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Old 07-07-2016, 11:10 PM
 
427 posts, read 376,360 times
Reputation: 428

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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShanIAmVA View Post
I decided one day to just stop working. So now I lay around in bed or on the couch, I eat ice-cream for breakfast and start drinking at 11:59 every day. Oh, and of course I binge watch Netflix.

Then that dream ends when my alarm goes off. I get up, shave my legs and off to work I go.

You know the saying, "You get what you pay for". I pay for a 3 bedroom, 2 bath home in a rural community and I'm able to budget for new cars and steak dinners. I studied hard and got a job that affords me that luxury. Other people work harder than me and have bigger houses and more expensive cars. Which is great! But for me I work just hard enough to give me what is good enough. I like being a productive member of society.
That all sounds fab, but it's not that I don't really want to work, it's just that working doesn't seem to be "working out" for me. I've been three times in the past six months, and have walked out of the job on another occasion.

I would love to know how people function in society and seem happy doing so. I've been miserable my whole life -- I had my first mental breakdown at age 15, starting medication shortly after -- so I don't have a reference point as to how it's done.
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Old 07-08-2016, 01:53 AM
 
Location: Living on the Coast in Oxnard CA
15,672 posts, read 26,616,004 times
Reputation: 20236
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryinbaby View Post
I don't deliver pizza. I work on and off for a good delivery app that is popular here, whenever I can get a shift.

Because you asked, my degree is toilet paper. I haven't done anything with it since graduating two years ago. All it ever was was a ticket to grad school. I am not a very intelligent person (my IQ is only 104) and it was a huge struggle to just get that degree. I often was at the edge of my sanity spending hours and hours just write a one paragraph abstract or a two page paper. I only got good grades because my professors knew how I hard I worked and how little of it came natural.

As to why I've been fired multiple times, I don't know. Twice they stopped giving me shifts or calling me in altogether. Another time, serving at a Japanese restaurant, I didn't last past the trial period. Can't say I don't blame them because I didn't want to follow the cumbersome Engrish (not English) script they gave me and went for a more natural, comfortable. Because of how short term my jobs have been, I have nothing to put on my resume for the past two years.

So yes, I've given up. I do not fit in anywhere and I would like very much to be left alone.
Sorry for the confusion, because in another thread you wrote:

"Tonight I delivered some food to a pro athlete in an upscale apartment complex in Beverly Hills, and some members of his entourage were laughing in my face, yelling "PIZzZa MAan," like I am some clown or leper deserving to be mocked. My life is in the absolute gutter right now, and it's a shame that people not in my shoes feel like they can treat me like this."

OK so it is a delivery company. No problem.

One thing I can say about getting fired, if it happens once maybe it is a misunderstanding. If it keeps happening then maybe it is the person getting fired. Maybe you need to look deep at yourself and see what is going on. We all need to change from time to time. Nothing wrong with that. Recently I found myself in need of a change both at home and at work. What I found was a good mentor to help me get past some things. It has helped a lot with my progress and success in life. Always find a mentor that you can latch onto.

Observations I have made over the years:

1. No one will keep you down. No one needs to keep anyone down, we do a good job of that on our own.

2. Success is possible for anyone. Maybe not epic success but moderate success is possible. Saying that it is possible and very probable to become a millionaire in your lifetime. It may take time but it is possible.

3. The three words that every successful person understands are: Work, work and work. Anything can be yours if you are willing to work for it.

4. Write a life plan. This is a detailed point by point description of how you want to get from where you are in life to where you want to be. I would start by determining what you want out of life and put that in great detail. Include pictures, drawings, anything that will explain what you are moving toward. Remember when a developer builds a building the plans are so detailed that anyone can read the plans and figure it out. That is how your life plan should be.

5. You do not need a degree to succeed in life. Degree's are part of a plan. They are not the plan. Plenty of very successful people never went to school and many that went dropped out because school got in the way of their life plan.

6. Complaining never helps. Crying never helps. Telling people about your problems never helps. The truth is people do not care about peoples problems. No one wants to hear someone complain. What people do want to hear is solutions. They want to see that someone is in a bad spot and have figured out a solution.
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Old 07-08-2016, 04:20 AM
 
Location: I'm out searching for me... If you see me, let me know... ;--)
3,335 posts, read 1,819,735 times
Reputation: 7399
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryinbaby View Post
That all sounds fab, but it's not that I don't really want to work, it's just that working doesn't seem to be "working out" for me. I've been three times in the past six months, and have walked out of the job on another occasion.

I would love to know how people function in society and seem happy doing so. I've been miserable my whole life -- I had my first mental breakdown at age 15, starting medication shortly after -- so I don't have a reference point as to how it's done.
I feel for you because I've faced mental health issues all my life. At times it was very, very rough. I grew up with angry parents who gave little guidance. I had no idea how to make it- my life - work after I didn't finish college.

The best thing I did was kept trying jobs, ideas, asking for assistance (counseling, charity for my utilities [hated that] ) anything that might help. I was approved for housing through section 8 due to my depression. I returned to school and got my Education degree I have had some success in daycare jobs and other education positions. I decided to try grad school (didn't work out) and moved to TN. Horrible six years followed until I returned to WI this past Sept.

