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I regretted my first move out of college. I made a very low wage, lived in a high cost of living area, lived in a town with some of the lowest forms of life anywhere I've seen, and was also around the most backward people I've ever seen. I left after a year. While it ended up being a terrible decision, it made me appreciate where I lived after that. You may get these hard moves, but had I not done the first one, not only would I not appreciate what I have now. I also hate to think about what I would be doing now if I was still living where I am now. Take the chance!
I did really regret my move to DE for college. Although I was so excited to get there, once I did, I had crippling social anxiety, depression, and almost dropped out of school. I did finish though and was more than happy to get back to DC.
But things have changed quite a bit for me (that was over 10 years ago hard to believe!), in terms of my social personality and my mental state so I feel it could be a lot better this time around.
Thanks to everyone else for your insight as well.
I am definitely looking at jobs before I go. The dilemma I am having though is... I can't move until June at the earliest. Most people who are hiring now, don't want to wait until a few months down the road. I need to get a place to live secured before I can accept a job. It's harder to find a place in this city because I have a dog.
So, do I secure a place if the right one comes along that allows pets even if I don't have a job?
Or what If I were able to get a job then couldn't find a place that allowed pets? I also can't drop everything to go up there and look at a place once it is advertised. I am actually going up there at mid-end April to hopefully look at places.
But, that's where I am sort of stuck right now.
And yes I know the whole "wherever you go, there you are" sort of thing, and have thought a lot about it... whether I am just doing this to get away from something here, or really truly experience something else.
And the truth is, I want to become more involved in my art and photography and my dream is to possibly open an art gallery one day. That would basically be impossible in DC. Yes, DC will always be here and I can always come back after a year if nothing goes right.
I really regret moving. Our family had a small house in an area which was ideal. The expense of living was getting ridiculous. We moved to a much larger house, lower taxes and better schools. I thought it would be perfect, great neighborhood and area.
Sadly it isn't the same. I was depressed for months. I figured after a couple of years I would feel settled. Now four years later I am not. I miss my friends and my community. Sometimes you are lucky and can rebuild that, sometimes you can't. I haven't had any luck finding a close group of friends. It truly isn't the same.
However on the plus side, we aren't living paycheck to paycheck, the area we live in is much better for the kids and we are near family. I don't know if I would do it over again, but glad we did.
Sort of, but I wasn't in the right state of mind. I was grieving over my father's death when I left Chicago for Montana. It's a beautiful state, but I can't handle small town living. There's just not enough to do. When I was finished grieving for his death, and the fog lifted, I realized Montana was definitely not for me. And I couldn't believe I was there, having put all dreams and plans on hold to do something so crazy as move to a small town in Montana. At the same time, it gave me a chance to heal and cope with what I was going through. Ultimately I like to think it was a good place to take a much needed break to face the questions of mortality that I was facing.
I don't think anyone would regret a move if they were prepared and informed before they made the jump.
I wouldn't make any move though without a job lined up, even if I was young and single. I also don't think it would be wise to make a move without visiting the potential town or city and getting an idea of the neighborhoods you might want to move to.
If you push past your fears you may just love where you end up. And being single you won't have much of a problem moving back if it isn't right for you.
Not ever giving it a try. Now that you will regret!
Thanks, I am too afraid of change and I want to move to Charlotte or Atlanta.....I do agree with you 100%.......not giving it a try will be my biggest regret....
you are not going to find a job while living out of state. if you have a decent amount of savings, do some research on the job market in the area you're moving to beforehand, and aren't afraid to wait tables or something if it comes down to it (even better if you have experience in a crap, high-turnover job like that) then go for it.
If I had to quantify the most regretted move of people that I know, I would have to say it's their decision to move to Nevada, with the exception of the very few who live on the Nevada shore of Lake Tahoe. These are primarily Westerners.
OTOH, the move that most Westerners (not) surprisingly make very well is the move to the Southeast.
Sort of, but I wasn't in the right state of mind. I was grieving over my father's death when I left Chicago for Montana. It's a beautiful state, but I can't handle small town living. There's just not enough to do. When I was finished grieving for his death, and the fog lifted, I realized Montana was definitely not for me. And I couldn't believe I was there, having put all dreams and plans on hold to do something so crazy as move to a small town in Montana. At the same time, it gave me a chance to heal and cope with what I was going through. Ultimately I like to think it was a good place to take a much needed break to face the questions of mortality that I was facing.
I don't think it is ever wise to make a decision as life changing as moving, or any big decision for that matter, for at least a year after the loss of a loved one. I am sure, like most who are grieving, you really wanted to escape from the hurt you were feeling. Luckily, you are able to see the good in it, as well as the lesson and I don't think you could possible regret that.
Every move I made I have regrets from time to time. No place no living situation is perfect and none is entireely horrid (at least in my experience). Even if I love the new place, I miss things about the old place. You regret the move when you are missing the things you left behind, but rejoice in the move when you are enjoying the things that are better in the new place. There is always somethig better. Cleaner air, prettier flowers, more to do, less traffic, better shopping and dining, friedlier people, less shallowness, prettier girls, neat geographical fetures, better hiking, better canoeing, better bike riding, better driving, better beaches, nearby fa mily members. There are always at least a few things that are an improvement and at least a few things that are worse. For me, most places are pretty much a push.
Sometme I regret a move out of selfishness. Our most recent move was good for our kids, my extended family, my wife, it was even good for our dog. But for me persoanlly it was not that great and for my career it was bad. So while I regret that I personally liked the old place I still like somethings about the new place better and it is clearly better for everyone else, so it was a good move.
I think you should go for it. I moved cross country from VA to CO. I just needed a change and I was sick of living in a small town. I had been wondering all my life what it would be like to live somewhere else and I never had the guts to do it. It isn't perfect here in the new place. Even though I knew rationally things wouldn't be perfect in the new place I still felt and sometimes still do feel disappointed when I don't feel like I'm as happy here as I expected to be.
BUT I'd rather make a mistake than wonder what if. If you stay in the same place when your heart is telling you to move, then you will always always wonder what if you had moved. Wonder if you would have been happier and what it would have been like. If you move and you hate it and realize DC is the place for you, then you can move back. Nothing is permanent. Good luck!
Moved frmo California to the SC for family, then family left to go back to CA.
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