Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > General Moving Issues
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 11-05-2018, 06:45 PM
 
Location: exit 0
5,287 posts, read 4,349,273 times
Reputation: 7019

Advertisements

It's time for this sticky since there have been a great deal of threads that are not what one would call "on topic."

What kind of weather do you prefer? Did you move to be near family? How did you decide where to move? These are just a few examples that do not follow the guidelines for which this forum was established. These types of posts DO belong in this thread.

Be aware, this thread is for chat about moving. It's not about retirement, politics, or any other topic for which there is an existing forum.

Please see this thread for posting guidelines to start threads in this forum.

As always, please report any post or thread that does not conform to this thread. this forum or that violates. the Terms of Service of this site.
__________________
"Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country." ~JFK
Terms of Service
Copyright Info
Frequently Asked Questions
Do NOT reply to moderator posts that are in RED.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 12-01-2018, 10:00 PM
 
16 posts, read 24,660 times
Reputation: 56
Unhappy Disappointed That Move To NYC Didn't Work Out

I moved to NYC from Portland OR at the beginning of the 2018. I had been living in Portland since I was 20 (now 25) and last year I made a decision to go back to school. I thought it made sense to take the opportunity to attend school in a new city. I applied to a number of different schools, and got accepted to one in Brooklyn. So I packed up my stuff and moved all the way across the country.

Initially the move seemed easier than expected. I found an apartment and a job fairly quickly. I found a friend group that I felt a part of. I figured out the city and public transit somewhat easily. I really enjoyed the first couple months I was here. I explored a lot, ate new food, went to shows and museums. But as time went on and the initial thrill of being in a new city faded I started to wonder how much I actually like NYC.

I've always had a somewhat difficult time managing my stress levels and after a while of living here I started feeling super stressed out all the time. The shoulder to shoulder subway commutes to school in the morning, the constant noise, the lack of general accessibility to healthy food and nature all started getting to me. Being surrounded by so many people all the time just started to make me kinda angry (or disgruntled I guess).

Even more so a lot of my friends around my age out here seem to share the feeling of being "isolated". Which doesn't really make sense in a city of 8 million people. But people don't really seem to "hang out" here. It's such a work driven city. Everyone is always busy. No one really uses their living rooms at most of the apartments that I've been to. I've just fallen into the habit, that so many of the people I know seem to be in, of going to work/school and then just going home to your tiny bedroom. I'd go walk around Chinatown on my day off or go out to eat with friends one night a week, but for the most part my existence has become pretty solitary.

After being here for almost a year I've decided to move back to Portland at the end of this semester. I can't help but be pretty disappointed that things didn't work out how I wanted them to. I guess I had different expectations of how my life here would be, and part of me thinks that I am giving up to easily. I just don't see the point in sticking it out any longer when I've been pretty miserable for the past 6 months.

I guess NYC just isn't the place for me. Have any of you had disappointing experiences with a move like this? And if so, what did you do and how did you make yourself feel better about all of it?

Kind of just venting because I've been pretty bummed about the whole situation and don't know who to talk to but any input is appreciated!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-01-2018, 11:21 PM
 
Location: Henderson, NV
7,087 posts, read 8,585,304 times
Reputation: 9978
Well NYC is a pretty crazy city, but I live in Portland and I hate this pile of garbage city. To me nothing is worse than Portland and it’s horrible traffic, high cost of living, sky high taxes, bad weather, miserable people, and sleepy culture that goes to bed at 9 every night. New York doesn’t sound any better though, too crowded and expensive and too small of living quarters by far.

I moved to LA for film and I enjoyed what I learned, had to be there, but I eventually realized it wasn’t for me too. You just have to find the city that’s a good fit for you and there are tons of them out there. No reason to live somewhere you hate.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-02-2018, 01:14 AM
 
Location: Appalachian New York, Formerly Louisiana
4,409 posts, read 6,485,051 times
Reputation: 6253
Everything you described is exactly why New Yorkers are so grouchy. They really never have any fun.

Of course by New Yorkers I mean NYC folk. Here upstate things are a lot more relaxed and beautiful, depending on what community you move to.

