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Old 07-25-2013, 12:23 AM
 
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We have one of those stories. A 4th GGM is the only wife of that GGF I know, and out of five children, one daughter's ancestors are insisting she was the daughter of an Indian Princess who married our 4th GGF.

I asked my aunt, she thinks they are mistaken, in fact, knows nothing of it, but did tell a story about my grandmother parting her thick long hair down the center, tying it of into braids, and putting a blanket on for a picture. With her thick thick dark hair in braids and the blanket she looked like a squaw, and her mother got VERY upset when she saw the picture. Think right around 1917... and pictures weren't very common then.

So it stays in the possible family lore file. Lots of thick dark straight hair doesn't mean Indian Princess. And I might even be more on board if it was just an Shawnee woman.
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Old 07-25-2013, 11:44 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hallouise View Post
Yes, I've had very similar experiences with a family member.

...But it is embarrassing when I think of how many friends over the years I repeated those "we're related to such and such" stories to. They were all lies (I mean not just passed down and distorted, but deliberately made up with a certain purpose in mind). But, you know, reading these stories helps. It seems to be much more common than I realized.
Thanks, I was thinking the same thing! I'm relieved that it's not just my family that has all this fake BS in its history.


I am also embarrassed by the stories that I've repeated since childhood--about the poor German immigrants who died in the flu pandemic, and about my supposed ancestor who signed the Declaration of Independence and then freed his slave, who was portrayed as the black man pictured in the boat with Washington crossing the Delaware.

The guy who signed the Declaration of Independence was real: General William Whipple. The freed slave who fought beside Washington was real: Prince Whipple. But they aren't related to my Whipples.

It ticks me off because I don't care about having any famous ancestors, or ancestors with spicy stories. to me, the truth and who they really were is so much more interesting. I just wish my Mom and her parents thought like that instead of creating and perpetuating this mythology.
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Old 07-25-2013, 10:38 PM
 
Location: San Marcos, TX
2,569 posts, read 7,743,642 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hallouise View Post
I'm not mad, per se (just another thing on a huge pile of dysfunction from this family member). But it is embarrassing when I think of how many friends over the years I repeated those "we're related to such and such" stories to. They were all lies (I mean not just passed down and distorted, but deliberately made up with a certain purpose in mind). But, you know, reading these stories helps. It seems to be much more common than I realized. The story about the mother-in-law who insisted on Spanish lineage, when the family had been in Mexico for generations, is wild!
I shared that about my MIL, and I have seen it fairly frequently. I think there was a lot of prejudice against people of Mexican descent where they were living (Iowa) and I even saw some of this attitude in my wife, who didn't realize she was of Mexican descent and had grown up where that would be a "bad thing". Like the story of my friend who was told she was Italian, not Mexican. It's sad.

Quote:
Originally Posted by TracySam View Post
I am also embarrassed by the stories that I've repeated since childhood--about the poor German immigrants who died in the flu pandemic, and about my supposed ancestor who signed the Declaration of Independence and then freed his slave, who was portrayed as the black man pictured in the boat with Washington crossing the Delaware.
I wanted to tell y'all both a story about stories we pass on to others. I had a friend in elementary school, we were "best friends" from 2nd grade through 5th grade and I spent a LOT of time at her house. I was always kind of wowed by her family and house, all very different from mine (her parents were married, she lived in a very big "fancy" house --from my POV-- and had a fancy piano, and private lessons, and a riding lawnmower, lol!).... anyway I remember her telling me that she was related to Eli Whitney, inventor of the cotton gin, and for some reason this stuck with me, probably just because of my interest in history. I remember telling my mother about it, when I was just a kid. I guess I was a weird kid that this would "impress" me but whatever.

We moved away and I did not continue that friendship, due to distance.

Decades later (I am 42) we re-connect on Facebook and we were just chatting about stuff we remembered from our time together as kids and I mention the Eli Whitney thing... and she laughs and laughs but says it is NOT true and she had no idea where she got that idea as a kid. Obviously it was something someone said though, and something she grew up believing at least for part of her life. So it happens to everyone I think, or most of us anyway!
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Old 07-28-2013, 12:20 PM
bjh
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sally_Sparrow View Post
There's a crazy tone of "mother worship" overall, in society. As if, by virtue of giving birth, mothers can never ever be wrong and you can't say anything about anything they do. I hate this, and I am a mother to three children!

...
I know what you mean. That extends a bit to both parents, but you're right it is more so about mothers. Don't get me wrong it's great when people are good to their kids, but this ignores the fact that some children are abused and neglected by either or both parents.

Parents are people who had sex that happened to result in conception and carry through to delivery. We don't normally applaud people just for having sex. It's the care of a child after they're born that matters. Kudos to anyone who truly and kindly parents a child, be they the birth parents or not. It's the care that matters, not the fertility.
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Old 07-28-2013, 12:22 PM
bjh
 
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Originally Posted by Tallysmom View Post
Been there, Tracy.... my father in law. Now -- in his defense, his father died when he and his brother were young, and I think the tall tales told might have been stories from his mother to keep dear father alive in the boys memories..

He insisted his grandfather Alex came over with his wife Hannah and came through Ellis Island.

Nope -- when I got to researching (after Pop's death) I found that his grandfather was here during he Ellis Island years. Born in Ohio. And Hannah? Part of pre-revolutionary war line.

The part about being related to President McKinley was true -- he was a first cousin a few removed.

BUT -- there was a kernel of truth. An Alex WAS the first over here. In 1803, he was here and his wife Mary gave birth to a son David in Bedford County PA.

When I get things all nice and cleared up in my tree, I'll start on Hubby's tree again to find the kissing cousins link -- I just have a hunch we're very distantly related.....
If you both do a DNA test, you can know in no uncertain terms.
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Old 07-28-2013, 12:23 PM
bjh
 
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Originally Posted by faeryedark View Post
My dad's German family came over around 1720. We still ate Sauerkraut etc. Some families hold onto things longer, nothing wrong with that :-)
Our German is a small percentage. I really like sauerkraut though.
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Old 07-28-2013, 02:16 PM
 
Location: near bears but at least no snakes
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I take it all with a grain of salt. I've found that those stories usually have a grain of truth, a clue, but not to believe them 100%. Mine were only stories though. I would be upset if someone actually gave me false names and dates--and really upset if they did "genealogy" in written form and just made it up.
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Old 07-28-2013, 02:23 PM
 
Location: near bears but at least no snakes
26,654 posts, read 28,682,916 times
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On my maternal side we supposedly founded a town in Rhode Island and are related to a certain family. My mother told me that Uncle xxxxxx always liked to spin yarns so I still don't believe it although research is certainly pointing in that direction.

On my paternal side, it was more omission than anything. Do not ask.
Me, being me, I asked. So my aunt called up the relatives in England and asked. I got the canned version. Years later, doing family history, that canned version didn't make sense. I remembered my grandfather and he would not have left England for the reason they gave. It had to be something worse. It was, and it was very very sad.
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Old 07-28-2013, 07:40 PM
 
Location: Georgia, USA
37,102 posts, read 41,267,704 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bjh View Post
If you both do a DNA test, you can know in no uncertain terms.
That depends on how distant the common ancestor is. It would be possible to be related but not share any of the DNA tested with current methods.
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Old 07-31-2013, 12:22 AM
bjh
 
60,096 posts, read 30,391,518 times
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Originally Posted by suzy_q2010 View Post
That depends on how distant the common ancestor is. It would be possible to be related but not share any of the DNA tested with current methods.
That goes without saying ( or should ) since all humans are related. The poster said "kissing cousins" which implies a recent kinship.
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