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Old 12-27-2016, 10:43 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 157,289 times
Reputation: 74

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First off, I apologize if this is the wrong area to post this, but this just seems to be the most fitting out of what's available.

Ok, so LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG story short (sorry it's still too long to be tl;dr) I left home, town hopped looking for work and going to where Facebook friends were because I didn't want to be where I knew no one because I don't have great social skills........................ and don't know how to get work on my own.

I ended up at other family in the state of California. Why did I leave home in the first place? Because I was physically stuck in a really rural area and can't handle driving so I (long story short) got a taxi out of there. A few towns later I was invited to come here (after my family here saw my Gofundme about me being robbed). Now my immediate family moved to civilization, and said I can move in. BUT, it is LITERALLY right behind my grandparents house (I mean so close my family even uses their wifi).

These next 2 paragraphs from another one of my threads fits here.

My mom is bipolar I think, OVERREACTS BAD FREAKING THE HECK OUT! And my family lives right behind my grandparents now, which is an area where jobs are physically available to me (it's in civilization) but my grandparents live right there and are often MONSTERS! At the old house when they visited my grandmother actually (behind my mom's back when she wasn't there) went and took my door's lock off and threatened to call the cops on me and tell them I assaulted her when I put my hand on my doorknob to prevent her from taking it off. (So no privacy pleasuring myself). If I was a parent I'd say you don't parent my kids, I do, don't come into my house and try to take control of my kids and my house! If I keep getting treated like that I am most likely going to hurt someone and go to prison (or just jail?) or hurt myself and die. Or I am going to go and try to rob money to get away immediately, and I will most likely just go to prison for attempting robbery. I can't deal with the controlling ****. And no a job won't be like that, no boss is going to try to take my phone or go to my house and take my door lock off. No job is going to make me do anything other than work that job. They're not going to make nonsense rules like I have to walk everyday, or I'm not allowed to go get food to eat even with my own money that I earned (my mom's parents have authority over her, even without living in the same house).

I'm scared that even if I apply to every place and even call back every day they still won't hire me, because nothing is guaranteed in life and I've had extremely odd bad luck in life, and even wonder if some evil supernatural forces are behind it or something like that. It's like everything in the world is locked away or COMPLETELY HIDDEN from me, yet other people have no problem getting into any of it. I wonder, are other forces at work here, or am I simply uneducated about everything in life (which I am)?

That bs just makes me feel worse, super triggers, and I breakdown and want to kill myself or something else drastic if I can't get online because my whole life is online, I have no friends in real life, I have become Internet dependent, and it's miserable in any ways like no physical contact with anyone, but it's the only life I have, I am nothing offline, I have no friends offline, I am just a nobody loser (like everyone in school my whole life said). But online, I have many friends, and they like me, I even had Internet girlfriends, I even had CYBER SEX with one, could see and hear but not touch As a virgin it's awful.

I've only made money online too, those survey sites, like $100 a month SOMETIMES.

So I lose EVERYTHING if I can't get online, I wish it wasn't that way but that's what happens when everyone in school bullied you and then you were physically way out in the rural lands for years. And then even if you escape into the real world, you have no idea what to do.

I've even thought I might as well go to prison, my life is going nowhere anyway. I've actually WANTED to get locked in a psychiatric hospital (which I have when I was 15) because at least I wouldn't be alone, and after 18 they even put males and females together. It's not like they're killer criminals in there, some of them really nice, I actually had good friends in there. I have to talk to people in MY HEAD when I can't get online for some reason. Whether it's taken away from me, or it's down to technical issues, when I lose Internet access I lose my LIFE. And sadly, my online life is the BEST LIFE I've ever had. I want better, I want a life in real life, but it's so hard t get, and apparently can take MONTHS OR EVEN YEARS. I already lack life skills, someone unemployed dates and gets laid and has friends and even go to parties? HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE? SINCE WHEN DO PEOPLE WANT ANYTHING TO DO WITH UNEMPLOYED PEOPLE WHO STILL LIVE AT HOME WITH THEIR PARENT(S) (WHO HAS 2 PARENTS?)

Advice I often get is, just keep applying for jobs, that's all you can do. I'm ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED of the fact that nothing in life is guaranteed, because that means I could be permanently unemployable, single, a virgin, friendless, a dependent no life loser. I don't know if everything is in my control or some greater unseen force is in control. Many people say it's all out of your control (many say it's all in God's control). Many say it's all in your control.

Everyone says different things, so it's impossible to know what's true, and I've been told I sound like I have this thing called Paralysis by Analysis? Which does sound correct, also according to a page I am an Internet addict, I matched literally almost everything on the page exactly!

