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Old 01-22-2014, 09:23 AM
 
66 posts, read 99,497 times
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I'm a single parent who will be moving out of state soon and one of my main concerns is where we will stay. Do you think living with a roommate along with my 2 year old is a bad idea? Or would an extended stay hotel/motel be more wise although it may be more pricey...? Any other ideas?
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Old 01-22-2014, 09:32 AM
 
Location: League City, Texas
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A roommate as in somebody you would find through an ad? Or someone you already know?
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Old 01-22-2014, 09:55 AM
 
66 posts, read 99,497 times
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I'd prefer to move with somebody I already know (move out of state together) but I'm scared that may mess with the friendship because issues like bills come up. From your opinion (or anyone else who may be reading) which do you think would be the "better" choice?
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Old 01-22-2014, 10:08 AM
 
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A couple questions:

-- Do you have a job/daycare lined up where you're going?
-- Do you know a lot of people in your new city?

Extended stay hotels imply a more temporary arrangement to me -- a place to set-up shop while searching for a more permanent residence. Living with a roommate would imply a longer-term lease.

Personally, I wouldn't move in with a friend who had a 2 year old unless I really had no other option. Nothing against kids, at all, but that arrangement wouldn't be my cup of tea for a lot of reasons. And if I were a parent, I absolutely wouldn't move my kid in with an unknown roommate.

What is your current living situation? Why are you moving?
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Old 01-22-2014, 10:19 AM
 
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@thatswanlady Thanks for your honesty. I'm currently doing research on a few day cares; and unfortunately no I won't know anybody in my new city. Thanks for your insight. I currently am staying with my parents saving up money and also storage food. I just ended the lease on my old apartment. I've wanted to move since I finished HS; I even had a couple thousand saved up at 17 to prepare to move. But mainly bad memories, very little support (besides the temporary live in w/ my parents where we have no privacy), and I want to start new. Mentally I moved a long time ago if that makes sense lol.
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Old 01-22-2014, 10:20 AM
 
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you could try the roommate thing but have a by the week or month place lined up in case you need it.
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Old 01-22-2014, 10:21 AM
 
21,109 posts, read 13,559,056 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by movinonup11 View Post
@thatswanlady Thanks for your honesty. I'm currently doing research on a few day cares; and unfortunately no I won't know anybody in my new city. Thanks for your insight. I currently am staying with my parents saving up money and also storage food. I just ended the lease on my old apartment. I've wanted to move since I finished HS; I even had a couple thousand saved up at 17 to prepare to move. But mainly bad memories, very little support (besides the temporary live in w/ my parents where we have no privacy), and I want to start new. Mentally I moved a long time ago if that makes sense lol.
Well, if you are going to answer an ad or whatever I say NO WAY, especially with a 2 year old.
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Old 01-22-2014, 10:25 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by movinonup11 View Post
@thatswanlady Thanks for your honesty. I'm currently doing research on a few day cares; and unfortunately no I won't know anybody in my new city. Thanks for your insight. I currently am staying with my parents saving up money and also storage food. I just ended the lease on my old apartment. I've wanted to move since I finished HS; I even had a couple thousand saved up at 17 to prepare to move. But mainly bad memories, very little support (besides the temporary live in w/ my parents where we have no privacy), and I want to start new. Mentally I moved a long time ago if that makes sense lol.
I get that.

But can I give you a nickel's worth of advice for free?

Do not move until you have a job and a plan, and at least a few months of living expenses saved up. I know living with the parents can be a drag once you reach adulthood -- and I imagine, especially once you have a kid -- but moving without a plan, a job, and some savings is just asking for a harder path than is necessary.

If your parents are agreeable, stay with them for awhile longer to really get yourself set. Especially since there is a kid around, you don't want to remove them from their environment until you're reasonably positive you'll be putting them into a calm and stable environment in their new place.

A few more months seems like a long time now, but is nothing in the scheme of life. I wish I had listened to similar advice when I moved across the country several years ago. I did have a job, albeit a very low-paying one, but no place to live and no real savings or plan. In the end, I don't regret the experience because of what it taught me, but I did wind up moving home less than two years later with a good amount of debt. And I didn't have a kid and associated kid-expenses to pay for.

Sacrifice the short-term privacy for long-term stability. I promise, it's worth it.
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Old 01-22-2014, 11:06 AM
 
66 posts, read 99,497 times
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@jencam Thank you. I definitely won't be trying the ad thing.
@thatswanlady I really appreciate the advice and you sharing your experience. I wasn't planning on moving for another 6 months so I will have everything planned by then. I may try to get a job where I would be able to transfer out of state, or a temp agency w/ multiple locations. I will take what you said to heart. I have one more question: Since the roommate situation is more than likely out of the question would you suggest an extended stay hotel or try to find a landlord who will rent to someone who is newly local, and has a new job as well (if that's possible)? Sorry for all the questions I'm just still young and don't want to be careless.
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Old 01-22-2014, 11:09 AM
 
Location: OH>IL>CO>CT
7,515 posts, read 13,618,508 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by movinonup11 View Post
I'm a single parent who will be moving out of state soon and one of my main concerns is where we will stay. Do you think living with a roommate along with my 2 year old is a bad idea? Or would an extended stay hotel/motel be more wise although it may be more pricey...? Any other ideas?
Have you considered or looked into any locally owned & operated motels with kitchenette units ? I know in the Denver area there are several that are used by single moms in a transition situation. They rent units on weekly or monthly rates, not near as expensive as the big name extended stay places.

You might also look into what's available thru https://www.airbnb.com/ , but that could have some of the same "roommate" issues, and there could be some who don't take young children.
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