Single Mom Relocating to South Florida w/questions (Miami, Tampa: real estate, for rent)

[wendalah]

I am a divorced mom of a young toddler - thinking about relocating to South Florida next year. I have family there and every time I visit I never want to come back to New York! Anyhoo, here is my question... I would eventually like to start dating again...however, loads of people say that it's not a great place for a single women at all and that the options are very slim. How do current South Florida residents feel about this opionion? I am an attractive, African-American professional woman - is this not the place for me? lol Please advise - many thanks!

[sparklestoo]

It is very expensive to live down here on one income. I too am a single parent of 2 and find it very difficult. I am a teacher and make an alright salary but the cost of living makes it tough to survive. Renting in a decent neighborhood will run about $900 for a 1 bedroom and 2 bedrooms go for $1000 plus. I have lived down here for about 5 years now. People down here are not friendly. I have yet to meet anyone that I could call a true friend. Think about it really hard if your moving down. Research it and of course make sure you have a job lined up. Where are you moving from?

[NEWTOSFLA]

Originally Posted by sparklestoo

It is very expensive to live down here on one income. I too am a single parent of 2 and find it very difficult. I am a teacher and make an alright salary but the cost of living makes it tough to survive. Renting in a decent neighborhood will run about $900 for a 1 bedroom and 2 bedrooms go for $1000 plus. I have lived down here for about 5 years now. People down here are not friendly. I have yet to meet anyone that I could call a true friend. Think about it really hard if your moving down. Research it and of course make sure you have a job lined up. Where are you moving from?

I agree with you SPARLESTOO, i'm a single parent of a 9month baby and i've been down here for about 3.5years, i have no family down here, and i have no real friends down here either, SOUTH FLORIDA is not a family friendly place unless you have a great job making really good money to send your child to private school and live in a very good neighborhood. I meet rude people everywhere in the US, so that's not my major problem, i feel like the people down here are not genuine or trustworthy(watch your back girl), alot of people down here do alot of drugs and are very seedy type of people

[NEWTOSFLA]

why would you want to meet a man down here,most of them are not faithful because there are way too many females down here who are willing to do anything to take your man and they are always half dress most of time and full of STD's(especially in Miami, trust me on this one(this is part of my career-i work in the medical field) it would be hard to find a "GOOD MAN" down here......And please try to find a good job down here before coming, because it wouldn't be right to live off your family. I wish you the best luck and hope that you will make the right decision

[LauderdaleTom]

The only thing good about moving is the low cost of homes because of all the Forclosures. If you or your family (bigger house to share) can find a real bargain then check on Property Taxes, Homestead and "Save Our Homes". Keep in mind that selling a house brings in less equity and people have been moving out since 2005.

[runswithscissors]

Originally Posted by wendalah

I am a divorced mom of a young toddler - thinking about relocating to South Florida next year. I have family there and every time I visit I never want to come back to New York! Anyhoo, here is my question... I would eventually like to start dating again...however, loads of people say that it's not a great place for a single women at all and that the options are very slim. How do current South Florida residents feel about this opionion? I am an attractive, African-American professional woman - is this not the place for me? lol Please advise - many thanks!

As a mom, IMO, if you are close to your family and they will be an important part of your child's life then move here. That is not replaceable. Especially adding a MAN into the equation makes everything dicey for the kid. So having family to help with the baby allows you to keep your social life separate from the baby's life. It's a major benefit, family. The MOST important thing IMO.

Just like anywhere else you'll want to be in areas that attract the same type of person you are otherwise it'll take alot of "luck" bumping into a good guy randomly, IMO.

Example, I haven't seen any potential "candidates" for you here, our businesses are limited. But in WPB or FLL, Jupiter, yes.

I also suggest you find a good church too, down here if you're that type. Even if you're not really a church goer it's still a good social structure to meet friends especially in the AA community, no? I'm not sure if it's that way in FLL or WPB like it is where I'm from, Philly, but all my Philly AA friends have a church connection. ALSO, my AA professional friends have formed mentoring groups in their companies and you may want to try and find a similar group of women here. OR start one!

I think there was another thread on this subject last week, do a search and see if you can find that woman she had the same questions etc.

[tracerall]

I just moved here from Tampa, and I have to say that its a different world here. I am a professional woman also who had to move because of my husbands job and I myself cannot find a job as all of them ask for bilingual only! what country is this again? I am absolutely insulted that I cannot find work here just because I dont speak Spanish! the people also drive crazy here and are not friendly, thats if you can find any that dont speak Spanish! I would move back to Tampa in a heartbeat if I could~!

