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Old 01-17-2019, 08:59 PM
 
84 posts, read 45,718 times
Reputation: 245

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I’ve lived all over the world on several continents, for work, school and curiosity.

Most places, I’m able to adapt to within a couple of months. Most recently, for example, Los Angeles. I still adore that city, and miss the energy, pace, vibe, diversity of lifestyles, and general “don’t give a damn” attitude. I don’t miss the toxic management at work, but my coworkers were beyond amazing and engaging. I don’t miss California’s liberal politics, but life shouldn’t be, and is never, all about politics anyway. I had a great life there overall and knew I’d miss aspects of it when I moved.

Well, by contrast, I’ve just moved from L.A. to Houston. For all the talk of Southern hospitality, I find the women far less approachable and more b**chy, the coworkers far less social (polite but distant), the people in Meetup groups less engaging, and the Texas collective-cultural mindset one of strange braggadocio. Not to mention, the city isn’t particularly attractive, downtown is dead after 6pm, and even the park system here is rather grungy and poorly maintained. The nearby Gulf coastal areas are some of the truly ugliest coastal-front areas I’ve seen anywhere on the planet.

I don’t want to write Houston, and Texas, off just yet, as I’m still relatively new here, but my patience is also waning rather quickly.

How long do you give a new city before deciding whether you like it or want to bail?

 
Old 01-18-2019, 05:19 AM
 
Location: North Dakota
7,721 posts, read 9,015,236 times
Reputation: 11078
Quote:
Originally Posted by AmericaBravoCharles View Post
Iíve lived all over the world on several continents, for work, school and curiosity.

Most places, Iím able to adapt to within a couple of months. Most recently, for example, Los Angeles. I still adore that city, and miss the energy, pace, vibe, diversity of lifestyles, and general ďdonít give a damnĒ attitude. I donít miss the toxic management at work, but my coworkers were beyond amazing and engaging. I donít miss Californiaís liberal politics, but life shouldnít be, and is never, all about politics anyway. I had a great life there overall and knew Iíd miss aspects of it when I moved.

Well, by contrast, Iíve just moved from L.A. to Houston. For all the talk of Southern hospitality, I find the women far less approachable and more b**chy, the coworkers far less social (polite but distant), the people in Meetup groups less engaging, and the Texas collective-cultural mindset one of strange braggadocio. Not to mention, the city isnít particularly attractive, downtown is dead after 6pm, and even the park system here is rather grungy and poorly maintained. The nearby Gulf coastal areas are some of the truly ugliest coastal-front areas Iíve seen anywhere on the planet.

I donít want to write Houston, and Texas, off just yet, as Iím still relatively new here, but my patience is also waning rather quickly.

How long do you give a new city before deciding whether you like it or want to bail?
It takes years to make friends in a city. As far as scenery, that shouldn't determine anything I think.
 
Old 01-18-2019, 05:23 AM
 
84 posts, read 45,718 times
Reputation: 245
Quote:
Originally Posted by NDak15 View Post
It takes years to make friends in a city. As far as scenery, that shouldn't determine anything I think.
I made friends in some of my previous cities in months or even weeks, not years.

Iíve lived in places with amazing scenery, tooóand, yes, it always helps.
 
Old 01-18-2019, 06:25 AM
 
Location: The Triad (NC)
28,484 posts, read 62,084,629 times
Reputation: 32136
Quote:
Originally Posted by AmericaBravoCharles View Post
Iíve just moved from L.A. to Houston.
Start packing. When it gets hot it'll only be worse.
 
Old 01-18-2019, 07:32 AM
 
Location: Oklahoma City, OK
4,422 posts, read 4,287,609 times
Reputation: 5214
It does take years to make friends. I've lived in Oklahoma City 6 long, miserable years now. Its so not me culturally, and yet I'm kind of stuck because I'm in a senior level position. You don't just quit these types of positions and randomly move elsewhere. Its hard to get another job at this level, so I'm literally stuck here.
 
Old 01-18-2019, 07:33 AM
 
Location: rural south west UK
3,563 posts, read 2,055,800 times
Reputation: 4018
about 5 minutes!!
 
Old 01-18-2019, 08:00 AM
 
Location: Los Angeles
12,159 posts, read 10,333,551 times
Reputation: 33138
6 months but maybe up to a year to see the city at all points of the year.
 
Old 01-18-2019, 08:05 AM
 
Location: East of the Mississippi and South of Bluegrass
4,453 posts, read 3,750,975 times
Reputation: 9592
Quote:
Originally Posted by bigpaul View Post
about 5 minutes!!
If only it were that easy bigpaul!

I'm more than ready...and so glad I didn't unpack everything!
 
Old 01-18-2019, 08:35 AM
 
612 posts, read 712,146 times
Reputation: 965
I think, especially when you've moved before, you kind of know pretty quickly if it's going to work out or not. Our first big move, it took us 6 months to start to acclimate. After doing it 2 more times, we have figured things out in a few weeks. If you are already feeling that way, it may just be that it isn't the right fit. Nothing wrong with that at all, but now it's up to you to decide if you try to stick it out or if you want to start figuring out where you'd like to go next. Life's too short anyway - no need to be somewhere you don't want to be.
 
Old 01-18-2019, 09:32 AM
 
Location: Texas
76 posts, read 58,099 times
Reputation: 41
Quote:
Originally Posted by AmericaBravoCharles View Post
I’ve lived all over the world on several continents, for work, school and curiosity.

Most places, I’m able to adapt to within a couple of months.
Well, by contrast, I’ve just moved from L.A. to Houston. For all the talk of Southern hospitality, I find the women far less approachable and more b**chy, the coworkers far less social (polite but distant), the people in Meetup groups less engaging, and the Texas collective-cultural mindset one of strange braggadocio. Not to mention, the city isn’t particularly attractive, downtown is dead after 6pm, and even the park system here is rather grungy and poorly maintained. The nearby Gulf coastal areas are some of the truly ugliest coastal-front areas I’ve seen anywhere on the planet.

I don’t want to write Houston, and Texas, off just yet, as I’m still relatively new here, but my patience is also waning rather quickly.

How long do you give a new city before deciding whether you like it or want to bail?
I've moved MANY times in my life (Average 2 or 3 years between) and I try to give places a year or so to really know what its like. I gotta say when we visited Houston 10 years ago it was way friendlier. It's a lot of transplants that are changing the overall vibe. We fit with classic Texan conservatism, but many are fleeing the states where liberalism is now costing everyone and its more expensive to live there.

That said, the vibe of Austin to me seemed a bit more cultural and family oriented, but its all in what you like to do for fun. I'd suggest staying at least a year, really get out and explore, meet people however you can while ranging out for weekend trips to Austin, Dallas, Waco, maybe Corpus Christi or Galveston and see if any "resonate" more with you. Nothing says we have to stay anywhere forever..we are having tons of fun just exploring for now.
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