Boring city but nice house or exciting city and rent? (college, move back)

[DawnW]

You decided in just the past 2 weeks! Wow!

I guess I misunderstood. Your OP seemed to indicate that you loved DC and didn't really want to leave.

Hope it works out for you.

Dawn

Originally Posted by doglover29

I hear you on that, but at the same time, for us it's equally important to love the house we're in. And there haven't been any houses in our price range that we've seen (online or in person) that we even remotely like. We don't want a fixer upper either. We want a house we love. That is more important to us than location. So that's why we decided to leave DC. It was a really hard decision, though. We debated this for months.

[5chevin5]

Originally Posted by doglover29

I think we've made a decision--after a lot of soul-searching, we've decided to not buy a house here in DC and to leave the area. We're considering cheaper cities on the East Coast (like Hartford and Richmond, VA) as well as the Midwest. Minneapolis, Milwaukee, Indy and Cleveland are at the top of our lists.

We just realized that paying $700 K for a crapshack here in DC that's in an area that's a decent commute for my hubby is just not worth it. We don't want to pay that kind of money for a house that's old, small and needs major work. We've been going to open houses, searching online, and seeing properties on our own by contacting listing agents, and these are the kinds of houses we've been seeing. So now we just have to decide where we're going to move, and when. We don't mind renting for a few more years and staying here in DC in order to make a better decision, but we could also move at any time, since we're renters.

Sounds like a wise choice.
An investment in a 700,000 dollar crapshack that you dont love....uff tough one to swallow after some time.

Take your time as you mentioned you can, do some good research and you may be surprised to find a hidden gem of a city that is affordable and has a high percentage of those extra things that you enjoy about life.
Like I said before, dont discount the West, its pretty cool out there.

I wish you happiness and luck in finding a home for you and hubby!
Gambate!
5

[doglover29]

Originally Posted by DawnW

You decided in just the past 2 weeks! Wow!

I guess I misunderstood. Your OP seemed to indicate that you loved DC and didn't really want to leave.

Hope it works out for you.

Dawn

We do love DC and don't want to leave, that's why this decision has been so difficult. But we finally decided that we would value a house we really loved in a less ideal location over living in a less than ideal house but in the city we love.

A question I have for others, in general, is: do most people live in houses that they don't really like/settle for, perhaps because the location is ideal (like in a nice suburb close to the city)?

[goodgirl49]

Originally Posted by cpg35223

I've lived a lot of places, large towns and small. I'm a museum and culture junkie, too. I've found there are no such things as boring cities...only boring people who do not have the initiative to find interesting things to do.

I agree with you totally. A lot of people lack initiative and don't want to seek out things to do. I feel my family has paid a price to live in a house which is a little too small, because my husband wouldn't consider leaving the Los Angeles area. There are probably a lot of places I could have seen myself living happily in.

[Cruikshl]

Originally Posted by doglover29

We do love DC and don't want to leave, that's why this decision has been so difficult. But we finally decided that we would value a house we really loved in a less ideal location over living in a less than ideal house but in the city we love.

A question I have for others, in general, is: do most people live in houses that they don't really like/settle for, perhaps because the location is ideal (like in a nice suburb close to the city)?

Oh this is a subject close to our hearts right now. We got transferred from right outside Atlanta where we had the house I would of spent the rest of my days in on a lake in the middle of shopping heaven. Coming to Connecticut it was impossible to find the style or finish we had in the Georgia. They had no golf course community let alone normal neighborhoods. We found a house farther out than we would of liked but the best house for the money. It is beautiful but.............we hate living where there is nothing to do. Most here love trees all around them. I prefer a view. We should of never bought where we did. In this market that is a mistake we may be stuck with.

[findingmesomeday]

I would have been completely surprised if the first house I purchased (20 years ago) was the one where I was still living today. Times change. Your needs change.

[#Littledog]

I agree with previous posts; I think the American dream of owning a home has softened. In fact, Dave Ramsey, a financial counselor (he has his own website) think that it's a myth you're just "throwing your money away" if you don't own a home. Don't move into a house you can't afford (think of all the foreclosures) and nowadays, owning a home isn't the investment it used to be. That can change, but I think it's going to be a few years. If you truly want to live in a house and there is nothing you can afford in D.C., then I guess I could consider moving if owning a home is a priority right now. Have you considered Milwaukee, WI? I know on paper it sounds boring and I know it's not as exciting as D.C. but it has affordable housing (although property taxes are high) but there are lots of things to do for a city it's size. It's close to Chicago and not too far from Minneapolis. I lived 45 minutes from Indy at one time in my life and I agree, it's not that fun of a city. Milwaukee has a lot more going on. The only thing I don't like about it is the cold weather but you said you don't mind the cold. Go to Milwaukee.com and you can get a feel for what's going on in the city. Milwaukee has a world-renowned art museum that is worth checking out. Like I said, it will never be like D.C. but as another poster mentioned, if you do decide to have kids, you won't be able to do all those things anyways (trust me, my husband and I were on the run all the time before kids and I swore our lives would not change after we had kids-LOL)...we're still on the run but it's more kid-centered:going to the zoo, the Children's Museum, driving them to school activities. We do make it out once in a while for adult activities when we manage to get a babysitter but it's not often. I know it's hard to make all these decisions about career, house, where to live, kids and I wish you the best of luck!