[vvolin]

Originally Posted by tracerall

I just moved here from Tampa, and I have to say that its a different world here. I am a professional woman also who had to move because of my husbands job and I myself cannot find a job as all of them ask for bilingual only! what country is this again? I am absolutely insulted that I cannot find work here just because I dont speak Spanish! the people also drive crazy here and are not friendly, thats if you can find any that dont speak Spanish! I would move back to Tampa in a heartbeat if I could~!

I don't argue your feeling insulted because you can not find a job without a second language. It is a personal opinion and I respect it. Although coming from Europe I feel very differently about low employability of monolinguals.

But may I recommend that, while you get frustrated at the situation, you may also take a class in Spanish and attend Spanish speaking events to speed up the process of learning the language? You will find that it is not all that difficult or lengthy to reach a decent level. You may not like to "have" to do it, so think of it of an enrichment, which learning another language really is.

In six months you may still be without a job or you may be bilingual (and still without a job, lol!) I would give it a chance... Friendly,
VV

[MisterNY]

Originally Posted by wendalah

I am a divorced mom of a young toddler - thinking about relocating to South Florida next year. I have family there and every time I visit I never want to come back to New York! Anyhoo, here is my question... I would eventually like to start dating again...however, loads of people say that it's not a great place for a single women at all and that the options are very slim. How do current South Florida residents feel about this opionion? I am an attractive, African-American professional woman - is this not the place for me? lol Please advise - many thanks!

Let me try to answer your questions in reverse if I may...

Is this the place for you? Sitting behind my laptop, I cannot tell you if it is for you because I dont know what kind of person you are. What are your likes? desires? Where you want to live specifically? Goals? Long term and short term...

With that being said, if I were you I would focuse on a few things first. These are tips that should work everywhere.

1. Work. Make sure you source a job first. Make sure you can afford to live here once you know what the pay will be. If you are employed in NYC and doing good, by all means stay put until things improve or if you have a confirmed position lined up down here, take the chance if you see fit.

2. Since you have a baby/infant, family is important. Now, who are these relatives? Are we talking parents, siblings, cousins etc? Are they working, available, trustworthy etc? Can they help if you have an emergency, need to go out? etc.
If your parents are here for example, see if you can move in with them for a short time until you're settled. If it's possible.

3. Make sure you have a car. (This is not NYC, so you'll need one)

4. Real Estate: The next time you come, try contacting a realtor. See what you can afford for rent (or purchase). Check out the day cares etc. See what works for you.

5. Dating: While some here want to make South Florida and men look like a scene of "Nights of The Living Dead", the same principles will apply anywhere. You may have your fair share of losers, but that goes anywhere. Think about it; if it's as bad as some here say, I'd open my own dating service where I would import men from the "good states" to come populate South Florida...
Let's be real, if you are looking for Mr or Mrs Perfect...you wont find him or her anywhere. You just have to be realistic with your expectations, and date for a bit. Have responsible fun, and take your time. You've been married, have a child, are a professional. Don't rush. You've been there, done that.

I have plenty of women friends (black and latin mostly) that do complain about the dating scene down here...but wait....I also hear it from my women friends in NYC, Atlanta, Montreal...wait....even in California...
The point is; everyone is complaining where they are, so this is not unique to just South Florida.

I dont really like it down here, but I like to be fair about things. I hope you think it over, and come a few times before making the final move. See what works for you, and take it from there. Good Luck!

[MisterNY]

Originally Posted by tracerall

I just moved here from Tampa, and I have to say that its a different world here. I am a professional woman also who had to move because of my husbands job and I myself cannot find a job as all of them ask for bilingual only! what country is this again? I am absolutely insulted that I cannot find work here just because I dont speak Spanish! the people also drive crazy here and are not friendly, thats if you can find any that dont speak Spanish! I would move back to Tampa in a heartbeat if I could~!

I can understand your frustration, but vviolin has some sensible advice. Try learning it. I learn different languages for fun. I have been working on Japanese (and Kanji writing) for a few years now, and have been frustrated because of lack of people I can share or learn from, but I do it for the love of learning. It's all for fun.

I have been practicing Spanish for about 15 years now, and practice with colleagues from time to time. I did it because I wanted to, not because I was forced to. Vent, my dear. I know it can be frustrating.

I have been laxed about my Spanish as of late, because of my plans to move soon, but still have no regrets about learning it. You never lose anything by learning.