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Old 02-17-2016, 05:38 PM
 
Location: Gig Harbor, WA
305 posts, read 120,542 times
Reputation: 280

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I couldn't do that, no judgement though.

I've been told I'm stupidly stubborn and independent, not always a good thing. The minute I got a good enough paying job I moved out. It was the worst apartment in the worst area and most of my friends and family legitimately feared for my safety - but that was one of the happiest moments of my life.

I made some mistakes after getting married too fast and too young, so my husband and I lived with his parent's for two years while we saved up a down payment. That was in the middle of the recession and there were a lot of people doing much the same, but for me it still felt stifling. I was so desperate for a place of my own.

We bought our place back in 2012 at the bottom of the market, got a wonderful deal on a tiny little place and I love it. For most people it's probably not enough, but for our little family it's a dream come true.
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Old 02-18-2016, 07:38 PM
 
Location: Colorado Springs
3,797 posts, read 1,469,232 times
Reputation: 2906
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabbythecat View Post
It really seems strange. Don't you want your own home? Don't you want to have a place that you can decorate as you want, where you can have friends over when you want, without your parents being in the way?

And - don't your parents want their home to themselves? Maybe they would like it if you would pay rent - have you ever offered to pay rent?

Do you help with household chores, or do they do it all for you?

What happens if you get married? Would you expect your new spouse to move in with you and your parents?

This seems strange, as though you are not willing to grow up and accept adult responsibilities, financially and for maintaining a roof over your head.

In other countries, they may live this way. But this is America, not other countries.
For the majority of human history and in most of the world to this day families live together. Why is there this ridiculous stigma about living with family?
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Old 02-22-2016, 03:32 PM
 
12,404 posts, read 9,206,608 times
Reputation: 8863
Quote:
Originally Posted by BornintheSprings View Post
For the majority of human history and in most of the world to this day families live together. Why is there this ridiculous stigma about living with family?
And how much were the grown kids expected to contribute?
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Old 02-22-2016, 04:21 PM
 
Location: Colorado Springs
3,797 posts, read 1,469,232 times
Reputation: 2906
Quote:
Originally Posted by ncole1 View Post
And how much were the grown kids expected to contribute?
Who said anything about not contributing that of course should happen. However even if you do that you are still considered lower on social status if you live with your family its disgusting.
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Old 02-23-2016, 07:34 AM
 
39 posts, read 20,482 times
Reputation: 47
What if family lives with you, and you are the homeowner?
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Old 02-23-2016, 05:20 PM
 
165 posts, read 120,860 times
Reputation: 842
I am the homeowner and I share my home with my adult daughter, her husband, and two school age children. We split all the expenses and upkeep of the home. It helps all of us.

We all have more money to save and spend. The children enjoy extra attention. The parents can get that special alone time without kids. And I get flexibility to do what I want to when I want to....and being able to afford it. Works for all of us.

I am a widow and retired. Both my daughter and her husband are employed. My son in law travels a lot. We live in a high cost of living area.
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Old 02-23-2016, 08:33 PM
 
1,777 posts, read 1,283,903 times
Reputation: 2527
Quote:
Originally Posted by BATCAT View Post
In my experience, throughout much of Latin America it's fairly common for unmarried adults to live with their parents quite a ways into adulthood.

So the answer is, yes, millions of people are doing so.
This is very popular in many Asian countries/communities as well. The stigma associated with being a certain age and still living at home seems to be a very American thing.
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Old 02-23-2016, 08:36 PM
 
1,777 posts, read 1,283,903 times
Reputation: 2527
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabbythecat View Post
It really seems strange. Don't you want your own home? Don't you want to have a place that you can decorate as you want, where you can have friends over when you want, without your parents being in the way?

And - don't your parents want their home to themselves? Maybe they would like it if you would pay rent - have you ever offered to pay rent?

Do you help with household chores, or do they do it all for you?

What happens if you get married? Would you expect your new spouse to move in with you and your parents?

This seems strange, as though you are not willing to grow up and accept adult responsibilities, financially and for maintaining a roof over your head.

In other countries, they may live this way. But this is America, not other countries.
But America is a melting pot, made up of people from many other countries, many of whom bring their traditions and values with them here. Whether it's right or wrong is purely subjective. But living at home as an older person is not necessarily frowned upon by every group of people. For some the arrangement works great; for others, not so much. It's basically just a case-by-case set-up.
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Old 02-23-2016, 08:43 PM
 
1,777 posts, read 1,283,903 times
Reputation: 2527
Quote:
Originally Posted by Vision67 View Post
If that's OK with them and you why not?

I have a huge paid off house (4700 square feet) and if one of my kids wanted to move into the unoccupied finished lower level apartment I'd love to have them back.

Save the rent. Live life.
Can I have it? I'd pay rent, of course…..LOL

I have family all over Colorado, from Denver to Trinidad, and I have always wanted to try living in Colorado. I live in Southern California, and I hate the rat race here and the congestion.

But back to the topic: to each his/her own. An older adult still living at home might be weird, or it might be ok, or it might be a normal thing. People are all different. Customs and values are different, as are personal situations. The reasons why a 30 or 40+ year old person might still be living at home could be numerous. If it works for the parties involved, then that's all that matters.
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Old 02-23-2016, 09:14 PM
 
1,777 posts, read 1,283,903 times
Reputation: 2527
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gabbythecat View Post
What happens when your parents are gone? What will you do then?
I'm sure he will get some kind of inheritance and probably the house. Does this guy need tough love, too, considering he has a disability?
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