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Old 01-11-2017, 04:52 PM
 
Location: DFW
48 posts, read 30,507 times
Reputation: 39

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Meemur View Post
This ^^^^^

If he can't find somewhere else to stay, he has no choice. I wouldn't sweat the move too much. Focus on what's right for you.
Thank You
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Old 01-11-2017, 05:00 PM
 
Location: DFW
48 posts, read 30,507 times
Reputation: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by jerseyj View Post
If OP does live in Trenton, NJ, I understand her fear of leaving him there.
Most of Trenton is not safe anytime and really not safe for vulnerable young men.

Mom, one thing that hit me was how helpless you sound. Take the offer on the house (that is a HUGE accomplishment), you might never get another one.
Offer to move the GF with you, get your older son to speak with him.

Honestly, I would do just about anything to get him to move.
I worked in Trenton for 25 years.
Yes I live in Trenton, NJ thank you for understanding. He's not into the streets NEVER had any problems out of him. That's so true I'm thinking the offer is our blessings for our way out of here. We already let him know that the girlfriend can come with him. Our oldest son has spoken to him already, he keep saying he's not ready yet. My husband thinks it's his state job. Yes we're trying very hard, are you still in Trenton?
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Old 01-11-2017, 05:01 PM
 
Location: DFW
48 posts, read 30,507 times
Reputation: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ellwood View Post
One of my sons went to college in a city with a lot of crime. When I moved him in to his dorm, I thought "how will he survive." Well he survived, excelled, went to another big city for MS and joined the military and was deployed to Iraq several times. He survived, without us. He was 27 after his second deployment.
Congrats to your son may God continue to bless him
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Old 01-11-2017, 05:04 PM
 
1,366 posts, read 1,105,253 times
Reputation: 2164
Quote:
Originally Posted by jerseyj View Post
If OP does live in Trenton, NJ, I understand her fear of leaving him there.
Most of Trenton is not safe anytime and really not safe for vulnerable young men.

Mom, one thing that hit me was how helpless you sound. Take the offer on the house (that is a HUGE accomplishment), you might never get another one.
Offer to move the GF with you, get your older son to speak with him.

Honestly, I would do just about anything to get him to move.

I worked in Trenton for 25 years.
The 24-y/o needs to decide to move on his own. OP can't force him to move.
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Old 01-11-2017, 05:09 PM
 
Location: DFW
48 posts, read 30,507 times
Reputation: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by earslikeacat View Post
Move. He can join you after he swims, or sinks.
But a 24 year old needs to begin to get beginning. Molly-coddling a 24 year old male will backfire.
We're praying he comes with us. Not molly-coddling at all. His dad is a quadriplegic, so he's a big help to us.
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Old 01-11-2017, 05:11 PM
 
Location: DFW
48 posts, read 30,507 times
Reputation: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovely40 View Post
The 24-y/o needs to decide to move on his own. OP can't force him to move.
You're right, we can't force him. I'm praying that he comes with us, he can't trust nobody here!!!
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Old 01-11-2017, 05:14 PM
 
Location: DFW
48 posts, read 30,507 times
Reputation: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by finalmove View Post
He's 24 and still living at home? What's wrong with him? When I was 19, I couldn't wait to leave home and begin my own life.
OP you need to give him a date certain, and move with or without him. Quit coddling him.
Yes he's 24 and lives at home, there's nothing wrong with him. I'm a quadriplegic, and he's a big help to my wife and I. I'm definitely not coddling him. He's a very responsible, respectful young man and he works 2 jobs and going to class to get his CDL'S.
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Old 01-11-2017, 05:53 PM
 
Location: DFW
48 posts, read 30,507 times
Reputation: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by carnivalday View Post
24 years old?? Do you still change his diapers too?

How long do you plan on revolving your life on your special snowflake? Until he's 25? 30? 40?

Hes not your baby. He's your grown son. dont you want him to act that way?
Yes 24 years old, no because he don't wear diapers. My son's will ALWAYS be my babies no matter how old they are. He helps out alot at home, his dad is a quadriplegic!!!
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Old 01-11-2017, 06:26 PM
 
Location: New Orleans, LA
1,727 posts, read 3,129,051 times
Reputation: 2938
Quote:
Originally Posted by sliqnes View Post
Yes he's 24 and lives at home, there's nothing wrong with him. I'm a quadriplegic, and he's a big help to my wife and I. I'm definitely not coddling him. He's a very responsible, respectful young man and he works 2 jobs and going to class to get his CDL'S.
He sounds like a good boy who has become a good, responsible man, and congratulations on raising him like that.


Maybe you will need to hire someone at your new location to help you with whatever your son is doing for you now.
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Old 01-11-2017, 06:40 PM
 
Location: DFW
48 posts, read 30,507 times
Reputation: 39
Quote:
Originally Posted by NOLA2SGF View Post
He sounds like a good boy who has become a good, responsible man, and congratulations on raising him like that.


Maybe you will need to hire someone at your new location to help you with whatever your son is doing for you now.
Yes he is, we're very proud of him. Thank you, hopefully he'll come with us. We'll have my oldest son to help also
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