Florida almost my whole live (39 years). We moved here when I was five years old and it used to be a nice place but now the housing is horrible, the cost of living is very high (Comcast cable and internet 90.00 a month), the wages are low. And if you have ever had a water claim with your home owners insurance, you are declared uninsurable. The people here are rude, teenagers are disrespectful, the schools stink, property taxes are outrageous, the sand is hard to grow a garden in, the pine pollen is horrible, the bugs carry you away, you can live in a rural area with a neighbor that reves his stock car all day and there is nothing you can do about it, gas prices are high, electric companies take you for a ride, boom boxes everywhere, the only one that smiles is the cashier at the grocery store and only when the manager is looking, you go into any store and ask for an item and they say, "no we don't carry that" and then you look and find the item.....can't tell you how many times this has happened, restaurant service stinks, it's smothering hot for months at a time, can barely breathe from May to October....it's so hot, the beaches are full of half naked people, the springs are full of drunk rednecks, no where to take the little ones. Guess that's about it till someone else ticks me off.

Oh.....and the grass does not grow very well because of the sand.

I was just reading old posts about Florida and came across yours. All the things that you have described could be anywhere. Even here in New Hampshire. I think the teenage attitude is a global thing. I don't have a front lawn cuz of sand and I live in the mountains, real estate prices, taxes all that stuff has gone through the roof all the way to the moon.


We get hot in the summer, but not like you but in the winter, watch out. If you manage to actually get to work on the ice and snow without crashing, sliding into something or in one piece it is a good day although it probably took an extra hour or two cuz of the snow and other drivers. Won't get started on that. Wind chill that will freeze your skin in less than twenty minutes, better cover up. Kids go stircrazy, too cold outside to even play in the snow., on and on. But dont' forget the darkness, from about October to April, feels like living in a tomb.

Wanna trade problems? Guess it is all a matter of perspective. Sometimes if you smile at people and say hi, they will say hi and smile back. Sometimes not. But worth a try?

Hi and a smile

[Ladywithafan]

I've moved from one town to another. In order to meet people with similar interests, I volunteered for the Sarasota Film Festival. I started two years ago and I've made some of the nicest friends within that network. It cost me nothing to help out & even was paid this year as an independent contractor.

[Lake_Lanier_Man]

Originally Posted by established

Let me try to explain my use of mooch, though I thought I clarified that in my original posts.

There are people on this board that inquire about the lifestyle of living in Fl. I gave you facts. I 'query' the defensiveness of those who take offense.

MOOCH is coming home from work in Fl, after a hard days work. Finding an RV of farmers in thier drive who is a 'friend' of a 'friend'. Exploiting hospitality.

For years, there were ongoing jokes in Fl about the mooches. We'd all been through it thanks to their 'yearning' to be a part of a culture they could not fathom. THEY come into your home, talk 'crap', pay for nothing and insult out of their jealousies.

And if you think I dont' know, keep dreaming. When I referred to mooches, I mean these vagabonds I am speaking of. Retirees? Yep, mooch in a way. I explained that.

Triple dippers? Explained.

Corruption and cops? Almost any cop now admits they will not jeopardize their lives by going into drug dealers territory. Then get the badge off and let a man do the job you won't.

Look, You are defensive to the word mooch for personal reasons. If it fits, it fits. Clean up your reasons for wanting to come to Fl (free ride on relatives, etc).

Just keep it where you belong. K? This post was meant to help mature people who might have been considering moving to Fl because of a job opportunity. My attempt to help them have a clearer picture of life in Fl. It's your defensiveness that caused you to not accept it in the vien it was meant. I KNOW who you are!

I think I know what you mean by mooching established. Its like my buddy we both got accepted to UF (which is the only thing the the state of Florida has going for it right now) but we were from Georgia so out of state tuition killed us. Due to the fact I have relatives in Yule (small town north of Jacksonville) we had connections and therefore an address. So if your familiar with Floridas "loose laws" that pretty much meant we were state residents when we had only been there for 2 months. Hell I never even brought it up when I was in college. When you 17 you really think your cheating the system. I thought we doing something so clever and incospicous but toward graduation I realized that plenty of other people were doing the same con job. Now I am back in Georgia going to college for free on the HOPE scholarship working toward another degree.

[topajodo]

Originally Posted by ShepsMom

I came here at age of 19 and i had a 1 year old son. So, this makes me how old now? Don't you just hate being totally wrong with your accusations? I didn't come here against my will, where did you get this from? I really don't have to give you an explanation about my life in FL and why i lived here for as long as i had. If i HAD a choice, you bet FL wont be place i would go. So stop assuming and get on with your own life, i hope you are happy in FL. For me, it's time to move on.

i agree,i am 49 yrs old and i was born and raised in north fort myers, and raised both my kids there also, it is hot and humid and full of bugs, it is my home but it is not the best place by far to live...we moved up here to portland oregon 2 yrs ago and i just love it, no humidity, no mosquitos, you can go to the park and sit on the grass...i see mt.hood and mt.st.helens, this month we have averaged 76 degrees, down in the 50s to 60s at night, where you can sit outside without a six pack of off and 6-10 citrinella candles burning.., fall is one of the most beautiful things in the world to see, i never realized there was a change of seasons..everything stays the same in north fort myers year round...
i do miss the gulf and the beach and i also agree i hope you are happy there, but there are much better places to live, we always said fort myers was for the newly wed and the nearly dead and it still holds true....its for the young and stupid and the snowbirds who come there to die...
this is my home now and i love it.....come on up the weathers fantastic...

[HengyMama]

Originally Posted by hollys0822

I was just reading old posts about Florida and came across yours. All the things that you have described could be anywhere. Even here in New Hampshire. I think the teenage attitude is a global thing. I don't have a front lawn cuz of sand and I live in the mountains, real estate prices, taxes all that stuff has gone through the roof all the way to the moon.


We get hot in the summer, but not like you but in the winter, watch out. If you manage to actually get to work on the ice and snow without crashing, sliding into something or in one piece it is a good day although it probably took an extra hour or two cuz of the snow and other drivers. Won't get started on that. Wind chill that will freeze your skin in less than twenty minutes, better cover up. Kids go stircrazy, too cold outside to even play in the snow., on and on. But dont' forget the darkness, from about October to April, feels like living in a tomb.

Wanna trade problems? Guess it is all a matter of perspective. Sometimes if you smile at people and say hi, they will say hi and smile back. Sometimes not. But worth a try?

Hi and a smile

I still think there are areas of the country that are not like where we both live. Some areas are just friendlier and more neighborly. Sometimes that makes the living conditions tolerable.

[mistyd]

i moved from Tenesse to Florida, and talk about culture shock. Its amazing to me how people think of tennesse as country bumpkins. I moved to Florida kicking and screaming(metaphoricallly speaking) And have hated it since. I am massage therapist very much into the healing arts, and here that is looked upon as voodoo or devil worshiping. I cant count how many times my daughter was told she was going to hell because of her beliefs. The houses are overpriced and people live way beyond their means. There is no culture here, and it is defintitely a retirement state.. I am looking at moving myself, like some place in Arizona. It may be higher but at least the possibility of an open mind might exist

[backtofla]

you actually think fla is less open-minded than tn? uhhhhhh... no!

not trying to pick on you, but you also spelled tn wrong, but you lived there? are you sure this is a legit post? not accepted in fla but were accepted in tn? i'm confused.