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Old 12-07-2015, 07:27 PM
 
3,153 posts, read 2,848,160 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey View Post
Grew up competing, spending maxxing out credit to give relatives nice gifts

At this point I have a nice house, friends, animals and a full life. It is no longer necessary to spend 10-20k on Christmas junk that gets tossed in the garage 2 weeks later.

I wonder if anyone else has similar thoughts? I now travel with family to see other countries, it is much more fulfilling.
Other than my child and nieces and nephews, I would very much like to do away with adult gift-giving. It's a waste of money AND time (it takes me forever to find something for everyone), and most of the time they probably don't love it anyway. I know I almost never use anything they give me, unless it's cash. Unfortunately, the only person on board is my frugal husband - rest of the family still expects gifts.
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Old 12-08-2015, 10:28 AM
 
Location: North Idaho
20,999 posts, read 25,750,723 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mnseca View Post
........ - rest of the family still expects gifts.
So what? Just because they expect gifts, that doesn't become a federal law that you must meet their expectations.

Start about 6 months before Christmas and inform them that you will not be buying gifts and that you do not expect to receive gifts. Remind them again about 30 days before Christmas and then do not give any gifts.

Don't argue with them about it. Tell them it is a fact. You no longer buy gifts and you do not expect to receive gifts. If they have a problem with it, it is their problem. Do not make it into your problem.
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Old 12-08-2015, 03:11 PM
 
Location: Great State of Texas
86,093 posts, read 69,893,919 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey View Post
Grew up competing, spending maxxing out credit to give relatives nice gifts

At this point I have a nice house, friends, animals and a full life. It is no longer necessary to spend 10-20k on Christmas junk that gets tossed in the garage 2 weeks later.

I wonder if anyone else has similar thoughts? I now travel with family to see other countries, it is much more fulfilling.
Holy moly..I never spent anywhere near that amount when I was gift giving to family.
Maybe a few hundred at best.

Once the kids grew up it just turned into annual cards sent to everyone.

I just exchange gifts with my son, brother and sister and we limit ourselves to $50 each.
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Old 12-09-2015, 12:30 PM
 
Location: Western Colorado
10,521 posts, read 11,628,203 times
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I stopped buying people crap years ago. I make homemade cookies, candy, bread, salsa. And I would rather receive that instead of some...well if someone wanted to give me a new Mustang GT convertible I wouldn't turn it down.
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Old 12-09-2015, 02:00 PM
 
2,056 posts, read 2,264,886 times
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The wife buys her sons and a couple of friends gifts every year, but we essentially ignore Christmas and Thanksgiving. Christmas is really for small children.

One year we went to Sonic for our Thanksgiving dinner! Well, it was really because it was freezing cold in NM, the buses weren't running, and there was nothing else open, but still. I dislike all of these phony consumer driven holidays. One day you and I won't be here, so it's better to celebrate each moment because it might just be our last one.
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Old 12-09-2015, 08:07 PM
 
Location: SW Florida
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I am so fed up with the extreme materialistic chaos! I personally would be perfectly fine not giving or getting ANYTHING and love Christmas just as much, if not more.

Unfortunately my husband isn't on board. He wants us to each buy gifts for each other, which is ok but a small budget at least($25 each). He doesn't think it's possible. I'm fine with more homemade, practical, unique, cookies, candies type gifts. The other issue is family in laws.. His sister insists we all buy for everyone, not a huge family but a lot of people. I have made it a mission to only spend $5 per person for last 2 years and each year has been a success including this one. We mostly buy at garage sales, flea markets, and shop for deals. Once we used a coupon to kohls, $10 off a $10 purchase which ended up getting us a free gift. We only buy it if it looks new(in a box still) Would I rather him tell her, no we're not buying or asking for gifts, absolutely. I'd much rather just get together and have a nice meal, talk ect. We discuss this every year.. I think every year I am getting more persistent about it.

In closing, there is much better ways to put money towards then Christmas gifts.. Especially since many gifts are probably not even wanted. Also, I really love Christmas, it's my favorite holiday and very much enjoy it, I could just really do without the pressures of gifting.
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Old 12-09-2015, 08:09 PM
 
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Wow that's a lot of money spending for Xmas. No wonder you are sick of it. I would scale it down.
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Old 12-09-2015, 08:32 PM
 
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Many people I have known overdid it with the spending and as for myself there's no way I would have come close to spending that amount of money even if I had it. Have known family's who drew names and set a limit and others where gifts had to be made. As for me I have totally set a limit and will continue to do so. Christmas ceases to be enjoyable when going into debt.
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Old 12-10-2015, 01:17 PM
 
Location: In a vehicle.
4,547 posts, read 2,772,025 times
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Sister said "No gifts this year" Got no issues with that, in fact this year would have been the last anyway.

Now going to go to a SA (Salvation Army) tree and select the tags and buy for them instead.

Most of the time it's simple basic stuff. Socks, shoes, coat and such...No frills.


I did that at another mall years ago, then the Nintendo came out, kids wanting that?? Heck I wouldn't even give it to my sisters kids, like I would spend $300 on THAT?? (Bought it later (Used) for $89...)

But now it's what do they NEED not "Want"....there's always a difference.
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Old 12-11-2015, 08:46 AM
 
Location: Boise, ID
8,011 posts, read 22,511,601 times
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We give to a family in need. Someone who can't afford rent for the month, let alone any kind of Christmas celebration, usually not even a nice meal.


For our family, we buy a stack of scratch tickets, expecting to lose, have fun scratching them off, and then go out to dinner on whatever we won. Sometimes that is one time out. Sometimes we get lucky and it pays for 2. Other than that, it is a meal and family time. Very low stress.


And I had the same type of upbringing as the OP. Extravagant gifts were not at all unusual. Several times as a child I received gifts that cost over $2000 for a single item. So I've been there too. It took me a while to talk the family into not exchanging gifts anymore, but we got there eventually. I used to hate December because I hate shopping, now I have no issue with it, and just look forward to the time with family.
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