[Twinkle Toes]

Originally Posted by doglover29

My husband and I (early 30's, no kids) live in DC and are considering moving to a city with a lower cost of living, in order to buy a decent house. Here in DC, we cannot afford a decent house with a relatively short commute to the city for work. The houses we've been looking at that are small crap shacks are around $900,000. Thus, we are strongly looking at moving out of the area to the midwest, cities like Indianapolis, Cleveland, etc.

However, we are big city folk and love everything that DC has to offer--museums, cultural events, great nightlife, etc. We have lived in other big cities and really love the big city atmosphere, plus after living in a place like DC with so much to do it's hard to then move to a city where there's not much to do. We think we would miss the big city excitement in a place like Indy. Also, we love living on the East Coast because we are so close to great places for weekend trips within easy driving distance, like NYC, Philly, the Atlantic beaches, the Poconos, etc. If we lived in Indy or another midwest city, there's not that much around there to drive to that's very exciting.

We just can't decide if a nice house that's a decent price is worth being in a boring city. Or, should we stay and continue renting in order to be in an exciting city like DC? We've always rented and are ready to settle down and buy a house. On the other hand, we love going out and experiencing all the city has to offer.

We don't have any ties to anywhere and can move anywhere, so that makes this decision harder.

I've had the fabulous house for a cheap price in a boring place and couldnt wait to get the hell outta there. You have to do what makes you happy. For me, I discovered that my old friends and being in a 'happening' place were more important to me than a nice house. Not that I came from a bad house to begin with. I stayed in the boring place for 9 months and mnoved back to where I came from and now appreciate what I have so much more than I ever did.

[cobolt]

The OP says she and her husband are not homebodies and they love all the cultural offerings of DC, yet the focus really seems to be on a house that you won't spend much time in, don't really have the time to maintain, and don't really have the family to warrant 3-4 bedrooms. It just seems to me like you are wanting this perfect house when your life doesn't really fit in that mold right now. Sure it's great to plan, but there is such a thing as planning to the point that you stagnate or make a decison just to make one, not because it's the right one. As you say, you are in transition, and usually transitions should focus more on exploring for some sort of happy medium instead of trying to fit a certain mold. Look at it as buying all the baby clothes, china, furnishings for the big house and/or family you plan for but don't have right now. It's sort of putting the cart before the horse.

I understand all about the crackerbox house thing. Beleive me, I live in the Seattle area and it's pretty obnoxious on the housing front. There are a couple of things to keep in mind though:

Those areas that expereinced the greatest amount of property value increase over the years (mainly the coasts: I know we were averaging 18-20% value increases yearly) are now suffering the most. It makes sense that houses in more slower growth markets: the Midwest, areas of the South, will be more stable during this housing market fallout, so you are seeing some of that. Plus, you'll notice that the Midwest has a higher percentage of people living in those areas for generations whereas the coasts and some areas of the South are more transient areas: higher numbers of newer housing, greater influx of people, boom and bust sort of thing.

That being said though, I never understood why people think that paying rent is "throwing money away." THrowing money away means you get nothing in return for your monetary exchange. Rent pays for a roof over your head every month. And If I had a dollar for every person who told me that I was throwing my money away because I chose to rent in a high cost living area because I didn't feel like spending over half my monthly income on a mortgage payment, then I'd be a millionaire. I see renting right now and waiting out the storm, although I would love to own a house, as a good thing. I'm currently sort of going through the same thing you are, less the husband factor. I'm sort of torn between living in a mid-sized city vs a small city, both with home ownership on the horizon at some point, but not now, and maybe not soon, and maybe with the way things are going, not at all. I have to make a decison that keeps all these options going.

Sometimes things happen in life that cause you to redefine yourself, whether they be changing a career, different desires, the fallout of a relationship, and you find that you're not who you thought you were, and that you want different things from yourself and your life, although you're not quite sure what they are, and they seem to compete or even conflict in a sort of inner battle (not with your spouse or another person but just within). I'm kinda in this boat as well. I think alot of people are.

Which is why I have been taking the past year to visit places I think I may want to live and see how I feel about them. You have one up on me as you have lived in many of the places you are considering.

All I can say to you is that there is no easy answer, but don't feel pressured to know or have the answer right NOW or tomorrow, because, life just doesn't work that way.

Philly is a pretty great city. One of my best friends lives there. It's close to other places and the housing isn't ridiculous. You may want to add that to your list.

I don't really have any answers or advice for you. Just hang in there. It will all work itself out somehow.

Cobolt

[JLK706]

I moved from DC down to Charlotte at the convincing of my boyfriend, he sold me with the cheap houses. I know how it is, my condo up there is the same price as a 4 bedroom mcmansion down here. I thought I would like it here, I was ready for an adventure, and I moved. Well now I am borderline hating it and wanting to go back. We have not bought a house yet but we almost did but at the last minute my bf bailed. The house was beautiful and everything we wanted for an unbelievable price but how can that make you happy? Don't you care about living your life? I have learned that I will settle now to get the life I miss so much back. I am already looking at townhouses up there when I thought there was no way I would ever live in a townhouse. You don't realize what you had till its gone. If you think a house will fulfill you I think you maybe wrong. If you think you will be happy anyway and enjoy your new city for what it has to offer than maybe you will be ok but its risky.
I have found many things I do like about Charlotte, its a great city but it doesn't make up for the things I miss. I know I could be happy here but missing my friends, family, and just DC itself overwhelms that.
Also, I find it hard you can't find anything decent outside of the city for 700k. I have been watching prices and they have dropped a ton. The figures you claim are just not true unless you are unwilling to go outside of Arlington?