Have you considered perhaps coming upstate? A smaller city like Ithaca or Corning could suit you. Both are surrounded by the Appalachians (Ithaca has Cayuga lake as well) and have a lot more breathing room. Seems like a more affordable move anyhow.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-02-2018, 11:28 AM
 
Location: Western MA
2,556 posts, read 2,260,744 times
Reputation: 6881
I lived in Manhattan NYC for many years and loved it. I went out a lot, had many friends and had a lot of great experiences. I then made the mistake of buying a co-op apartment in Queens (Kew Gardens) and hated it. I spent 4 miserable years there until I moved to New Hampshire.

But I hear you about the stress of living in NYC. The constant noise and pressure of crowds does get to you after a while and I can understand how it would not be for a lot of people. My favorite neighborhood that I lived in was the Upper West Side (West 78th Street, between Broadway & Amsterdam Ave). While in a very busy part of the city, in a way, it also felt like my home town. I would see the same people around, knew all the shop owners and clerks, I was close to the park. But even living there, when I was done, I was DONE.

These days, if I hear a car alarm, or a pounding stereo bass, my heart starts pounding with a panicked flashback of noise that is going to start and not stop. That is a leftover from having lived in NYC for so long (over 20 years).

I give you credit for giving it a try though, so now you don't have to wonder about "what ifs"! One thing about living in NYC is that you get a chance to meet and get to know people from all walks of life. I hope that you were able to at least have that experience.

Good luck in Portland!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-02-2018, 11:35 AM
 
Location: 89052 & 75206
8,097 posts, read 8,227,474 times
Reputation: 19885
I think you should join a gym and get regular exercise 3x a week and extend your stay at least another semester.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-02-2018, 11:43 AM
 
1,660 posts, read 1,197,460 times
Reputation: 2890
NYC city is great if you have money. you can party with friends on your rooftop patio in you luxury condo or private garden of your upper east side townhouse.. watch broadway shows once a week in the first row. have season tickets ot the knicks and sit next to Spike Lee. hit up the VIP lounges and get bottle service. Zip around the hamptons in your porsche 911 on the weekends.

for everyone else its just a 5-7 day workweek 9+ hours a day grind to try to make as much money as possible and spend as little as possible.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-02-2018, 01:39 PM
 
5,724 posts, read 7,443,967 times
Reputation: 4518
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1000flowersbloom View Post
I moved to NYC from Portland OR at the beginning of the 2018. I had been living in Portland since I was 20 (now 25) and last year I made a decision to go back to school. I thought it made sense to take the opportunity to attend school in a new city. I applied to a number of different schools, and got accepted to one in Brooklyn. So I packed up my stuff and moved all the way across the country.

Initially the move seemed easier than expected. I found an apartment and a job fairly quickly. I found a friend group that I felt a part of. I figured out the city and public transit somewhat easily. I really enjoyed the first couple months I was here. I explored a lot, ate new food, went to shows and museums. But as time went on and the initial thrill of being in a new city faded I started to wonder how much I actually like NYC.

I've always had a somewhat difficult time managing my stress levels and after a while of living here I started feeling super stressed out all the time. The shoulder to shoulder subway commutes to school in the morning, the constant noise, the lack of general accessibility to healthy food and nature all started getting to me. Being surrounded by so many people all the time just started to make me kinda angry (or disgruntled I guess).

Even more so a lot of my friends around my age out here seem to share the feeling of being "isolated". Which doesn't really make sense in a city of 8 million people. But people don't really seem to "hang out" here. It's such a work driven city. Everyone is always busy. No one really uses their living rooms at most of the apartments that I've been to. I've just fallen into the habit, that so many of the people I know seem to be in, of going to work/school and then just going home to your tiny bedroom. I'd go walk around Chinatown on my day off or go out to eat with friends one night a week, but for the most part my existence has become pretty solitary.

After being here for almost a year I've decided to move back to Portland at the end of this semester. I can't help but be pretty disappointed that things didn't work out how I wanted them to. I guess I had different expectations of how my life here would be, and part of me thinks that I am giving up to easily. I just don't see the point in sticking it out any longer when I've been pretty miserable for the past 6 months.

