realistic reasons to relocate to Texas (real estate, homes, quality of life)
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I'm sorry your family is moving away - I'm facing similar opposition from my in-laws, but in my case, we're moving because I am being relocated by my company; my husband is currently unemployed (the company he worked for went out of business in December), yet I'm getting the guilt trip from inlaws for taking away their only grandchild; they think we're being selfish?
In your case, it sounds like your daughter I being impulsive, but she's an adult - she needs to make decisions based on what she thinks is best for her family, but she has to be aware of and live with the consequence of her actions.
I'll add that unions aren't in control of the trades in Texas, so a unionized carpenter from New England will have some adjusting to do. Still, I agree with the general tenor of the replies. Texas is a pretty nice place to try to make things work.
Yeah that sounds very spur of the moment. You can't take a relo lightly. I moved with a relo package and many of my expenses paid for, a job that was paying more than what I was making and STILL debated the move. We can say we're now happy here in Keller (or should I say Fort Worth so I don't anger the Keller-ites that say I'm not in Keller? haha) and enjoying life but I cannot imagine moving without a job. It's just too big a risk when you have a family to care for.
this decisions sounds like fleeing--not relocating--
if they both have good jobs and would lose money selling their condo--WHY are they making this move...there must be a reason they are not disclosing...
sounds like something has happened personally that makes living there less desireable than pulling up stakes and moving to unknown...really risky situation since neither one has job
that is not good idea
we know two people--friends of our daughter--who had problems in their marriages--one wound up getting divorce, moving to north of Austin, finding another teaching job (lucky), and starting relationship with guy who was several years younger than she was--which did not work out...
she had married her high school sweetheart (only guy she dated) right out of high school and while they were married for like 7 yrs--she felt like she was missing out on part of life--wanted more freedom--and there were financial difficulties because her husband was in construction and just could not make a go of it...so they divorced and she left...
the other couple--he cheated on her with someone at his job--they managed to work through that (supposedly) but for a while definitely wanted to move out of state to make a fresh start...
relocating did not work out because he could not get transfer--so he is back at the old job (and the person he had the affair with is still there)...verdict is still out on that one...
maybe not the best examples--but what I mean is that you take your problems with you when you move--they might be overridden or displaced in short term by more immediate issues but they don't just go away or miraculously dissolve because you are breathing the air of a different state...
and people are REALLY slow to change--so if the reason for moving is something personal you can pretty much count it will be there 100 days or 200 days later...no matter where you are living
Just want to thank everyone for the feedback on my Daughter & family moving to Texas. Now they have decided to wait till March 2010 d/t money reasons ! HAHA !! My son-in-law asked how it works to pay back when borrowing from his Union Annunity. Their answer was... if he borrows $15,000 (as example ), it would have to be paid off in five or so yrs w interest. Since they need a min of $25,000, & the repayment of 15,000 was going to kill them, that is what made them change the move date. So.... they may do alot more realisitic thinking rather than jump into a move.
Also, my daughter has told me her Bro in-law (a design engineer ) has been laid off over a month & because there are so many engineers looking for work, he still hasn't found another job yet. At least his wife is an accountant w TI... but we all know how that goes being the "newbie" ....and layofffs no matter where you live. Plus they have no children. And us parents know how cheap it is to raise a child! I'll just have to spend as much time w my Grandaughter as possible.. I don't work , but she is in daycare so I don't get to see her during the week. I live 50 mins. from them, so it's not like I can just pop in at the daycare woman's house whenever I feel like it. If I lived closer as my daughter will say to me, I could visit anytime while she is at work. I love all of them so very much & I know how my daughter is about family distance. I know she wants this move because that's what her husband wants. She is his wife, so she wants him to be happy. Very understandable....BUT, I'm mom & am having a very hard time dealing w this choice.
It will be nice to stay in contact w all who have commented as I am in limbo at this point. LOL !! But I don't want anyone to think I'm just bitching & complaining....It's emotional upset...
Thanks for any & all comments.
It is a very bold move. They must have a very positive outlook and great faith to be able to make such a change without any visible promises. That is good. I'm am sure all will be fine. Sometimes what looks a little scary for one person is exciting for someone else.
We moved from California two years ago not knowing a soul here. Away from family, but my hubby had to be centrally located for work. We chose the area because of all the other reasons that other people posted. Generally a better quality of life. Not oppressive taxes and a general change in lifestyle. Here I don't HAVE to work if I don't want to where in California, I HAD to work just to keep a roof over our heads.
My family looked and talked to me as if I was crazy because they couldn't fathom why anyone in the world would pick *holding nose - Texas*. Well I have to say that for me, it was a fantastic choice. I had lived in California all my life and it definitely gave me a new different perspective. For me, getting away from my family was a huge burden lifted off my shoulders. I didn't fully realize it until I was away from them that I realized that I could actually grow as an independent person, without all the family guilt.
My family still doesn't "get it", but I know it was the right choice for me, my hubby and two kids. I am a stay at home mom, we have a nicer home than I could even think about having in California, I'm not taxed up the wazoo, the Texas government meets once every two years for six months and last year my taxes actually went down a little bit.
I am glad to hear they have reconsidered the move. Moving out of state without a job lined up is a risk even in the best economy, let alone one like we're facing now. I lived in Ft Worth for 8 years and often think of moving back; we tried to do it last year but it wasn't the right time for many reasons. I still have many friends in D/FW and they say that the job market is not what it once was. When we moved there in the 90s you could find a job quickly - we moved with a ridiculously small amount of money and family members to stay with and were on our feet within 6 weeks. From what I understand you couldn't do that even there today. TX in general has a better job market than much of the country but that's a relative measure - it's still tough to find work for many people and in many industries. I know people even in DFW with good work histories and skills who have been out of work for several months. Just not a wise move to make by choice, especially with kids, and I'm glad they've realized that.
You never know what can happen in a year. At this time last year I was desperate to get out of Michigan, where my husband and I DON'T have good jobs even now, and thought moving back to Texas was a reason for hope. Things have really changed in the past year and i have come to appreciate the value of being where my roots are. Maybe it will be the same for your daughter
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