I tried to get into the military and Peace Corps, but was unqualified for both. Military for relying on prescription medication, Peace Corps (I REALLY HAVE WANTED TO GO ABROAD TOO!) for not having a Bachelor's Degree or work experience.

I've been asked, why do you live where you live (wherever I am currently living) if you don't like it? Well, it's because I am poor and dependent.

I have a dysfunctional family, you could probably figure that out due to the mess I am.

I'm 21 with just a high school diploma (barely got it) and didn't realize that school was important until LITERALLY a week before graduation! I was going to go to community college right after, but at the time my dad lived with us, and he wouldn't allow me to go live on campus (someone had to pay for it, yes a community college had dorms) and I'd have no reliable transportation to commute. My mom wanted me to go but my dad was the boss of the house, (eventually after he started beating us and drinking more and more she divorced him).

I've suffered a lot in my dreams, they've started to have events from the day of the night I went to sleep. I've so many times woken up screaming out of terror or yelling threats that are often at the bullies or my dad. I always claim that I have no memory of it, but I almost always (but apparently do mumble in my sleep with no memory of it) remember these dreams and waking up. I've even woken up kicking from my dreams, kicking the nightstand in real life.

I have had a VERY COMMON VERY OFTEN dream theme. I have had this dream theme SO MANY TIMES. I will find myself back in school (not always the same physical school, but like I said it's always the same THEME). I will realize that I have already graduated but been put back in anyway, then I will make or attempt to make my escape. I would never want to go back to high school, it was a nightmare in real life!

I'm sick of not being able to live life, time is passing by, I'm getting older everyday, physically, but my knowledge isn't growing.

I have become EXTREMELY willing and impulsive, but living in a capitalist society (United States) everything has a financial barrier.

 
Old 12-27-2016, 11:18 PM
 
Location: California
37,035 posts, read 41,961,954 times
Reputation: 34834
I can't tell if you have a real mental illness or millenialitis. You have nothing and probably need to go home for awhile.
 
Old 12-27-2016, 11:25 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 157,289 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ceece View Post
I can't tell if you have a real mental illness or millenialitis. You have nothing and probably need to go home for awhile.
I'm desperate to get a life and seeing if options exist to start life IMMEDIATELY.
 
Old 12-27-2016, 11:44 PM
 
Location: The Triad
34,091 posts, read 82,455,924 times
Reputation: 43647
Quote:
Originally Posted by LifeSeeker21 View Post
I'm desperate to get a life and seeing if options exist to start life IMMEDIATELY.
options = useful JOB skills that will earn enough to pay the bills
AND which are actually needed where you want to be living

beyond that options = having enough CASH on hand to cover those bills
for the time it takes to get established in the job and set up a new home situation.

With good skills and the right job market a person could show up on a Monday and be earning by that Wednesday.
But they'll still need several THOUSAND to swing all the rest.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ceece View Post
I can't tell if you have a real mental illness or millenialitis.
You have nothing and probably need to go home for awhile.
^^ What she said.
 
Old 12-28-2016, 12:09 AM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
32,757 posts, read 35,962,679 times
Reputation: 43470
My husband joined the military. He had a job and a home... and food.

*My brother joined the Peace Corps. The other one tried to get into the Coast Guard, but no go.
 
Old 12-28-2016, 08:06 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 157,289 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gerania View Post
My husband joined the military. He had a job and a home... and food.

*My brother joined the Peace Corps. The other one tried to get into the Coast Guard, but no go.
I tried to get into the Peace Corps (I've had a GREAT DESIRE to go abroad) and was unqualified due to not having a bachelor's degree (someone even said getting into the Peace Corps is as hard as getting into Harvard) or work eperience. I talked to a military recruiter, he told me that I am not qualified due to having to take prescription medication (also a doctor told me before that I will probably have to take meds the rest of my life).

It seems my only option is get any job I can, then work, and work up. But, a job is not a right in America (we're not assigned jobs, which could be helpful, but I'm sure have it's pros AND cons just like EVERYTHING does). I guess if someone honestly doesn't WANT to work they should be allowed to be a homeless bum? But what about the people who DO want to work? It shouldn't be a great struggle for them to gain employment, I don't mean anyone should be able to just start being a doctor or a lawyer or something that requires high skills, I mean like stocking shelves, pushing grocery carts, sweeping floors, that kind of stuff, low skill entry level jobs.

I've actually withheld some information because it will DEFINITELY confuse people. I kind of DID get hired for 2 jobs, but due to problems with my roommate (this was when I still have savings) I had to leave (that's when I came to my family here in California). Unfortunately, she refused to give me my rent back, even though it hadn't even been ONE day since I gave it to her. I wish I knew she was bipolar, I could have just went straight here. I somehow managed to always be in the restaurant I walked to to use wifi (as she didn't have it) talking to her on Facebook every time she got in the bad mood, and I actually LIVED WITH HER, and I STILL WAS ABLE TO ONLY TALK TO HER ON FACEBOOK WHEN SHE WAS MAD! When I first got there she actually went on Facebook to find my parents to report on me, and when I told her I'm not a kid you talk TO ME not my parents, she went off of me saying I don't care if my family dies! WTF!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Since I didn't get to work one day at either job, I don't think I have really had employment, even though I was a paycheck for a training day.

