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Old 12-27-2012, 05:17 PM
154 posts, read 319,334 times
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Please tell me how long it takes to get over the shock of moving from one state to another....We finally moved to FL and although we know itis the right thing to do we aren't feeling "at home" yet. I know we have only been here for about 4 days. I have to go work in about another 4 days, totally new people and I knew all of this before I left but how can I get thru this terrible period without going insane? Has anyone else ever been thru this ? If you have please give me a few tips...Thank you all.
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Old 12-27-2012, 08:58 PM
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I think it depends on the person. I have moved a couple of times, although never for a job transfer. We started 100% cold turkey, with not even a job! My husband and I have never made our social connections through employment, although some people are able to do that. The best friends I have made have been through getting to know people through groups at church. Not the church service, but smaller groups of people .Nowdays, in larger communities, they have something called "Meetups" which are announced on the internet for a particular time and meet in a public place. The local library has book review groups, but they usually meet in the daytime so I can't attend. If you play a musical instrument or sing, join a band or choir. As soon as a few connections are made, possibly even one, it gets less painful. As soon as you join a group and have reason to meet up with the same people again, connections start happening. The common interest fans the flame. The common interest is the important thing: my daughter and son-in-law [mid 20's] starting showing up at a particular spot where people fly model helicopters on Saturday mornings. The people at the hobby shop told them where to go. They made friends with a variety of folks, including a man in his mid 60's. If you were Greek in college, that is a possibility. Read Mauve Binchy's book, Evening Class; it is a nice read and shows some possibilities. I think it will start getting better in a month. It is hard at first, but the most important thing is meeting the new person/people consistantly, like weekly. NOTE: My husband and I were childless and dogless for many years before the first child came along. If you are fortunate enough to have children, that is another way to meet people, as is taking Fido to the local dog park at about the same time every day. Again: small groups are the key. That has been my experience..... Good luck to you!
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Old 12-27-2012, 08:58 PM
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I have moved many, many times and the only advice I have is to accept the move and venture out often. Get a new routine so you feel that you have some sort of control of your life. Meet people and start jogging, or walking the same route everyday - that helps me get acquainted with the area as well as establish a new and eventually familiar routine.
My biggest help is the realization that I can always move again...
Enjoy Florida - many people go there to die
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Old 12-27-2012, 09:20 PM
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It probably takes longer than four days and less than four years.
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Old 12-27-2012, 10:23 PM
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Depends on the person.
I moved from Wyoming to Las Vegas.. i never ever got used to it and hated it! When the chance to move to Colorado came up - i jumped at the chance. I'm a Rocky mountain region girl.

Las Vegas was a climate change, atmosphere change, and the culture shock... omg..

My suggestion is to get involved in your community... meetup groups, etc.. I did try these things in Vegas which helped me tolerate it a bit more.
Another suggestion.. see if one of your co workers would be willing to take you around to see the area, a sight seeing tour. Get to know where you stores are, drive around to just drive and see things.

Depending on what "changes" you're facing and what type of person you are will depend on how soon it feels like home.

Good luck
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Old 12-28-2012, 05:35 AM
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I have moved a lot and depending on things it took different amounts of time. I have been told though and in some ways from the experiences I have had 6 months to really know. You have to give yourself time to make friends,learn the area etc. Even finding things like a favorite coffee shop makes things feel more like home.
Do you know people in the area? I agree about joining a group or a gym even to meet people. Finding the local things like libraries,banks,restaurants etc also can help.
It is normal to have mixed emotions and even have times of tears. Just give yourself time
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Old 12-28-2012, 03:40 PM
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I'm moving from Florida to California soon. That won't be as big of a change, although things do operate differently on the other end of the country. But there will definitely be some adjusting to do.

I think you are definitely going to need longer than 4 days to get used to the routine there.
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Old 12-28-2012, 04:10 PM
Location: South Florida
4,785 posts, read 5,322,839 times
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Give it at least 6 months.
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Old 12-28-2012, 05:30 PM
Location: The Great White North
414 posts, read 884,536 times
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Some people say 2 years, but I feel like that's a bit extreme. I start to feel more settled after 2-3 months, and it usually increases from there. At minimum give it 6 months.

All that said, sometimes there are locations that just don't agree with a person or family, and you should be open to that. Give it a chance, but if you don't feel it after a year AND you've made a strong effort to acclimate, take a look around and reassess your situation.

Source: Moving 10-11 times in the past 24 years
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Old 12-30-2012, 05:21 PM
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I move about every 6 months for my job between states. I've lived in 3 so far in the past 1.5 years.

I'd say the first few weeks are very difficult for me, simply not knowing the best stores and how to get around.

I think the best way to appreciate your new abode is to take advantage of the sights to see and things to do around you. I like visiting landmarks and making friends to immediately make it an enjoyable experience. However, nowhere feels like home after only 6 months.

But after about 2 months, I don't feel as strange. There's the possibility it'll never truly feel like "back home", but that's not necessarily a bad thing.
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