But getting the help for my depression has been difficult. What I didn't understand was the lack of guidance and help to how life works ( how to learn, be social with peers, and others, how to find what you need) and not having someone to really lean on, created deep insecurities.

Soooo, now, in the present how am I how am I doing? Well, I found a crisis line (a warm line- counselors let you talk about anything that is bothering you) that gave me people who care and really listen. I was homeless for four months but I have an apt now. Even with section 8 my city is tough for apts. I have ins through the state and I started looking for a counselor (tried one, didn't work out).

I have a part time job (I cut my hours to handle my mental illiness issues) at a grocery store. I have plans to get a daycare job as a substitute teacher or a part-time position. After I have dealt with my mental illness, I'll go full time.

Sorry so long but I wanted to show the process I've gone through.

My best suggestion is finding anything that helps you. Talk to your psychologist for anything she can refer you to. Google assistance help- housing, food, clothing, churches, homeless resources, etc... Keep talking about your issues. Especially share what you've said in this post about how is a person suppose to make when they don't know how.

You've faced a lot of problems along negative attiudes of other people. Don't let them get you down. Remind yourself that you have got this far, and you had to be strong to do that.

Keep going- I'll keep trying to get through the maze of my life too!

Last edited by Wild Flower; 07-08-2016 at 04:29 AM..
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Old 07-08-2016, 08:05 AM
 
Location: State of Grace
1,578 posts, read 1,128,131 times
Reputation: 2614
Perhaps a job as a night janitor or watchman would be up your alley. No one around to bother you. No stress. Not a great paycheck, but a good one, good enough to give you choices anyway.

If you could either rent a studio apartment or live in your car or a van, which would you choose?

I know a few people who live in vans or RVs who are permitted to park in the place where they have a job as a night watchman/woman.

After reading everything on this thread thus far, it seems to me that you're not much of a 'people person.' (Please forgive me if that is an incorrect observation.) Janitorial, and in particular night watchmen positions, offer you a *peaceful* way to make a living. What do you think of trying that on for size?

After a couple of years of an unbroken night watchman position, you ought to be able to upgrade to a security guard position. Those jobs usually come with benefits and good pay.

You could also start a car washing/detailing business. A housecleaning (or office cleaning) business. A landscaping business. The list goes on. At the moment it sounds as if the fewer people you have to interact with on the job, the better. Perhaps when you have gained more confidence and abilities (expertise in any area), you might feel differently about interacting with people.

There will always be people who look down on you in this life, no matter how successful you are. Google the name of *any* successful person and read the 'hate' speech that inevitably goes with the territory. DO NOT let other people define you. Take insults for what they are - rude and unfounded comments made by cruel and ignorant people. If anyone tosses you an insult, toss 'em back a 'knowing' smile. Nothing ticks them off more.

Blessings to you,


Mahrie.
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Old 07-11-2016, 01:07 AM
 
427 posts, read 376,360 times
Reputation: 428
I really don't want to be homeless, but I don't think living with 25 people is that great of a situation. Especially in this neighborhood. I don't have enough privacy to sing, or do anything that I love to do. The singing issue is especially hard on me. I need to do it to stay sane. In the past I would sing like six hours a day.

I'm going to start experimenting with spending as little time in the flophouse as I can and see what it's like.
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Old 07-11-2016, 02:16 AM
 
1,921 posts, read 1,310,067 times
Reputation: 3175
I used to love just driving out on the highway or back roads, singing to my music as loud as I could. I think once you get to where you're not embarrassed by it, and you can laugh at it, you can do it anywhere. I can think of plenty of times, where I would be singing loud as I could, (tool, type o negative, ozzy, pantera) the song would end, I would drive another 1/4 mile and I would then see people who were looking at me funny. I could tell they heard me from way back there. It would crack me up and make my day. If you get embarrassed just start with the windows up. It definitely does feel good to get into the music.
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Old 07-11-2016, 07:40 AM
 
Location: The Jar
20,070 posts, read 14,345,600 times
Reputation: 36804
Simple:

Get out of Los Angeles!
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Old 07-19-2016, 03:15 AM
 
427 posts, read 376,360 times
Reputation: 428
I've found several private rooms in much better neighborhoods for almost the same price I'm paying to live here. This place is a scam!
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Old 07-19-2016, 08:16 AM
 
1,921 posts, read 1,310,067 times
Reputation: 3175
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryinbaby View Post
I've found several private rooms in much better neighborhoods for almost the same price I'm paying to live here. This place is a scam!
Thanks for the update, that's great news, and glad to hear your situation is improving. Best of luck.
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Old 07-20-2016, 09:47 AM
 
717 posts, read 679,324 times
Reputation: 1080
Educate yourself. You don't need to go to school to do that. Read Tony Robbins "Awaken the Giant Within". Read "What Color is My Parachute". You can get them from the library. To get out of your depression you need to create a plan (as mentioned by SOON2B) and figure out how to get there. Read what others have done. We all need guidance in life. If you didn't receive any from your parents, find a mentor. Books are a great place to start.

Right now you're just flopping and complaining and feeling lost (been there!). That won't get you anywhere, so find some direction and set out. And if first you don't succeed, try, try again!
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