My parents actually drove there (this was actually not too far from them) to drive me to the bus station to come here. My mom wanted me to go home (understandable) but my step dad said I am actually doing better away from home (because I am not physically stuck anymore and isolated from the outside world). My mom was glad that I would be with family though, which made her more willing to help me get here. See my uncle is her brother.

So I don't think I can say that I have a job before, because I didn't really get to work even Day 1, even if I was owed a paycheck for a training day.

What will I tell employers when/if they ask why I am 21 and have never worked? Well if I told them everything, first no employer wants to hear your life story, second they might think I am too unstable, might even think I will move again after a short amount of time. I was thinking maybe I can just tell them, I have been applying for numerous jobs and getting nothing, and just trying to figure out what to do with my life. They might not buy the stuck in a rural area story, or just might not care.

Some people have said to lie and say I have experience, and that they don't even check. Should I do this? I could say I've worked at a McDonald's and Walmart or something like that. It's not like other employers will find out if one finds out I lied right? If I am caught I'll just tell them the truth, that I thought lying and saying I have experience is the only way I could get my first job, so I could gain experience for real and not have to lie in the future. I doubt it, but maybe they'd even hire me after I told the truth after they caught me lying (they probably wouldn't though). I've also thought about finding random people online (I have friends online but most are far away which could be suspicious implying their pretending for me) to be my referrals, I could do that for someone. Pretend someone worked for me, because they have no real referrals.

Sometimes in life you have to lie, and this can allow you to be honest later on. It's not like it's doing something illegal like robbery or drug dealing.
 
Old 12-28-2016, 09:39 PM
 
Location: TOVCCA
8,452 posts, read 14,950,070 times
Reputation: 12528
Are you willing to have a career that is not a "straight" job? How about learning to read tarot cards? Lots of advantages for you in your situation.

Work online, on the phone, or in person; you can give readings in coffee shops, no office needed. You will be instantly interesting to people (including girls) that you meet, your health history doesn't matter, age unimportant, no degree necessary, no references needed, get experience as you go, and you can even offer to barter a reading for many services, meals, etc.

You can get the training through a correspondence course and reading books. Very inexpensive to do. Start here: The ATA Correspondence Course
 
Old 12-28-2016, 09:54 PM
 
Location: California
242 posts, read 157,289 times
Reputation: 74
Quote:
Originally Posted by nightlysparrow View Post
Are you willing to have a career that is not a "straight" job? How about learning to read tarot cards? Lots of advantages for you in your situation.

Work online, on the phone, or in person; you can give readings in coffee shops, no office needed. You will be instantly interesting to people (including girls) that you meet, your health history doesn't matter, age unimportant, no degree necessary, no references needed, get experience as you go, and you can even offer to barter a reading for many services, meals, etc.

You can get the training through a correspondence course and reading books. Very inexpensive to do. Start here: The ATA Correspondence Course
Sounds like you're messing with me.
 
Old 12-28-2016, 10:27 PM
 
Location: Mid-Atlantic
32,757 posts, read 35,962,679 times
Reputation: 43470
I'm not so sure about that. Nightlysparrow is a pretty straight shooter and has a good reputation around here.
 
Old 12-28-2016, 10:31 PM
 
Location: Des Moines Metro
5,103 posts, read 8,543,352 times
Reputation: 9793
Lifeseeker, you need more help in the real world than an internet forum can give you.

You need a counselor/social worker immediately, as in first thing in the morning.

Start with your local community mental health services. You can use Google to find the address or if that is too hard for you, go to the public library and get help from the librarian. Once you get the address, confirm they are open and go there tomorrow. Tell them the same thing that you have posted to this forum. If they can't help you, ask what other resources they might recommend.

If you don't have community mental health services nearby, contact the department of human services and explain that you are low income and need to find a job training program. You also need counseling. Again, tell the social worker the same things that you have posted to this forum.

If your home life were somewhat normal, I would strongly encourage you to go home, but in this case, I think you are better off seeking help in the real world right where you are. I suspect you might have ADHD or other type of social or learning disorder that needs professional intervention so that you can get your life on track.

You may also need to go live in a group home or other supervised situation for awhile to help you learn the necessary life skills that you need to succeed.

It's all up to you, now. Go seek out help in the real world. Don't take "no" for an answer. You can turn this situation around!
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