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Old 10-20-2010, 08:10 AM
 
15 posts, read 32,848 times
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Hello all,
I have taken a job in South Dakota. My husband has some things to wrap up here in Florida before he is able to make it out there. My parents think this is a horrible idea, and it shouldn't happen. I am planning on leaving at the end of November and he will be up there February 1 at the latest.
Has anyone else ever done this?
Any advice also appreciated. Thank you
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Old 10-20-2010, 09:37 AM
 
Location: The D-M-V area
13,694 posts, read 15,632,430 times
Reputation: 9519
What's the big deal?

So you're living separate for a few months.

Think of the men & women in the military separated from their wives/husbands for over a year on the other side of the planet.

Tell them to stay out of your business.
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Old 10-20-2010, 09:42 AM
 
Location: Las Flores, Orange County, CA
26,346 posts, read 82,977,020 times
Reputation: 17509
Quote:
Originally Posted by GISgirl82 View Post

I am planning on leaving at the end of November and he will be up there February 1 at the latest.
So, no husband for you for two months. Hmmm. Where in South Dakota will you be?



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Old 10-20-2010, 09:52 AM
 
1,309 posts, read 3,002,563 times
Reputation: 614
that is a bitter sweet song for me in someareas..
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Old 10-20-2010, 09:54 AM
 
Location: SoCal, Idaho
3,162 posts, read 8,628,623 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by GISgirl82 View Post
My parents think this is a horrible idea, and it shouldn't happen.
Quote:
Originally Posted by LuckyGem View Post
Tell them to stay out of your business.
x2 and couldn't agree more.

What do YOU think? Do YOU think its a horrible idea?
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Old 10-20-2010, 10:51 AM
 
Location: The Hall of Justice
25,906 posts, read 36,315,569 times
Reputation: 42508
Quote:
Originally Posted by GISgirl82 View Post
Hello all,
I have taken a job in South Dakota. My husband has some things to wrap up here in Florida before he is able to make it out there. My parents think this is a horrible idea, and it shouldn't happen. I am planning on leaving at the end of November and he will be up there February 1 at the latest.
Has anyone else ever done this?
Any advice also appreciated. Thank you
Yep, we did that. My husband was offered a promotion that moved us from California to Illinois. They wanted him to start in the beginning of May, and the kids were in school through late June. He drove one of the cars out there and rented a room for three months. I packed up the house and flew out in June to pick out our new home, and the loan closed at the end of July. My husband flew back to California about a week before that (I was already back with the kids, of course). The moving truck arrived, we packed it up, and then we drove the other car to Illinois.

Couples live apart when they have to. A few months is not the end of the world and will be gone before you know it.
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Old 10-20-2010, 11:36 AM
 
5,702 posts, read 16,180,463 times
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Yes we did this. Hubby took a job out of state and I stayed behind so my son could finish out the school year and for me to pack up our home. We were apart for 3 months. We did have a visit here and there but I found the visits to be pretty stressful. My son would cry on the way home and I think it actually made it worse by having the small visits.

I did pretty well with it but my husband had a harder time. He admitted he did not realize just how much I did for him until he was completely on his own again. Quite a shock to him since we have been together for 20 yrs! In this economy sometimes families have to live apart for a little while for the over all good. Some people do not understand this, you and hubby will be fine!
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Old 10-20-2010, 11:52 AM
 
Location: Lead/Deadwood, SD
948 posts, read 2,355,738 times
Reputation: 855
I think it shows a level of strength, commitment, and trust when a couple is willing to sacrifice being apart while working towards a goal that will bring them back together. If your parents think it is a horrible idea and don't have any reason other than unsubstantiated fear then they are just doing what parents do - worry about their kids. I'm sure you and your husband have worked out the pros and cons while the parents are just looking at the cons.
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Old 10-20-2010, 12:02 PM
 
4,247 posts, read 10,551,076 times
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I've done it and it worked. Moved 800 miles away but still the same state lol (new job she stayed until the house sold and quit her job) and the wife joined me 6 months later. But we seen each other atleast once a month. Life is about sacrfices and in the grand scheme of things is a really short time. And you'll both like the time apart.

Last edited by piyf; 10-20-2010 at 12:10 PM..
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Old 10-20-2010, 01:21 PM
 
92 posts, read 195,951 times
Reputation: 129
I have done this 9 times so far, three times with kids. DH's new jobs always required an earlier start date than what I could possibly deal with (getting house for sale, finding us a place to live, kids in school, etc). All told, we've been apart a total of about 7 or 8 months for all the moves.

No, it's not fun, but you do what you have to do. Plus, a couple of months is no big deal, unless your relationship is on rocky ground or there are trust issues. Also, it's not like you won't see each other; you'll have some house or apartment hunting to do, and he'll want to be checking out the area before he gets there.

Just know that you're not alone and you'll get through it. In the grand scheme of things, two months is not long at all. And, your parents need to stay out; they are putting unnecessary stress on your shoulders right now. BTW, do they live in FL with you now? Anyway, best of luck with your new job and upcoming move!
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