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ok so let me tell you a little about what is going on
i'm 21 i live in TN with my mom
i am in a long distance relationship and have been for 4 years
i think its time to move closer to him, he can't move because of some reasons so im going to be moving to him (which i do not mind at all!)
he lives in New Jersey about an hour from franklin
yes we have talked about it and yes i know its not going to be a fairytale.. after all weren't fairytales meant to scare kids btw thank you germans for your killer stories!
ok so anyways, i'm 21 i have about 6 years in costumer service been working since i could legally work. In memphis its hard for me to find a job i'm not sure why i can pretty much do any kind of work if i put my mind to it (labor work such as cutting grass and all that good stuff, can work warehouse lifting stuff... anything if you show me how to do it), i had a job and my boss promised to send me to school to get my insurance license but then she ended up changing her mind and well things didn't go as planned...
so i have no family over there to help me and my mother isn't even interested in giving me a boost or anything so i will be doing this all on my own
there is a place in franklin called quad graphics my dad use to work for them and its warehouse work 12 hrs a day but you get like 3-4 days off every 2 weeks or something like that
anyways i think its overwhelming for me because i don't know where to start i feel like i'm just running around in circles, do i look for work there in new jersey or do i try to find a place first i mean how should i go about this? should i live in franklin and work at quad until me and him are ready to move in together or should i find somewhere that i work less hours in one day? i mean what should i do? i know its not going to happen this year but i'm hoping to bust my butt with work and save money to help move me there so maybe in the next yea and a half i'd like to be down there.. well up there...
Get a job and save your money, would def. not go until you have saved a lot of money, you'll go thru it fast in NJ. Have you even met the guy? How much money have you saved? Do you know how much apartments cost in NJ? What kind of research have you done?
You're 21, it's your life, not sure why you think your mother should give you any money, she's supported you for 21 years, those days are over...
When did your father work in Sussex, NJ? Realistically, what makes you think they'd hire you - ? We're in a recession and jobs are hard to find by anyone. It's darn difficult esp. if you have no experience or arent qualified in certain areas. Any young person can do manual labor, as well as illegal immigrants. If you can lift boxes, try for UPS but Im not even sure if they're hiring and if they are, they prob. have a list of possible applicants a mile long.
It does sound like you're running in circles. How can you live in Franklin w/o a job? It's a very rural area and you prob. wouldn't last long. Do you own a car - ? Buses run very irregularly in NJ at best and Franklin might be sorely hurting for public transportation, it's waaay diff. than Memphis and they do get a lot of snow in the winter.
My suggestions w/b to keep working and take on an add'l part time job to save as much money as you can if you plan on following thru w/ the eventual move or go back to school to do something you're really interested in. Would also advise meeting the guy before making any plans, you dont want to be stuck in NJ w/o a way to support yourself.
I am usually not against somewhat spur of the moment moves as long as no children are involved. I've seen some rather spontaneous (but still well planned) moves work well, when expectations are realistic, and preparations are made.
I have seen this even when the mover has no friends in the new area, and does not have a job. So I am not a naysayer, in this regard.
However, in your case, idea seems particularly ill conceived. I'm also concerned that you are moving because of a significant other. That can especially go wrong. And if it does, you will be in another state, a very, very expensive state I might add, with no money and no friends.
That's not good.
I agree with Honey Crisp. It sounds as though you are "running in circles" and you don't seem focused.
I also agree with HC that it might be a good idea to go back to school and study something that really fascinates you, and gives you direction and purpose.
Do not go. Long distance relationship doesn't work. I been through one when I was your age. Lucky I was moving school but I was miserable in that school. I ended up broke up with her a year later.
NJ is a terrible place to live. Job don't pay well after you take into the cost of living here. If you decide to run you own business, the cost will turn you off.
I live in NJ for about 4 years and can't wait to move out
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btw thank you germans for your killer stories! 
