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I would move if you want to. that is what planes, trains and automobiles are for. telephones and emails. a relationship with either family or friends should be a give and tae and a 2 way street. sometimes people would prefer you stay where you are because it is easier for them and their life. the objections are selfish. yes it is sad when your loved ones are not close at hand but being far away does not rule out closeness
"I've been everywhere man....Oh I've been everywhere man!" at 18 growing up in New England, I loved the mountains the streams, ocean and Boston! But....I always had my eyes on the "what am I missing" factor....So I went out west.
Found myself in Dallas/Ft. Worth for over 15 years. I loved and hated it both. The economy was thriving while I was there, the cost of living was excellent, lots to do, but the weather and my allergies kept me inside under air conditioning all summer long. I missed being outdoors and having real seasonal changes.
To afford my moves from Dallas, to Michigan, to Illinois, and back home to New Hampshire, I sold my car, had garage sales for weekends and weekends, and cashed out some of my IRA to finally come full circle back home where I started.
It helped to be married and have extra opinions and stuff to sell....but it wasn't impossible. I even moved when I was single from Dallas to Little Rock "next door."
Start by picking the place you want to be. Go on their "travel Texas or Colorado" websites and request their free travel guides. Put their maps on your walls, then begin a check list of the things you'll need. I went straight to the NH forum of City-Data and began introducing myself there and sharing my dreams of coming back home to settle down. Everyone had great suggestions and areas, pumping me up and getting me very excited to move!
I met with my aggressive family members about leaving great jobs and security to live elsewhere too. Just brace yourself. You'll find quickly enough if your dream to travel as a gypsy in the world holds enough passion to take you there, those negative ninny's begin to drown out in the background as you take center stage in your own life.
Your own life. Do with it as you must....regret and asking yourself "what if" will catch up to you later when you're not looking. If your heart is set on moving, you'll be there in no time.
How do you deal with disapproval of family and friends, regarding your desire to move??????? Don't discuss it with them, or discontinue discussing with them. You'll get 100 million reasons why you should go, why you shouldn't go, at what time of the year you should go, go after you've saved X amount of dollars..get a job first..get an apt first..visit first..ARGH...$$@^&%_)((*... get my point. Lol.
Muscogee, I take it you have been through alot of disapproval for wanting to move...your advice is so helpful because I have decided to stop discussing my potential moves with family and friends cause they tell me i shouldnt go where I dont have any family especially with the way the economy is and that I wont make it. I am still in the process of saving and I get discouraged sometimes because I feel like I will never save enough to move, but I will keep on truckin'.
btw, Kat...your above post was OUTSTANDING! thanks
Muscogee, I take it you have been through alot of disapproval for wanting to move...your advice is so helpful because I have decided to stop discussing my potential moves with family and friends cause they tell me i shouldnt go where I dont have any family especially with the way the economy is and that I wont make it. I am still in the process of saving and I get discouraged sometimes because I feel like I will never save enough to move, but I will keep on truckin'.
btw, Kat...your above post was OUTSTANDING! thanks
LOL Introspective. Not only me, but my sister as well. Thing is, most disapproval comes from people, who haven't lived anywhere else, but the place they currently live or grew up in. Me and sis, were born and raised in larger metropolitan areas, and family members that haven't experienced that, just can't fathom doing such a thing, bad economy or not. We all know the current state of the economy, but, some sectors and some sectors in certain states, haven't been too greatly impacted.s Don't get me wrong, it's always good to have a cushion of $$$$$$ but, you gotta do, what you gotta do. Please do your research about the place you are considering though. Think cost of living, and what type of work will you be looking for. Hey, the way I see it, if folks from out of this country coming in by planes, and those, on foot from across the border can, move, get a job, and a place to live, ...come on, all the more motivation for you, and you are already here, (U.S.)
It sometimes depends on what motivational factors are at play. Family with children rooted in school, or being rooted in a comfy mortgage will think of themselves uprooting and moving in a negative way sometimes. Roots Roots Roots!
I have zero children, and a zero mortgage, all the more freedom to experiment in this changing world to uproot myself.
Just remember you can't run away from yourself. You (whom started this thread) already have in hand what I was running away from. Your degree. Since I've returned home, the 10+ years I've regretted not finishing my college education has finally come to an end. I start classes Tuesday.
Sometimes when you get stuck out in the big wide world, get confused, you gotta trail on back home to where it all began to see the bigger picture of yourself and the direction you started from.
Everyone has different reasons and factors that play for them. Relocating for a job, moving closer to an ill family member, just wanting to grow a better garden that isn't so rocky....to just wanting a new view.
Taking the first steps towards your new direction is as easy as that. Take the step. The rest becomes your history!
There is always going to be that one person who disapproves. The question then is...do i live for me, or do i live for what others expect of me. I must say do what YOU feel. If you move or dont move because of others....you are never going to be "settled".
When i made my last move, i had some trying to get me to come back to my home state where i grew up and lived for years. I couldnt do it. I continued with my move and i must say i couldnt be happier and feel at peace with it.
This thread has helped me so much! I am going through this same situation.. I got a lot of disapproval, negativity, persuading, etc.. when I chose to move across the state for college. I moved back here temporarily because I wasn't prepared financially (I've supported myself since graduating high school) and was unsure of my career path. I'm now approaching my anticipated move in a different way... I'll be planning and saving and eventually telling them but much closer to the actual day and after things have been finalized. I'm young, free, and deserving of my own happiness! Moving across the country will be a huge risk but I know it's one worth taking
Thank you to everyone who posted here.. your support and advice is very encouraging
What do you imagine moving will bring to your life?
The grass always looks greener on the other side.
AND maybe it is. BUT, the 1st thing to do is to make sure that your feet are on the ground. That means, staying focused, saving money, and visiting these places before you move to see if you like them. And not getting into debt by breaking a lease agreement.
If you think a new location is the answer, ask yourself what will that bring? And then accomplish it where you are, right now. When you can do that, you'll have a better sense of what you like and where you want to be.
Living in different places is like trying on different clothes or personas. You won't know how you like it until you try it. Every place has advantages and disadvantages--just like relationships.
Bottom line is--what can you live with when it's bad? And does the good make up for the bad?
As for family, expect that they will tell you what would be true for them. Plan, save, focus, then follow your heart. Carpe Diem.
sometimes people discourage you because they themselves are scared of doing it. So really think it through as much as possible and then go with it. If it doesn't work out and you have to go back, at least you've tried and there's no shame in that!
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get my point. Lol.
