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Old 12-28-2016, 09:43 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 121,868 times
Reputation: 74

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Meemur View Post
Lifeseeker, you need more help in the real world than an internet forum can give you.

You need a counselor/social worker immediately, as in first thing in the morning.

Start with your local community mental health services. You can use Google to find the address or if that is too hard for you, go to the public library and get help from the librarian. Once you get the address, confirm they are open and go there tomorrow. Tell them the same thing that you have posted to this forum. If they can't help you, ask what other resources they might recommend.

If you don't have community mental health services nearby, contact the department of human services and explain that you are low income and need to find a job training program. You also need counseling. Again, tell the social worker the same things that you have posted to this forum.

If your home life were somewhat normal, I would strongly encourage you to go home, but in this case, I think you are better off seeking help in the real world right where you are. I suspect you might have ADHD or other type of social or learning disorder that needs professional intervention so that you can get your life on track.

You may also need to go live in a group home or other supervised situation for awhile to help you learn the necessary life skills that you need to succeed.

It's all up to you, now. Go seek out help in the real world. Don't take "no" for an answer. You can turn this situation around!
I was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age (ADD but now all ADD is called ADHD). I'm scared if I don't live here or go home that I will end up homeless, and/or taken advantage of.

I was going to live with a friend (ok more than friend) but that plan is gone, it would have been weird with her husband living in the same house. I left home before she was even going to come get me because unexpected events happened.

If I go anywhere else I will have to sneak away and be vague with my family again, saying nothing but I went somewhere else and I am ok.

Stay in a homeless shelter? That's terrifying. And even if it's a homeless shelter that DOES help you get a job, a job is NOT A RIGHT in America.

I was very sheltered my whole life, and have spent a mere day or two in a big city, where I almost got mugged and robbed and WAS actually robbed behind my back and through manipulation. I never want to be in a ghetto again!

I have many discomforts of going back home, but don't have another option. The pros are, I might get a job, (it's a city with many jobs, not really big less than 120,000 people), I might make friends, I might get a girlfriend, I might get laid, nobody will know who I am. Oh, and I will have a stable living condition for at least 18 months (rent lease length). It shouldn't take months to gain some kind of employment, and it shouldn't take more than 6 months to save up if I keep the job and move on and move away.

I wish I was a troll, but I'm real, I just have a VERY dysfunctional and messed up life, if I had a gun I'd probably take myself out. Like all suicidal people, I don't actually want to die, I just want to stop suffering.

The best, safest, and funnest places to live are big cities, and expensive parts of them. Lower cost area equals the ghetto, bunch of druggie, violent, hating, dangerous, pieces of (you know what). Weed and guns and knives everywhere wielded by dangerous people. And you better not be a different race than them, that's the worst problem, not being their race. Yo white boy what you doing here? "Yo white girl what up?" "Yo man you wanna buy some weed?" "Yo man I need some money, you better give me your money or I'll stab you". Bunch of womanizing, lazy ***, baby making, welfare abusing, trouble making scumbags. And the ladies? They are whores. Sure, some good people may be stuck living in the ghetto, but most are bad people. I can't say all are bad cause some family of family live in them, but most ghetto people are BAD PEOPLE.

You want to live in a safe place? You better make enough money to live in a area that is safe, far from civilization, and cheap, OR safe, IN civilization, and EXPENSIVE.

I may be incorrect about some things, but I only know about life from years of TVs and movies, and a few days in the urban world, and the godawful ghetto.

Last edited by LifeSeeker21; 12-28-2016 at 10:07 PM..

 
Old 12-28-2016, 09:44 PM
 
Location: Des Moines Metro
5,045 posts, read 5,966,482 times
Reputation: 9424
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ceece View Post
I can't tell if you have a real mental illness or millenialitis.
I'm thinking ADHD or similar. Too many topics in too short of a space.
 
