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Old 10-22-2013, 09:22 PM
 
4,580 posts, read 6,143,617 times
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Look in your mother's high school yearbook and see if any guy is mentioned. Find out who her best friend was and ask them. Something to consider is she has a reason for not telling you. Search if you must but you may not like what you find.

 
Old 10-23-2013, 03:02 AM
 
Location: Northampton, Mass.
697 posts, read 856,949 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Caltovegas View Post
Look in your mother's high school yearbook and see if any guy is mentioned. Find out who her best friend was and ask them. Something to consider is she has a reason for not telling you. Search if you must but you may not like what you find.
Very true. The fact the mother is so unwilling to tell probably means she knows the identity of the father and for whatever reason is not willing to disclose that to her own child...DNA tests can even indicate not just clues but things like incest--which is why if you wish to dig deep into the mother's past or your own for that matter, be prepared for anything...such situations often will have surprises and they are not always pleasant ones. But if you really want the truth and are willing to accept it for what it is, then by all means.
The schools she attended certainly are a good start, not to mention police and court files, well as newspapers for the time and place going a few years in either direction from the date of birth. Essentially you'd be wanting to do an investigation akin to what a Private Investigator would do on someone, but of their lives and events of 30 years prior. Since many people are probably still alive it is worth it and should not be held off much longer if they really wish to find the truth, and are prepared emotionally.
 
Old 06-11-2014, 09:41 AM
 
1 posts, read 707 times
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My situation is also similar. My mother married when she was a couple months pregnant and moved across the country. I doubt very strongly that my birth father even knows she was pregnant. All I know is "Don" and I only know that because when they argued that name came up every time until I asked about it. My parents would never talk about how they met and I couldn't get any info from them. Turns out my sister did get some info that confirmed my suspicion of my parentage but no details, no name, nothing but that I am not my dad's bio daughter. I am now in my 60's so the chance of him being alive are less but I'd just like to know about him and find out if I have family somewhere.
 
Old 06-11-2014, 07:12 PM
 
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Are your parents still living? Was your stepfather in the service?or just grew up where your mom did?

The high school yearbook suggestion seems really appropriate here - you even have a first name. Seems like it was someone they both knew.
 
Old 08-16-2014, 03:57 AM
 
1 posts, read 614 times
Reputation: 10
I'm having the same issue. I'm trying to find info on my boyfriend's father. He never met him and the only thing he knows is his name and where he was from. His mom refuses to tell him anything. She was only 15 when she had him. I keep doing searches, but am coming out empty handed every time. It's like the guy never existed! I'm thinking that maybe the name he has is maybe his middle name. I keep hitting dead ends. He really wants to know more about him, but I can't find anything. The only other thing we know is that he had other children with other girls at the same time my boyfriend was born and that he died when my bf was around 10 years old.
 
Old 08-16-2014, 10:15 AM
 
Location: 2016 Clown Car...fka: Wisconsin
738 posts, read 770,446 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Marcella294 View Post
I'm having the same issue. I'm trying to find info on my boyfriend's father. He never met him and the only thing he knows is his name and where he was from. His mom refuses to tell him anything. She was only 15 when she had him. I keep doing searches, but am coming out empty handed every time. It's like the guy never existed! I'm thinking that maybe the name he has is maybe his middle name. I keep hitting dead ends. He really wants to know more about him, but I can't find anything. The only other thing we know is that he had other children with other girls at the same time my boyfriend was born and that he died when my bf was around 10 years old.
If the person has died, especially if that death occurred in the last 20 years, a simple check of the SSDI would reveal some pertinent information about him. If you have doubts about the name, but know his approximate year of birth and approximate year and where he may have died, that information could be cross-checked with other people in the SSDI database in the same location. Some SSDI records on Ancestry.com do not give specific locations of death, but many do which would allow you to write off for a copy of the death certificate. DCs can be very useful in reconstructing a person's family history.

I'm not saying this will answer all of your BF's questions, but it may help move him closer to the answers he seeks.

RVcook

Edited to add: I sent you a DM.
 
Old 08-16-2014, 01:46 PM
 
Location: too far from the sea
17,994 posts, read 17,150,498 times
Reputation: 30133
This is an old thread and I am closing it. If you are looking for a particular person who could still be living, you will have better luck in the People Search Forum. You should start a new thread there.
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