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Thanks everyone for your words of support. My DH and I had decided we were going to try and stick it out. And then last Friday my 16 was attacked at school. She is doing ok, but the principal is doing nothing!! She was attacked by a football player and they are in the playoff's, so who knows where this will end up. I have been down there everyday and have spoken with the police and an attorney.
Since we have been here, we have had to evacuate our home because there was an "unexplainable exploding device" found in the neighbors yard, a registered child molester moved in three doors down, and a man at the corner of our yard with a gun. The police responded quickly, but still.
I AM a happy person and have tried over and over to make this work and it seems like everytime we make up our minds that we will stay, something else happens. I did do as much research as possible before moving (soothsayer) and had as much prelim stuff, such as a job etc lined up. Job fell through, etc, etc...
We still can't move back to where we came from, but I have decided we are leaving this summer. My family is too much at risk. And bytheway, all of the incidents that have occured in my neighborhood, are "first time" events. Lol, that's what all the neighbor's keep telling me. Crazy, huh?!
Anyway, I'll keep ya'll posted and my head up. I know one day we'll look back on this and laugh. I know we'll be alright.
Thanks again!
Happee, I don't blame you for leaving, you gave it a try, I tryed to but enough is enough. I didn't tell you, but me & my families final decission to move out of NC was when my beautiful 20yr old nephew-Michael got in a car accident and was taken from his mom & us (his family) - I feel this state is evil, my soul never felt at ease here, and I will never, ever step foot in NC again after I leave. Good luck, I think your making the right decission.
OMIGOSH Sue! I am SOO sorry to hear about your nephew. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I hope your move goes smoothy and that ya'll will be able to move soon.
YOU KNOW,I THINK THAT SUMS IT UP,AS SIMPLE AS IT SEEMS...(IN SOME CASES.)
I disagree. A couple of us refuted this idea on the previous page of this thread. It is occasionally true, but I could spend all day thinking of scenarios where this would be untrue and unfair. In the extreme, few of us would be happy in prison or as prisoners of war, or in countries at war, or in extremely impoverished countries ... the middle ground is that you might have someone who loves the ocean who moves to the middle of the country and is miserable, but moves back to the ocean and is happy again. Or someone who is unhappy away from family. When I went to do a masters degree in my mid-20s, I was in a shabby, dreary dorm in a place I found kind of dreary, and I was terribly miserable. Then I finished, went back to work, lived in a nice upscale place, and I was happy again. On your end, yes, some people have internal reasons that they are unhappy and they might move thinking a new location is the answer, and it probably isn't.
YOU KNOW,I THINK THAT SUMS IT UP,AS SIMPLE AS IT SEEMS...(IN SOME CASES.)
I completely disagree! I've tried and tried to be happy in a place that is just completely wrong for us! I am extremely grateful to have my family with me and there are things that I think of everyday that make me happy.And quite honestly I still consider myself a happy person, and I hate it here! I won't go on and on, but the place is dangerous and a detriment to my family and just because I hate where I'm living and am unhappy about that, does not mean that I can just change my attitude and make this a safe place. I do think that having a negative attitude can make any situation worse, but putting on rose colored glasses and ignoring the danger signs can get people hurt.
I Dont Understand The Disagreement- I Said ,"in Some Cases." There Is Truth In That Statement! Believe Me ,ive Moved ,too. More Than 30 Times-so I Think I Can Comment Without The Entire Forum Rallying "we Disagreeeee...":d
At the risk of being overly-philosophical ... it seems to me that happiness has at least two aspects, one being how a person is, inherently, such as being generally good-natured and "happy" whether it is raining or snowing, etc., and the other being circumstantial, being more happy if things are going well, less so otherwise. Yes, I am over-simplifying. But I tend to think that our happiness is a combination of these factors. Some people are more sensitive to small things, e.g., unhappy if it rains, and some are more sensitive to bigger things, e.g., being incarcerated, losing a child, etc.
I am generally a happy person. I am happy ( almost ) regardless of my circumstances, but if things are really bad, if something really bothers me, then I seek to change either myself or my circumstances, sometimes both.
I love it here where I am, yet there is something about being here that I cannot live with, so I am moving. And in moving I am also changing myself, because I really don't want to take this thing with me.
But, the real point to this thread is that someone is unhappy, is having a difficult time, and is trying to work through her circumstances and improve things. I applaud that, and everyone here who offers encouragement.
I WAS happier living someplace that wasn't such a cold, hard, slog all the time. 2006 was supposed to be my year to move and see snow never again. But then the housing market crashed and I can't sell my home. For 15 years, I've lived in the future looking forward to the day I could leave.
Sometimes bad things just happen. I figure there's nothing I can do but try to make the best of it and accomplish the most I can. Things will sort themselves out in the end. There's still things I can do here like save more money and pursue educational goals. I just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other until things change. It's not my fault but I can refuse to be a victim and make constructive use of my time here.
I Dont Understand The Disagreement- I Said ,"in Some Cases." There Is Truth In That Statement! Believe Me ,ive Moved ,too. More Than 30 Times-so I Think I Can Comment Without The Entire Forum Rallying "we Disagreeeee...":d
Sorry if it seemed that way! I found the original quote (the one you were referencing) quite insensitive under the circumstances. I usually don't get so fiesty on this forum, but one of the main points of the regional forums is to find locations where we will be most happy; and then these general forums are for supporting each other, at least in a case like this where someone is having some problems with a relocation.
I don't know if anyone remembers the line from "Breakfast at Tiffany's" (the movie) - "...[your problem is] no matter where you run, you always end up running into yourself ...". I was like that as a teenager - I thought that I could find some sort of cure to everything by going somewhere else. But then I would get there and I was still left with the same problems. But of course, in this specific context, happeemommee's context, there has been nothing to suggest this is at all applicable. We're dealing here with concrete issues and thus, trying to help in specific, concrete, supportive ways. But Jana Mania, your input is valued here so sorry if it seemed otherwise.
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Sounds Too Simple