Old 12-28-2016, 09:47 PM
 
Location: Des Moines Metro
5,045 posts, read 5,966,482 times
Reputation: 9424
Quote:
Originally Posted by LifeSeeker21 View Post
I was diagnosed with ADHD at a young age (ADD but now all ADD is called ADHD). I'm scared if I don't live here or go home that I will end up homeless, and/or taken advantage of.

[snip]

If I go anywhere else I will have to sneak away and be vague with my family again, saying nothing but I went somewhere else and I am ok.
OP, please go get help, or you will end up as you fear. You are broke! I would be very surprised if you didn't quality for some sort of training/counseling. Your state still has a fair amount of social services, unlike mine.
 
Old 12-28-2016, 10:09 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 121,868 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by Meemur View Post
I'm thinking ADHD or similar. Too many topics in too short of a space.
I was diagnosed with ADD at a young age, but now all doctors call all ADD ADHD. I took meds for my ADD before, Adderall, it was the worst thing that ever happened to me, I may or may not have wrote about that somewhere on the forums.
 
Old 12-28-2016, 10:10 PM
 
Location: WA
878 posts, read 465,299 times
Reputation: 2681
You have come to the aha moment of inspirational dissatisfaction. I don't know if Napoleon Hill was the first one to use the term, but if you are feeling like you'll never be able to make it in this system, please read the book "Think and Grow Rich."

It was first published 80 years ago so it's available free online. The title is misleading. It isn't really about money, but about finding out what you really want to be doing. If you aren't satisfied right now, there are things you can do to at least put you on a path to something better.

After reading it, you will have to decide if you are going to try to be a self-supporting person in our capitalist system. You can still be "in it and not of it." No one said capitalism was perfect, but in order to get by you will need to participate at least for a while. Unless you want to go full hippie, you NEED a decent income to get by.

Another concept I hope you understand is delayed gratification. You may have to focus all of you energy into a goal that may take years to achieve. During that time you won't enjoy all of the work required to get there.

It's never easy. I don't think most people get up every day and say "Oh boy, I get to go to work!" It's more like UGHH! I have to get up so I don't go broke and have creditors after me for the next 5 years!
 
Old 12-28-2016, 10:10 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 121,868 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by Meemur View Post
OP, please go get help, or you will end up as you fear. You are broke! I would be very surprised if you didn't quality for some sort of training/counseling. Your state still has a fair amount of social services, unlike mine.
Which state? The one I am in now or the one I am supposed to go back to? I don't really have a stable address at the moment.......................
 
Old 12-28-2016, 10:19 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 121,868 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by Meemur View Post
Lifeseeker, you need more help in the real world than an internet forum can give you.

You need a counselor/social worker immediately, as in first thing in the morning.

Start with your local community mental health services. You can use Google to find the address or if that is too hard for you, go to the public library and get help from the librarian. Once you get the address, confirm they are open and go there tomorrow. Tell them the same thing that you have posted to this forum. If they can't help you, ask what other resources they might recommend.

If you don't have community mental health services nearby, contact the department of human services and explain that you are low income and need to find a job training program. You also need counseling. Again, tell the social worker the same things that you have posted to this forum.

If your home life were somewhat normal, I would strongly encourage you to go home, but in this case, I think you are better off seeking help in the real world right where you are. I suspect you might have ADHD or other type of social or learning disorder that needs professional intervention so that you can get your life on track.

You may also need to go live in a group home or other supervised situation for awhile to help you learn the necessary life skills that you need to succeed.

It's all up to you, now. Go seek out help in the real world. Don't take "no" for an answer. You can turn this situation around!
I was thinking maybe I could go home, and always be gone job hunting and then working. Seek help in the real world right where I am? And be homeless?
 
Old 12-28-2016, 11:05 PM
 
Location: TOVCCA
8,452 posts, read 11,366,744 times
Reputation: 12302
Quote:
Originally Posted by LifeSeeker21 View Post
Sounds like you're messing with me.
I am absolutely not messing with you. I think you may even have some talent for that kind of work.

Having ADHD can often enhance an ability to work with the arts. Tarot cards primarily involve visual art and what a certain picture means to you.

Don't close your mind to this means of supporting yourself and getting out of your difficult predicament.
 