I guess NYC just isn't the place for me. Have any of you had disappointing experiences with a move like this? And if so, what did you do and how did you make yourself feel better about all of it?

Kind of just venting because I've been pretty bummed about the whole situation and don't know who to talk to but any input is appreciated!
It is okay. It is all apart of the journey. You tried it on and it does not fit.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-02-2018, 01:41 PM
 
10,075 posts, read 7,469,576 times
Reputation: 15498
you didn't spend enough money :/... that's how large cities work, spend money on the high COL and be happy
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 12-02-2018, 02:44 PM
 
Location: Bay Area
1,840 posts, read 1,465,197 times
Reputation: 1025
Quote:
Originally Posted by 1000flowersbloom View Post
I moved to NYC from Portland OR at the beginning of the 2018. I had been living in Portland since I was 20 (now 25) and last year I made a decision to go back to school. I thought it made sense to take the opportunity to attend school in a new city. I applied to a number of different schools, and got accepted to one in Brooklyn. So I packed up my stuff and moved all the way across the country.

Initially the move seemed easier than expected. I found an apartment and a job fairly quickly. I found a friend group that I felt a part of. I figured out the city and public transit somewhat easily. I really enjoyed the first couple months I was here. I explored a lot, ate new food, went to shows and museums. But as time went on and the initial thrill of being in a new city faded I started to wonder how much I actually like NYC.

I've always had a somewhat difficult time managing my stress levels and after a while of living here I started feeling super stressed out all the time. The shoulder to shoulder subway commutes to school in the morning, the constant noise, the lack of general accessibility to healthy food and nature all started getting to me. Being surrounded by so many people all the time just started to make me kinda angry (or disgruntled I guess).

Even more so a lot of my friends around my age out here seem to share the feeling of being "isolated". Which doesn't really make sense in a city of 8 million people. But people don't really seem to "hang out" here. It's such a work driven city. Everyone is always busy. No one really uses their living rooms at most of the apartments that I've been to. I've just fallen into the habit, that so many of the people I know seem to be in, of going to work/school and then just going home to your tiny bedroom. I'd go walk around Chinatown on my day off or go out to eat with friends one night a week, but for the most part my existence has become pretty solitary.

After being here for almost a year I've decided to move back to Portland at the end of this semester. I can't help but be pretty disappointed that things didn't work out how I wanted them to. I guess I had different expectations of how my life here would be, and part of me thinks that I am giving up to easily. I just don't see the point in sticking it out any longer when I've been pretty miserable for the past 6 months.

I guess NYC just isn't the place for me. Have any of you had disappointing experiences with a move like this? And if so, what did you do and how did you make yourself feel better about all of it?

Kind of just venting because I've been pretty bummed about the whole situation and don't know who to talk to but any input is appreciated!
That's disappointing. I thought NYC would be the best city ever! I am not a city person and I live in an NYC suburb in North Jersey. If I lived in a city, no matter what city it is, I'd hate, because I am not a city person! I am not interested in public transportation, fighting over resources, and crowding. Many people think because they are young, they have to move to a city. I feel like I am the only young person who has NO desire to live in a city. My dream was to live in a semi-rural area. In fact, I had Oregon on my mind as a choice. Besides, why move out of Oregon to NYC? NYC is a great city from my imagination, but Oregon has better climate. better scenery, and less crowded.

I am shocked NYC would lack healthy food, but I am pretty sure the PNW had more healthy food options considering the lifestyle out there.

Everyone in NYC is super busy, because they are busy working too hard to afford an unaffordable place and their unaffordable fancy cars (too many fancy cars in North Jersey and NYC). Also, the East Coast sucks, because it is a very work oriented place. People do not live a fun lifestyle on the East Coast. People just work, live a ho-hum lifestyle, shop at Costco on the weekends, and get fat. West Coast is the better coast where you can actually have a life. East Coast is more "you live to work", while the West Coast is more "you work to live".
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > General Moving Issues

All times are GMT -6.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top