Old 12-28-2016, 11:48 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 121,868 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by nightlysparrow View Post
I am absolutely not messing with you. I think you may even have some talent for that kind of work.

Having ADHD can often enhance an ability to work with the arts. Tarot cards primarily involve visual art and what a certain picture means to you.

Don't close your mind to this means of supporting yourself and getting out of your difficult predicament.
I've had great desires to become a YouTube star, many different theme ideas. Animation, Let's Plays, Song Parodies, Social Experiments, Skits, etc. But so much discouragement. The people who make a living on YouTube (millions a year or not) are the exception not the rule. And, going viral on YouTube or even making a penny is even more unlikely than winning the lottery.

This is actually another great example of an open market to make money, anyone can join, but it's VERY HARD and requires A LOT of luck, and maybe skill, to hit it big (or even hit one view!).

Some big YouTubers, PewDiePie (he actually just hit 50 million subscribers by telling people he'd delete his channel when he reached that many, but he didn't delete it, that would have been throwing SO MUCH away if he did!) ,Smosh, Tobuscus, shane (Shane Dawson), JennaMarbles, EpicMealTime, The Fine Bros., CollegeHumor, ExplosmEntertaiment (mostly Cyanide & Happiness) others. And there are many more smaller YouTube channels that make less but still do good. cobanermani456, The Carrot and Potato Show, boogie2988, just to name a few. Data is from socialblade, the statistics are on there. You just type in a YouTube channel and it'll show everything, including estimated monthly and yearly incomes.
 
Old 12-29-2016, 12:21 AM
 
Location: USA
1,722 posts, read 593,009 times
Reputation: 3804
Quote:
Originally Posted by LifeSeeker21 View Post
I was thinking maybe I could go home, and always be gone job hunting and then working.
I know it's not comforting to hear now, but many come for unstable homes. Still, it's good to have your feet firmly on the ground financially, before leaving... that in itself, shows you can put your best interests first & make adult decisions, which benefit you. Your thinking is spot on here in going home & not being there as you're job hunting, then working. Go home before you get into trouble in one way or another... I'm mostly thinking financially.

Once you begin working, you can find a roommate or a few roommates & move out, even if it's a short term situation. Neither situation... living at home or with a roommate, is forever. Is it perfect? Not always. Sometimes we have to pick the best option at the time, but be safe in doing so. You already had the solution to your own answer... live at home but spend scant time there.

Also, I find that physical exercise helps release my pent up frustrations immensely. Friends can even tell when I haven't exercised that day... they say I usually float into a room after swimming & when I miss it for any reason, I kind of storm into a room. Problems float off my back when I'm physically active doing something I enjoy... even a long walk.

Get onto a schedule... leave home in the morning, go to Starbucks, the library or another place where you can use free WiFi to look for jobs, find a few local groups to help you meet new people (book club, job hunting group, people your age who gather around some hobby... pick a hobby... it will give you something else to focus on), schedule your exercise (walking is easy & free) into your calendar as if it's an appt & just do it.

Some people spend their whole day in the library for many reasons... retired, job seekers, those who need to use the library's computers or just take advantage of the free WiFi, kids doing homework.

Begin to read for an hour each day. Something inspirational. If you listen to the radio/podcasts, find ones that inspire & uplift you, rather than those that focus on bad news. If you watch TV, limit it to an hour or so & once again, watch something that's uplifting, not murders & awful news. Now is when you need that most.

Do a bit of yoga. You don't need special equipment, can find free vids online & it will really begin to relax you. You sound like a bundle of nerves right now.

Start reading inspirational quotes & find one to focus on each day.

Lastly, stop telling your story. You're focusing on only bad & need to get yourself stable, safe & secure. If that means therapy & job counseling, find that from the safety of home. The more you repeat your sad tale of A, B, C & D being wrong, the more you keep it alive. Channel all that energy into going home, finding a job & then working. The next goals can be saving money & moving out.

In 6-mos, you're life will be completely different & all this can be behind you.

Best of luck.
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